Filled with Anxiety and Depression

[Bettikins]

I am 68 live alone and now since covid feel more isolated and alone. Although I have friends I feel I have not a best friend that I can share everything with. Why is this upsetting me now ar this stage of my life? Does anyone else have a similar situation. Sometimes my lonliness drives me mad. I get out and walk, do shoppibg but after that I feel that I am in God's waiting room.

[djonmars1973]

Oh no remember you are not alone I am 65 and live alone.I lost my dear mother at the start of the year. This has been possibly the worst year of my life so much change with everything it’s awful. This terrible anxiety started a couple of months ago, I get moments of really bad fear which leaves me exhausted and feeling unwell, at the moment I see no end to it all. Please remember you are not alone I’m feeling it right this second.

[Bettikins in reply to djonmars1973]

Thank you for sharing. Sorry for the lost of your mother. We are not alone in what we are experiencing. But the journey is tough.

[djonmars1973 in reply to Bettikins]

I think the key is to keep busy and even taking up forms of charity work would be a help which would have the bonus of being able to connect with people

[Dreaming2]

I can relate to this

[Bks429]

Hi Bettikins. I am so with you. I am 71, retired. My husband passed in 2018. Last fall I picked up a part time job at an elementary school to keep busy. It was fun and the kids (K-5) uplifting and a joy to be around. Needless to say, with Covid, I am not returning this fall. I have friends I can talk to, but I am jumping out of my skin with loneliness, isolation, inability to do many of the things I was doing. I have knit so many sweaters and watched so much TV I am ready to scream. I feel "cheated." I retired in Dec. 2017 to begin a new phase of life with my then spouse and freedom. He got sick and died in March of 2018. So much for the "plan." Now this....Is this how I spend my retirement? I think that's a strong part of my sadness. I feel cheated. I say that selfishly because I know so many people are in worse off situations than I am, but when you are down, you feel what you feel. So, all that to say, Bettikins, I totally understand and am with you.

[Bettikins in reply to Bks429]

Thank you Bks429 ... I too jump out of my skin with lonliness. My dear husband passed with cancer 8 years ago, I picked up a part time job in a real estate office and now that job is gone. This is not the retirements we envisioned. I had a trip planned to Portugal with my daughter for this past April and because of covid it was cancelled and all I am getting are credits which could be useless. I too have friends but there is a lot of things we are missing out on. Most of my friends are happily married and claim to be doing just fine at this time. They have support. i am tired of Netflix and TV in general. I enjoy 4km walks and my garden but something is missing. You are right about others being in worse shape but it does not change our situation. We have to stay strong. You are more than welcomed to msg ne anytime.

[Hidden]

What do you enjoy doing? Do you have any hobbies or anything new you want to learn? I'm also lonely and it's worse because of covid. I try to keep myself occupied by doing things I enjoy. When covid passes, I'm sure we'll all be doing better mentally. As far as friends go, you can always post to this wonderful group of people and let us know how you're doing.

[Bettikins in reply to Hidden]

Hello Cher356...

Thanks for your response. I do not have a lot of hobbies and know I should acquire more with the way I am feeling. I find the meds I am on makes it difficult. MOMA has some interesting free courses and I did one on Fashion Design.

Yes, the loneliness can be raw sometimes. I do enjoy reading and try to immerse myself. Everyone here is super friendly .

[NiBa5]

Hello

I’m a similar age and alone with 2 cats. I’ve been suffering from depression.. Recovery is very slow. You’re not alone. I feel the same as you do. Hope your day is going ok.

[Bettikins in reply to NiBa5]

Hi there NiBa5.... I too find my recovery very slow. Sometimes I wonder if I ever will feel better. My day has been nice so far..sitting under trees reading. Noce to know that we are not alone..others are in same situation.

I hope your day is going well for you.

[NiBa5 in reply to Bettikins]

Thank you for responding. I feel the same.... I won’t be able to be ok ever again. It’s scary. I’m glad to hear you have a good day today. I’m making my lunch right now.

[Bettikins in reply to NiBa5]

Lunch sounds good. Just curious as to why you feel you will never be okay again? I know it is scary. We want results now not in a week or a month.

[NiBa5 in reply to Bettikins]

My depression was followed PAWS (post acute withdrawals). It messed up my brain badly. I had to stop working because of this. Yes it takes so long for brain to recover once our brain neurotransmission was disturbed .... way too long even if I’m much better than before. It’s very scary.

[katyee8 in reply to NiBa5]

I have the same issues as you are all describing. I have insomnia too from the anxiety and depression. I have a lot of hobbies which help but am very solitary. I take courses online or via Zoom but I need more social contact. Covid 19 is a terrible thing and makes me very anxious. I would really appreciate having more support and that's why I'm here. I'm 63, retired two years ago and female.

[Hidden]

I am anxious and depressed, too. My retirement was totally unplanned. Then I was in a major car wreck. I want to feel better as I bet everyone here does. But wanting does not make it happen. I wish there was a way to feel better that was quick and guaranteed. All I know right now is to keep trying and try to find ways to be connected to others. I need practical advice on how to cook for one. It is causing me anxiety not to enjoy eating. In fact, most of the time, I don't even feel hungry. Does anyone else feel this way?

[katyee8 in reply to Hidden]

I am so sorry you had a major accident. Jeez that must be rough. I hope you find some way of connecting with people and please try to keep up your appetite and eating. Maybe watch the cooking channels to be inspired. I understand what you are going through. Please hang in there. Even little improvements can help you psychologically and physically.

[Gealtachta]

Hi Bettikins,

I[m divorced and 57. I used to always have one friend to call on to do things. I seem to not have that now that my neighbour moved away. I really get the lonely, isolated feelings. My one adult daughter still lives at home for now. We do talk etc. and she has anxiety as well. She has her friends over and I really feel isolated. I need to invite someone over too!

I don't because reaching sometimes is scary and hard.