FED UP.

[SxufferingSxoul]

Why does this happen to me? Will I be like this forever?? I keep getting this strange feeling, it’s an emotion, not anger nor sadness or anything else and it’s bothering me so much. IT’S SO UNCOMFORTABLE I WANT TO CRY. People say that that “unknown emotion” is derealization. How is that derealization? I’m so scared and worried about that feeling, it’s debilitating. The world around me also feels like an unpleasant place, it feels different in a bad way. The thoughts of “why is this, this way? Why is that like that?” I am so worried that I will suffer like this for a long time, it’s making me fed up. Existence just feels scary because the world around me feels awful.

[Danzdanz123]

Do you also get the feeling like it’s unbearable to live like this. It’s like as If because we have recognised it it’s unrecognisable and it feels like it’s going to be this way forever! Do you also feel like everything is pointless too? And are your memories also affected with strange emotion because mine are nothing feels the same it’s like you can’t escape it even in your dreams! How long have you been feeling like this for?

[SxufferingSxoul in reply to Danzdanz123]

Oh my god yes I do.. When I get memories they feel unpleasant. I’ve had mental issues for years but this one is new, only two weeks ago. You are literally explaining every single thing I struggled to explain! There is no way that I will not feel this some time.

[Danzdanz123 in reply to SxufferingSxoul]

I’m happy I’ve actually found someone that’s feeling the same way I read a few of your posts and you said you thought you was going into a psychosis? That’s how I’m feeling right now it’s horrible lee thinking I’m going to start seeing things or hearing things. It’s so hard to explain isn’t it because it’s a feeling we have never felt before! I also try and picture myself doing normal things and I can’t or like even picture my future it’s just affected by everything and everything I do my heads telling me I’m insane! How have you been feeling today?

[SxufferingSxoul in reply to Danzdanz123]

Yeah I still worry about having psychosis, or some undiscovered mental disease. I also get this feeling where I am aware of every single thing I do and it scares me. However, I did ask my therapist he said that it’s derealization/depersonalization but I find it impossible to believe. I also can’t picture my future, because I just know I will feel like that. It bothers me how people say: only you can help yourself. I can’t! I try but I really can’t! It doesn’t work. I am only 17, and seeing other people my age all happy and not mentally suffering like me tears me apart. Trust me, this feeling made me actually feel like I’m going crazy and caused me several panic attacks in the same day and several trips to the ER.

[Danzdanz123 in reply to SxufferingSxoul]

I feel so bad for you at such a young age I mean I was suffering with anxiety and panics attacks at that age but they were manageable and I never got this god awful feeling! I think one thing you can think is that if you didn’t feel like this before then surely you can not feel like this again especially if you recognise it! And same o get this I watch every action I do and everything I say it’s constant I am also petrified of being diagnosed with a mental illness what makes it worse is that my dad has fully lost his mind to schizophrenia and it absolutely scares me to death that I’m going to be just like him. I’m 23 btw I’ve been getting this weird feeling since October I’ve always suffered with anxiety depression and panic attacks since being little but never this feeling! I would like to mention as well that for the last 4/5 weeks I was feeling better and wasn’t feel crazy had some feeling of things arent real but it was manageable so if we are feeling the same then there’s hope for you! Honestly panic attacks are the worst I feel so bad for you! Is there anything that distracts you for even just a small amount of time?

[SxufferingSxoul in reply to Danzdanz123]

Nothing is making me feel better at all what’s scary is that it starts so suddenly... and I will be happy as if I never had that feeling before afterwards.. It worries me that I have bipolar so much.

[Danzdanz123 in reply to SxufferingSxoul]

Don’t worry I get this I’ll feel okay for about 2 seconds then feel really really bad again I also thought I had bipolar not sure if I do or just petrified of having something I don’t want hopefully we can get through this!

[SxufferingSxoul in reply to Danzdanz123]

Don’t even get me started on the dreams, when I wake up they bother me a lot lol.

[guynfl2chat]

I understand. Sometimes I feel very disconnected from what is around me. Especially during these times it impossible to feel connected when we have to stay away from each other. I am developing new coping mechanisms that also trigger bad feelings and thoughts. For example as I type this I feel like I am not even present in the moment. I think you have anxiety and it lives well in our fear of our thoughts of the unknown. I have said this in the past, I think its important to allow yourself to feel and own it. Dont be afraid of good or bad feels, but let them roll in. I think way too much about how I am feeling everyday. I call it a check engine light for my body and mind. We are much more complicated then that and need to just feel.

[CourageousCloud]

Yes, I know the feelings you speak of. I'm a little better able to handle these things by studying cognitive behavioral therapy and meditation. I've also been recently introduced to "grounding" techniques. I'm taking baby steps in the right direction, anyway. I recently felt like that and sat down in a calm, peaceful place and practiced my deep breathing to start with. Then I spoke aloud to myself, "Okay...right now you're feeling..." And I slowly described it. I made a point of speaking slowly and calmly, describing how I felt, why I thought I was feeling it, and reminding myself not to fight it, but just accept it and to embrace it.

[Survivor4Ever]

It really can be I been there and at times feel that way . What you said reminds me of two quotes I really like “Change your thoughts and you change your world” by Norman Vincent Peale and also another quote “ If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change” by Wayne Dyer. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves we are NOT our thoughts. We are separate from them. They can consume you if you let them. It’s hard trust me trying to keep your head above water. But you can’t give up. You have to remember your value and how special you are. And that you are loved and that you matter