Suicide - TRIGGER - signs : My brother... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Suicide - TRIGGER - signs

Starrlight profile image
17 Replies

My brother killed him self around this time of year in ‘97 I’ve been praying for him and asking spiritually to connect with him to turn bad memories in for good ones.

Today I am feeling suicidal and thinking of suicide and my pain makes me itch to act but my family keeps me going and God keeps me going instead of acting on my feelings on the other side of happy and calm,...

I need a sign. Has anyone ever gotten a sign that told them to keep going it’s going to be okay? One day many years ago I was depressed went outside in the night and stared at the sky asking for hope and a shooting star traveled over to me and into me... it looked like a 3D sticker... When I felt it come down on me I felt hope and love strength and faith renewed. Writing this now I am sitting exactly where I did that day. It’s so windy and the wind chimes play a lingering song, I listen as blossoms dance through the air. I need a sign that God is in Control and things will be ok. I can’t do this alone. I need God’s guidance. But I don’t deserve it but I believe hHe has mercy so I pray. But will I even have the strength to listen? Trying.

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Starrlight
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17 Replies

I can't answer your question about spirituality.

But I think your continual searching is a sign of strength.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to

Thank you so much Ladysndthrpetdog ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ That means a lot to me.

Sprinkle1 profile image
Sprinkle1

The fact that you have had help before, shows that help is here for you now. For one thing you have written to us. We understand how you feel, we send you Buckets full of godly love, Big Virtual Hugs. Keep on praying....Sprinkle 1.....

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Sprinkle1

I hope so. I feel things have shifted since the help. So I need more. Thanks for words of hope.

Thanks big virtual hug to you, too ❤️ ((((((((

All_alone profile image
All_alone

I do hope your memories turn good and another shooting star, a ray of sunshine- any sign blows to you on this wind. 🙏❤🌠

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to All_alone

((((((( ❤️ All_alone ❤️)))))))) you are beautiful and I thank you. Looking out for signs...

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Amazing ... how cool... ❤️ Thanks bro

lovetodance2018 profile image
lovetodance2018

Thank you for sharing your story. Like Ellinaki said I see signs all the time. Listening to birds, seeing the sun, smelling the flowers all remind me that God is in control. I have been spending a lot of time listening to sermons and inspirational songs. Today one came in my mind that I used to sing at camp when I was young. I think just having that song come to my mind is a sign. Each morning I wake up with a praise song and focus on the lyrics throughout the day to encourage me and know God is walking by my side and knows what is going on in the world and has it under control. We may not see or understand, but He knows everything. I remind myself of this verse Isaiah 55:8-9

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,”declares the Lord.

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.

The song I sang at camp is called: Day By Day - bit.ly/2y7Esft

Day by day

Day by day

Oh, Dear Lord

Three things I pray

To see thee more clearly

Love thee more dearly

Follow thee more nearly

Day by day

I pray you are encouraged today and know how special you are and the God loves you and has a plan every day for your life. Hugs!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to lovetodance2018

Blessings to you. Thanks I hope I see what I am meant to see and that I don’t self sabotage because I’ve been not believing and in believing were the best of days. I am in a hole and I need to be strong to get out.

lovetodance2018 profile image
lovetodance2018 in reply to Starrlight

I know you will be strong and remember your strength comes from God. You are not alone on this journey of life. We are here to encourage and love on you. Stay strong my friend. I know you can do it! Hugs! Psalm 28:7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.

This verse and song is very encouraging. bit.ly/34qehwC My prayers continue to be with you. Hugs!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to lovetodance2018

I appreciate your thoughts and prayers. I am in the midsts of strengthening my spirituality... something tells me it’s time to.

XoxoFaith profile image
XoxoFaith

Hi beautiful we got to keep on being strong for our kids it is really hard I know I hate having anxiety everyday and interfering with my day but I always say you are not going to win me anxiety I'm stronger and I also pray to God to help me get through my days please be strong and remember we are all here for you ❤️

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to XoxoFaith

You are strong. I know I can be but I feel so weak right now. I’m not living the life I want. I’m not who I want to be. I sabotage myself. That I know. A good next step would be to stop.

Confused000 profile image
Confused000

Hi, I struggled for so long with suicidal thoughts as well, still do quite often, but I try to cancel these thoughts, try to convince myself that I shouldn't give up, that there are greater things ahead. Lately I've been using quotes as a coping mechanism I could say. One that helps me in hard times is "you only have one life as you are". So whether you believe in reincarnation or whatever, you still have only this life in this form of yourself, so why not make the best out of it?

Also I try to think of this "every moment is the best moment of your life" and as well of " don't wait for the ideal day, have that ideal day today".

So I take these out of context a bit and I am just trying to leave out other thoughts and worries and just try to live in the present, in this day, not thinking about what's been wrong yesterday or what could go wrong tomorrow. Just being present, feeling gratitude towards the fact that I still have a chance to make a change, to live another day, another story.

It seems really clichee but once you start believing, it gives you hope and strenght.

I think that one step towards getting better would totally be aknowledging gratitude.

I used to feel the opposite, like why did I wake up, why am I not like others, why don't I have this, why don't I feel like that..

And I'm starting to treat things differently, I feel grateful that I woke up today when so many didn't have this opportunity, grateful that I have food, water, whatever, just grateful in general, for life.

But still, it has to come from within, from yourself, because no matter what, still no one can make you better, you have to do it yourself, you have to want to go through the pain of another day in order to get to that light that maybe can not even be seen now.

Easy to say, hard to put into practice. Feels impossible even, but it's not, and you can do it! You truly do!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Confused000

I wish to have what you do. Sounds beautiful. I’ve been there but hard to imagine it for me now. Right now I am having trouble truly within and it’s hard to imagine a good day... I don’t know if I’m trying my best but I am trying and I’m so tired out from it

Poodie profile image
Poodie

❤️❤️❤️ I will be hoping and thinking of you.

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to Poodie

Thank you 🙏 😊

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