I'm sort of panicking...: Umm... Two of... - Anxiety and Depre...

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I'm sort of panicking...

SilentSinger55 profile image
5 Replies

Umm... Two of my best friends aren't responding to any of my messages on anything and I'm kind of freaking out...

First it was Chris, who I've posted about a couple of times. She was talking to Jackie and I in a group chat one day and just stopped responding. She posted once on a Google classroom page the next day but that is the last I've heard from her. I have messages her probably twenty times total on skype, gmail, HU, and just regular texting. I'm scared something happened to her and, from what I've heard from her and Jackie, if something did, her parents would probably not tell us. If she hurt herself, I feel like her parents would blame us and that could be why we are being completely ignored. Or, she could've gotten grounded and forgotten to post on the Google classroom page. Maybe I'm just completely paranoid.

After I was already freaking out about Chris, Jackie stopped responding to me about 48 hours ago now. Jackie is a different story though because her mom was planning to have her assessed to see if she was fit to stay in an inpatient psychiatric facility for a while. The reason I'm still getting so worked up though is because she promised me she would send me an email before she went. She even talked to her mom about it and she agreed it was okay. Jackie is not the kind of person to go back on promises.

I'm really panicking about both of these situations especially because of this whole social distancing thing. With the lack of proper communication, I don't really know how they've been. They both have severe mental health issues and are honestly at risk of hurting themselves. (I'm not their parents favorite person because of past issues. They would not feel inclined to tell me.) I'm just trying to do my best to stay calm about it and still try to be a supportive friend even if they aren't receiving the messages. I sent them each a message telling them how much I love them and how worried I am. I just hope they're okay...

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SilentSinger55
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5 Replies

Could they have run out of credit? Left their phone switched off for a while?

How old are you and your friends?

Are they old enough and well enough to make a declaration that they want you kept informed if they go into hospital ?

Why is there still a problem between you and the parents - if her mom said it would be ok ?

Do you have any contact numbers for any of the parents or siblings of other friends?

SilentSinger55 profile image
SilentSinger55 in reply to Mary-intussuception

We are all only 16 so no, they have no rights to make a declaration to keep me informed. I know this is a stereotypical comment to make but they're teenagers and there's no school, I don't think they'd have their phones turned off for this long. If they did run out of credit, they have tablets and computers they could use to get on gmail, skype, or here to keep me updated. The parents are okay with them talking to me but if there really was an emergency involving their mental health, I really don't think they would contact me. I made some terrible decisions in the past, all of my friends did. We did some pretty bad things together but unfortunately, I was the only one who was caught. I am seen as a bad influence on my friends But our friendship has continued because I have proven that after a lot of theropy, I am practically a different person than the one they once knew. Sorry that question took so much explaining that was just the most condensed version there is if I'm being honest.

Mary-intussuception profile image
Mary-intussuception in reply to SilentSinger55

That's OK, no need to apologise. Not too long at all.

You are so brave, you've acknowledged past wrongs, not blamed others and seem very mature. I recall that I was at 16.

At 16 you are all adults and have some rights. You would have to check this out though with some appropriate charity / helpline. Might be tricky just now.

You must have their postal addresses , do you have a couple of stamps ? I would write short letters to each of them .

Hope you hear something soon.

Please keep me informed x

Edit:

ps

About 'rights ' - finding out our rights and enforcing them is one way. But if some healthy communication could happen between you & your friends parents I think that would be best.

After all they are your friends. You probably want to all be friends for life so I don't think you would want their parents to be enemies. Keeping things amicable would be best - something you seem to have achieved so far.

Is there anyway your parents could help? Could either of them contact your friends' parents.

Are you in touch with school teachers, having any remote classes via Skype for example ? Is there a School Counsellor you can contact? There must be someone who can make enquiries and get back to you.

SilentSinger55 profile image
SilentSinger55 in reply to Mary-intussuception

I don't have their addresses, sadly. My mom was just beginning to trust is enough to hang out when the whole quarentine/social distancing thing happened. I can't tell my parents that they aren't in a good place mentally. They would have me and the friendship right then and there. I've thought about asking a specific school teacher that I trust if they've heard from them and I just might do that if I don't here from them today.

Thank you so much for the advice. You've been very helpful!

Mary-intussuception profile image
Mary-intussuception in reply to SilentSinger55

You're welcome, come back on here or message me anytime.

Take care of you now too - you are a good friend.

God Bless xx

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