Today's our anniversary my wife want's a divorce.

[Roo42]

Today's is my anniversary. A few weeks ago my wife informed me that she was no longer in love with me and want's a divorce. I don't want to get into details but I have been mistreated at home for a while now. I ended up in a Hospital after receiving the news. Today I went to see my therapist and She told me not to contact her today. I really miss my wife and wish she would of gave us a chance but she was telling my friends, family, and myself that everything was fine. I was never given a chance to work on what she felt was wrong with our marriage. I am also very sad for our children involved the youngest is not taking it well.

[Agora1]

Oh Roo42, I am so sorry in what you are going through. I could imagine it feels very

unfair that you weren't aware of her feelings and able to discuss this together. She

has apparently been thinking about this for a while and yet choose not to involve you

in her decision.

Divorce is very heartbreaking. I feel for your little one as well. Your therapist is right

in that you should not contact your wife today. She knows it's your anniversary. Getting

in touch with her on this special day will only prove to deepen the wounds.

It's unfortunate but we cannot change another's feelings. We can only have control over

our own and how we accept it. Keep going for therapy, it will be your stepping stone to

healing. I wish you well. This forum will also be your safe place to come and talk with

others going through the same thing. You are not alone my friend.

[Roo42 in reply to Agora1]

Thanks for the kind words. I am in a safe place living with good friends that are supporting me. I am now getting treatment for my Depression, anxiety, and PTSD. I promised my son I will make it thru this for him. I hope I don't let him down.

[Poodie in reply to Roo42]

Hi Roo 42.

I am so sorry this is happening to you. Is is very sad that your wife does not want to work on your marriage and that you have children who are being affected. Please cope and do it for yourself and your son. There is not much you can do that can change someone else’s feeling if they are unwilling to try.

You do need to take good care of yourself. This will provide your kids with a good example and they will cope with your help. Of course you are all hurt and feeling sad. I will be thinking of you and will follow to see how you are. There are several people on here who are going thru this with a spouse. People here do care and will respond.

[Want2BHappy3]

Sorry for you, you can’t make a horse drink the water as they say. You need to get your kids into counseling too? Sometimes they will feel responsible for it? Hate to ask this?, but is she seeing someone else? I went through a divorce kinda like you did, he was seeing someone else, which was why he didn’t want to work things out. He thought the grass was greener on the other side? And he became verbally abusive to me and my kids so we left because I was afraid he would become physical You might have to let her go? Give her time, maybe she’ll change her mind? If she does? Suggest couples counseling? PLEASE give your kids lots of love and attention, They need you now more than ever 🙏🏼

[Roo42 in reply to Want2BHappy3]

I have set the boy up with a therapist. I miss my family so much I would do almost anything to reconcile our relationship but her mind is made up and she said I am too late. I still love her and hope one day to be back together.

[Want2BHappy3 in reply to Roo42]

That’s Great, you never know? They think the grass is always greener??? We had separated once before because he cheated we stayed together for 10 more years, cheated again this time having kids with other women. That was it. Please don’t Beg her that’s the Worst thing you can do??? Just stand back as hard as that is. The Best to you and The kids

[Hidden]

I am so sorry...my heart goes out to you and I'll keep you in my thoughts.

This seems to happen more and more these days...people bail without trying..marriage therapy..etc..

The days will get less heavier and more bearable as time goes on..right now it seems like it won't..you're devastated..feeling lost in life..it's important to keep yourself and your kids in therapy..keep a support group..they do have support groups for this..if you want to cry..let it out..it's important to feel your feelings...what's happening to the institution of marriage and the vows? I'm struggling in my marriage too and shocked we are still together there's no intimacy no communication....ask about a group to connect with other dad's or men going through this. Try meetup.com ..you can even start your own group. 2 or more is a group. I used to work with kids as a Therapist..I have an autoimmune disorder and had to leave..I'm doing well but lost my friends ...I have 2 good faithful friends..reach out.its also important to get your kids into therapy please look on healthgrades.com a free app to find a good therapist near you and read reviews. My blessings and please keep me posted..His🙏❤️

[Roo42]

I hope your marriage works out and your get healthy. I sensed something was wrong but I wrote it off to stress since she went back to school. I have good friends and a support system. But I am physically disabled now. I also have ben diagnosed with severe depression, PTSD, and anxiety.