My relationship with my brother is ok , he suffers from alot of mental problems and i respect he always comes when he needs help eventhough god knows i deserve it more
I was the youngest , a kid who invested everything to make everything in my family peaceful, i had to keep endless secrets, witness endless fights that turned violent that i believe scarred me for life , while he would always get drunk, do all sorts of crap and abuse my family members and parents physically and emotionally , and somehow my parents worship the ground he walks on, its even a joke between me and my sisters how there is a hierarchy of love in their eyes that consists of him on top
He always comes needing help and complain about everything, weird to see someone in their mid 20s acting so immature about simple things and causing fights with everyone, while i had to postpone my mental health for the sake of my family because ironically he would always come when i need the most help and sweeps all the attention , god knows how many times i told my family how screwed up my mental health is , all the nights i sleep convinced i wont wake up , thinking my health is deteriorating and im going to die because its been more than a year of panic attacks without treatment that i desperately need which i eventually had to pay for it on my own ,
While my brother who is 26 hasnt graduated because he is such an irresponsable human being given all the money he needed for his education, allowance , AND THERAPY!!
Someone please tell me this isnt favorism because for gods sake i feel so angry knowing how bad i suffered when i didnt need to , and how good i did to my family between all the secrets , all the talks with sides of each family to create peace , through each and every fight which were almost a daily occurance, bein there is emergency rooms when fights turned ugly , and through legal work too , being supportive despite all the fright and panic ...im beyond angry even for seeing how truly good people get the worst lives where i started developing depression and really bad and scary thoughts .
I wouldnt be like this otherwise, i could have had a whole other life 😭😭😭
My first therapy appointment is in 2 days , paid by me, while he doesnt have to pay anything , you should see how my parents treated him today when he came , despite the fact he has been in town for two days and didnt bother to tell us and always ignires my parents phonecalls , he is a horrible person sometimes he always favors his friend who drag him to all sorts of crap over us , and i cant believe they still treat him bettter than me who has always been the best son they every asked for , no im not being arrogant, i never even once dares to do anything to upset them knowing how things are , great marks , high honors , etc...
I dont know what else to do.
My Brother
Worried About My Mother
i dont get it
How to support family members with GAD
