Is it ever going to end.

[Deepoceanic]

Will I am in a more depressive state as of late. Makes sense since I flunked out of nursing so merry Christmas to me. I have been crying every day and withdrawing from my family since I have no idea how to tell them the news. Especially my father who took out loans for that of course I will pay back but need to get past telling him. He won’t understand he is not one that understands about mental diseases. I tried my best to focus in school but spent hours on the same page studying and not absorbing anything. I have tried counseling and meds but I was still getting worse. I thought I could do school with anxiety and depression but I guess not. Now I am back to square one still living at home with my parents and no future. On top of all that my emotional is way passed capacity and can’t take anymore more pain. I don’t how to deal with the coming pain of waiting how my family reacts especially my dad. I don’t think I can take his reaction which sometimes my mind tells me, I don’t have to experience anymore pain and that answer seems so appealing to me right now. Sometimes I wonder what am I trying at life for since it’s not going anywhere and it won’t. I know it’s long but I need to vent since can’t handle my emotions anymore. Just holding on by a thread day by day.

[Tellmeaboutit]

hi there.

we’ve all been there. i feel for you, deeply. i wish there were an easy answer, but i havent found any

talking helps, so you did the right thing coming here. sorry no one replied sooner. are you still there? let usknow if youre still reading.

the good news is that there are answers, just not easy ones. you need to stay or go back to counseling, keep trying different medications (some take weeks to have a stable effect). learn as much as you can about your own condition, tell yourdoctors everything. also, try to educate your family and other supporters. youre right that very few who have not had depression can understand what it’s like, how debilitating it can be, how it feeds on itself.

have you considered talking to your mother first, then enlisting her help to explain it to your father?

i do know how hard it is to do these things, but you must ask for help. there is a way out. most importantly dont give up.

please write back andtell us how youre doing.