I am sure most of you longer term people know that I have been on this site for just over a year and that I have tried to help as many people as I feasibly can. Right?
Well sometimes those efforts go awry despite my best of intentions. Recently a situation blew up in my face and it hurt me severely.
I can't tell you I'm 100% innocent because, I'm not perfect. What I can tell you is that I really care about people and I genuinely try to help as many as I can.
I am hurting badly right now and could use some words of encouragement or I might just up and leave forever....That would be harmful to the many future people I could help...
But, I am really sad and down right now....Maybe I am the wrong person to even be trying to reach out to others, although that has never stopped me before....
If you have some kind words for a much beleaguered helper, I'd like to hear them. Okay?
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JEG325
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You really must keep on trying to help others. Many people including myself have gained great help from you.
Do not let one situation stop you. We have all had things we have said taken the wrong way at times. Try not to take it too much to heart. You are a sensitive bloke and that is a great thing to be. You wear your heart in your sleeve a bit and I do that as well. It makes us more available to people who need help but also means we can be hurt. The important thing is not to let it stop you being helpful and kind to those in need.
You are so sweet, K....But, I'm worried....I am still fearful of reprisal, even though, I have only tried to help others. I am well aware that am overemotional and that it can be a problem sometimes.
But, I have helped hundreds in my time on here. Should this one problem negate all of that and stop me from a future of helping others? I would like to think it wouldn't....
I commend you for helping others and I have a feeling you will continue to do so yet it sounds like right now you could use a break and receive help. I’m here for you any time and rooting for you! Let me know if you are up for talking I can listen... you can PM me any time.
Thank, you, S. Yes, I thought of you, my long time friend- right away. Of all the people here, except for 1 or 2, you know me and my heart the best...You know, I would never deliberately hurt anyone....
Thanks for you for you graciousness and kind words, my very awesome friend....
I know my friend; you would never hurt anyone intentionally. I have done the same as you know and all we can do is apologize, forgive ourselves and try again, you know... but it just really hurts... we are sensitive with huge hearts to be broken and we with God’s help will mend the heart back together and it will shine more beautifully than ever afterwards.
First... big hug JEG325. Take a big deep breathe & slowly follow it out. I don't know the situation you are talking about, but it sounds like both sides are hurting (?) A part of the problem is the way communication on the internet works, it's hard to read people... people can read each post (etc) very differently & not get what the writer was truly saying. You throw in mental health- anxiety, depression, ect & it becomes even harder. I am sure some of us have hurt, upset someone without meaning to.
JEG325, I know you have a big caring heart. And you are owning your part... maybe you & the other person need a step back from it. "Talk" with a clearer calmer mind. You both are valuable. You belong here.... maybe take a break... maybe just talk to members you know here for a bit if that feels safe. It's okay..
It's over between those that were involved and me....And yes, I am not perfect and I had some responsibility for it, I will never shirk any fault I have.
But, the more I think about the more I am seriously considering just walking away forever....
I don't know how much more my nerves, emotions and heart can take.
JEG325 keep talking it out & reaching out... to someone face to face, on phone or PM a trusted friend here if you can. I get it... those thoughts can be very dark & loud... they also lie. And your friends & love ones know those thoughts aren't true. Try to be gentler on yourself... some extra self care... it's okay to put yourself first.💛
Thanks for your understanding. My sweetie IS so very caring and sometimes a pushover because of that. He's the one who will allow someone to be unkind to him and not return the unkindness but be a listener and supporter to that very person! He's a super softie who has been hurt by broken promises of support. I'm so glad you know him well enough to support him today!🌿🙏🌈🦋🔆💜
It's the least I can do... you both are super supportive big hearted people, have been there for me. I don't know what happened, I read your post too... I don't have the strength right now to be super active on the site. I like to think I have a big heart too... right now I am learning to take care of me too.When I saw his post, I had to let him (& you) know I am here & care. Please take care of each other & yourselves. Big hugs & love... you both have support here.💛😊🌹🕊
We can talk if that would help you...don't hesitate to pm me or I'll give you my email address in a pm as soon as I get off here. I don't want you hurting and if I can be of any help, let me know. Maybe you just want a listening ear...I can do that. Hugs!!!!
Thanks... will definitely keep that in mind. Mental health is a long extra bumpy road to health. It's hard to realize you aren't alone. Trust is a huge thing I am learning.... thanks.
Big curve there, trust me....No pun intended. But, my lady says that I have a good heart, maybe too good of a heart and that I will go on trusting and helping as long as I am able because that's just the kind of person I am...
I am here for you too, MB. Maybe I can justify my lady's belief in me.....
If helping others brings you Joy than you must keep doing it. Sometimes our best intentions don't turn out the way we would like, but if the help you give is sincere and comes from the heart it is still worth continuing. Hang in there.
I agree with the others. If helping others brings you joy then please keep doing so. Sometimes things happen and situations don’t go as we would have hoped...in time things will settle.
We talked this morning, and I hoped I was able to help. You know I try to give you the best I have, and I know you do the same for me. You are a good man with a big heart who wants to help everyone. You certainly have helped me over the months we've been talking. I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better. I believe you will find your balance again and be back helping those you can. Hang in there. Lynne
Thank you so much. That means a lot. But, it goes even deeper than what I said this morning. I am now having a crisis of spirit too. It feels like this has tainted my very soul....
Replied earlier, not sure why it did not appear. I have gained much from your help and advice and sharing your experience. It gives me hope to know the depth of your struggles and the joy and happiness you have shared. You make this site warm and real. Please continue to share. It helpes me, and many others.
God bless you, my friend! I am having a real crisis of spirit right now. But, your answer sure made me feel better! Have a blessed day....
Hi J! Well I have empathy for you as I myself have had this happen here...you said it yourself...you came with the best of intentions...one can want for nothing more!
It would be silly..in my opinion...for you to leave...why? I'd miss ya...
Ya know people come into our lives for certain reasons and seasons...sadly I guess not all stay with us...just like watching all the leaves fall off the trees this time of year...What you really want in a friend ..like a tree...is the roots, they are grounded and firm, can take a whole lot...also great to lean on...if you'd like to give me a ring...I'll be waiting...yes some snow on the ground today oh my!
I'm here for you my dear friend...please stay...don't go running anywhere on us!!!
Dump trucks of groovy love, peace, light, joy and hugs for you!
May you have some sparkle today, looks like maybe you are with all the replies here...I sure hope so for you!!!
YOU ROCK, MY FRIEND! That was awesome! I love the fall metaphor and the line about snow. I miss that here in Florida more than anything. Got any pics of it?
Ya know I wasn't all that smart this year...didn't get any pretty fall pic's...I'll be taking winter ones for sure...most of the trees are bare here...already...
That's why I love living in Pa., you get to have every season....and all at the start are so beautiful...winter lasts a little longer than I care to have....yet it is what it is...
Dump trucks of groovy love, peace, light, joy and hugs!
I'm sorry this happened. As many folks already said, with depression and anxiety we are a tender bunch. Just an FYI that you helped me about a month ago by suggesting some supplements and it helped not only me but my son and daughter in law. So thank you for that. I am sorry for your wounded spirit. I can tell you are a kind person.
Aww....I am glad I helped you and your family. I hope they are doing awesome. Thanks for the kind words and your support!
We need you here. Some people just like in the real world aren't gonna respond appropriately and it's confusing. You are so good to all of us. Just remember that people here have all kinds of issues and can respond with anger just like running into those people at the store or work. I'm sure it wasn't you at all. Please stay with us. 😊🙏
You have also helped me with a very informative post and I always read your other posts as I know they will also be very helpful. You obviously put in a lot of thought and time and it would be sad if you didn't continue to do this. Many Blessings to you!
Thank you for the kind words. I had a severe crisis of my soul earlier. I actually wanted to start writing some more regular posts about supplements and such, maybe share some more poetry and maybe sometimes just put up an uplifting post to raise people's hopes and spirits....
But what happened to me robbed me of my motivation and dedication to the cause of helping others, as once in a great while I seem to get in over my head.
It didn't end well and left me grieving considerably....
I just need sleep now and that's where I'm heading. Have a blessed day, W146!
Hi jeg sorry you are feeling so down. Many of us have helped a lot of people here (including me) and have been slagged off for it. The Iast time (and it is the last time I will help others too like this) I tried to advise a new member about privacy on here so they could make up their own minds whether to lock their posts or not.
The result? I was attacked and no one came to my despite a number of replies (including one from you) and I was feeling very alone and unwanted.
As one long term member 'They have been bitten so often trying to help they need a blood transfusion!'. We all need to support each other even if only saying they mean well even if it has been taken wrongly.
I do hope you stay though as you add a lot to the site x
I wasn't having a go at you my friend so please don't think that. I was just making a point that we aren't always aware of how others can be feeling and I am sure I do it too without meaning to.
I too have put up posts similar to yours feeling very unwanted and unloved and the support I get back (just like you are) always comforts me and makes it worthwhile staying for the vast majority of good folks on here x
I've been told that life happens....Sometimes it's almost more than we can bear. It's what we do at those moments that defines who we are. I wrote a beautiful, powerful poem called, 'I Will Rise Again', to explain that we can all rise again and find a useful, successful niche in life.
I am thinking about sharing the poem with the site....Hope you are having a blessed day....
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not doing well…
Not doing good at all
Was doing so well
“Not today and not tomorrow”
I laid in bed all day today, feeling ashamed
