I am a lost Soul

[Purple-Monkey]

some days i feel i'm ready to take on the world despite my challenges. Other days, like today, I feel so worthless..like I have no purpose, no interests, no goals, i feel like a waste of space, a jobless burden to society. I am very socially awkward, last weekend my friend invited me to hang with her friends, I was the weirdo in the group. I could suddenly feel my low self esteem, lack of confidence and anxiety come into play. My parents don't seem to understand my mood changes and my lack of interest in things that most people find interesting, neither do I. But I want to get better, I just don't know how..I've tried for so long. I am almost 30 and I feel very lost in life. A question i am never really able to answer is "Tell me about yourself" I don't know who I am and I seem not to be bothered by it. I'm so miserable ..a very confused lost soul.

[RockClimbing]

Hi Purple-Monkey. I saw your post and just wanted you to know you are not alone in feeling lost, socially awkward, misunderstood. Try to be kind to yourself. I too suffer from all these feelings and today is a real struggle for me. But this group is very supportive and it’s good that you’re posting. I don’t have any great advice. I just keep trying to distract myself and try to focus on work. Do you like yoga or meditation? Those usually work for me. I’m sorry I’m probably not very helpfully, just wanted you to know someone is here to listen.

[elderspectrum]

Yes, try to be kinder to yourself and don't be so hard on yourself. If you are without a job, it's important to get out of the house and get involved in activities. I find that volunteering is very helpful to me. I am retired and I volunteer with a non-profit community center three days a week. I've been ill with depression and anxiety for over two months, but I've recently returned to work. It's not because I'm any better than I was a month ago. I need to feel that I have a purpose and something to do rather than spend the day worrying and ruminating over my symptoms. I don't feel "normal" at work, but that's OK because I'm sick, and they're understanding at my place of work. You are not alone. Many people on this forum feel the same way you and I do. We're all here to support each other on our journey to recovery.

[56artist_ in reply to elderspectrum]

Great reply love it you hang in there don't let that dark tunnel keep you there keep searching for that light

[dbeck128]

I know this feeling all too well. People don't understand the mood swings. Or anything else for that matter, until you live that way or have it.

I dont know much about myself either. I'm just here most days. Sometimes I wanna look at myself through someone else's eyes to see how I'm perceived. My mom is pretty understand bc all of the women including her have mental health issues. My step dad however doesnt. Because he hasnt ever experienced it. So of course he doesnt know what to do or how to understand.

I have been looking for the answer to get better as well. I always say I want to. But then I never know how either.

You're not alone, though I wish I had the answers.

I hope you feel better soon.

[jesca18]

I related to everything you’ve said. I am 30 years old. Feel free to DM if you ever need a friend to talk to.

[56artist_]

Woe we must be the same I am in that boat with you 40 yrs of anorexia 7 years nearly treatment and still go who am I without anorexia 57 now been ill since 14 recovery tough road I made it who am I now older most my life ill and just existing steer makes a relapse easy but waited so long for treatment because of denial now I can not relapse it will destroy me I just fight harder to stay recovered I think as I age and we become more feeble I will have to fight harder but I must to survive I feel lost as well sometimes but I always pull through and see the woman I am today after recovery live happy and no longer a prisoner of anorexia

[56artist_]

Stress makes relapse not steer u see no proofreading before send that's me gives us something to laugh over right

[Hollick]

Sorry, I could relate to lots..the fact that somewhere you want to get better, is a very good sign...may God help us both to find direction and help to put us on a good path..persevere all that you can. 🙏

[56artist_]

Yep been there but in last 4 yrs anorexia recently recovered 7 yrs treatment I recovered not easy Anorexia a hard fight to win I made it but recover daily to never let it take me again I would not make it 57 and waited too long to seek help low SELF-ESTEEM I had it all those yrs and sometimes I get that feeling but not like before recovery it took me a lifetime to get to my place in life and low self-esteem will not be in my life anymore nor no self worth do not let the enemy of mind keep you a prisoner like I was before treatment I was anorexic since 14. 40 yrs wow no more