I don't wanna help myself

[BrettS119]

I'm at a point now where I don't want to help myself get better. I just don't think I ever will. This morning, I couldn't get up when my alarm went off and it made me feel hopeless. I tried stabbing my arm a few times but never cut it open, although I really wanted to. My life just seems like it's going nowhere and I have no motivation to fix it. I can't really motivate myself to do anything. I feel I'd be better off dead.

[Hidden]

This is a very dark an difficult point to be at. It’s time to reach out if you can, tell someone you’re not feeling like yourself and need to speak with a therapist, or make an appointment yourself and hold on through support until you’re there, also if you start feeling like this is getting worse then it’s okay to have to go to the hospital and tell them you are having these thoughts, they’ll help find someone for you to talk to more quickly, I know you’re trying. But those thoughts( and actions) of self harm are very dangerous and hurtful to your well being.. I’m glad you didn’t go through with it, but that’s a dark road, it’s time to try to make a turn from that path( even if it’s just a slight turn) I’m here to support in any way I can, because I know how that feels. Trust me you are not better of dead, and the world would be much worse off without you. I believe everyone has something to contribute ( especially people like us, because we see all the bad, that some people don’t seem to notice) even if it’s hard, sometimes it helps to find something in the short term to look forward too. anything really, plan a day to the movies with a family member or an old friend, or just find something simple you haven’t experienced before that you think might be fun ( if it isn’t fun oh well, we’ll try something different next week) hang in there, and say what you need to say, but please try your best to steer away from self harm. And honestly, the point your illness has pushed you to, might not be what you really want when you’re depression starts to lighten up again( and it will eventually, maybe with the help of a professional, but it will get better)

[HopeWithSmile]

BrettS119, don’t give up. Don’t let this darkness win.

Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.