Feeling like I’ve failed at life

[Jax27]

Going to back to school at 36 was hard . Having a job lined up and a huge state board test that you May never take cause if my anxiety kills me . How do people have jobs with anxiety and depression ?

[argh52]

I share your pain of being older than everyone else at a similar stage in their careers b/c it took me ten years to get my bachelors. And then you judge yourself against them and even though it's not fair, it hurts.

[Hidden]

For me my job is an escape. I am a nurse and work in surgery so when I have to do the ultrasound during a big surgery I about die every time and get shaky and sweaty but I get through it somehow. I have to work so I have no choice.

[Michdau1 in reply to Hidden]

A job is my escape too xxx

[hypercat54]

It's not easy that's for sure. I managed to survive my working life but did change jobs quite a lot until I found one I quite enjoyed and could manage.

My last job though was in a call centre and I hated it with a passion. The customers weren't the problem but the routine and tagrets were horrible and negatively impacted my depression and I have never fully recovered. Awful managership and culture.

However you are not a failure. You are only that if you ever stop trying to be the best you that you can be. No one else can do you as well as you can and we are all unique, so can all be world beaters. x

[Michdau1 in reply to hypercat54]

The call centre you worked in sounds like the one I did for 9.5 years!!! It almost killed me (literally). It chipped away at my soul every day and I'm so glad to have escaped!!! Things defo can get better xxx

[hypercat54 in reply to Michdau1]

Wow good for you. I managed 5 years 4 months in mine before I was dismissed coz of taking time off with my depression. I knew it was killing me but had no choice if I wanted to get solvent again. It served it's purpose but at what cost?

I went back to education later too - at the age of 27 and know how hard it can be when most are younger. x

[Michdau1 in reply to hypercat54]

Well done 👍 another one with balls of steal 😘😘😘

[Michdau1]

First of all you had the balls of steal to go back to school at 36. That is soooooo brave and really inspiring. Well done. That's one heck of an achievement. Everything worth while takes a fight and your obviously a fighter 💪💪💪 my job is a lifeline for me. The distraction, the social aspects, the mental challenge and the achievements. The pay is the main reason tho lol!

[Dreamie]

First you’re not a failure. I know how easy it is to feel like one when we compare ourselves with what we think other people are. Comparison causes a lot of pain. And our worth definitely isn’t based on how we do at work or how much money we make. This may sound silly but when I am feeling worthless I think about the people who have loved me my whole life or for many years and I think of how imperfect I’ve been, because we all are, but these people still love me and think I have worth. And I love them too....they didn’t have to earn it or do anything special.

Generally speaking working keeps me “sane”. I don’t work high pressure jobs because I would hate them and my anxiety would be uncontrollable. Even with a job that I enjoy there are still days my anxiety is high. I have to push myself to get up and get to work many days. Sometimes I have to just keep going when I really want to run and hide. It helps if you have a positive person at work that makes you feel better just being in their company. I visit that person. I try and focus on the task at hand so that my anxious thoughts have to move to the background. I have had to change jobs that are too stressful. It wasn’t easy going through changes but in the long run worth it completely.

My anxiety can be just as at bad if I don’t work or even worse. For the most part work gives me a sense of purpose, breaks up my day so that I don’t become overly depressed and is often enjoyable.

What are you studying? What type of job are you doing or planning to do?

[Jax27 in reply to Dreamie]

It’s a state board for esthetics.

[Dreamie in reply to Jax27]

That sounds like it could be a nice and rewarding career for you. Perhaps you are extra stressed and anxious at the moment but will do better after the exam. I do know how debilitating anxiety can be. What are you doing to deal with it?

[Jax27]

Honestly I’ve been so depressed that it’s bed hard to focus . Been trying Day by Day ti get out of house for my kids and I want to get better . I’m thinking I will postpone my test

[JkBrauer]

Pray- Be still and know that I am God. Psalms 46:10