I hate wanting to do something but not being able to.

[DemureRose]

The worst part about anxiety for me is that I want to do things but I just can’t. Right now for example I’m on a big group vacation and what am I doing? Watching a movie alone in my room while the others act goofy. I tried to sit out there but it was too much stimulation and I felt out of place. I just couldn’t. But I want so badly to be involved! So badly!

[Hidden]

Leaving our comfort zones can be difficult and frustrating, especially when you're over stimulated. There are long term solutions, but it doesn't sound like you have time for those. I think you go out and enjoy the company and when you hit your stimulation limit, excuse yourself to go take a "breather"....and by breather, you're going to do deep breathing exercises for ten minutes. You will close your eyes, breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Pick one thing you notice the most about your breathing. Let's say, you feel it in your nose the most. So for five minutes, we're going to do nothing but breathe and think about how our nose feels as we breathe. Any noises, thoughts, or distractions are okay! We notice them, let them go, and return to the "thought" which is we can feel the air entering through our nose. Continue this for five to ten minutes breathing deep into your belly (diaphragm should go up) slowly. See how you feel afterwards. Are you ready to go back out to the party? No? Then let's try this....do the exact same thing breathing...and the thought of what you feel. We're going to do some tension exercises really quick. For each of these, you'll do them three times. Scrunch up your face really tight and hold for a couple of seconds and let go. Do you feel the tension/anxiety leaving? So, three of those. Then we're going to raise our shoulders inward up to our ears....holding and do it three times...again....noticing the tension and anxiety fading. Next we'll run through our back and notice any tension...stretch it out. Finally, we end with making a fist with each hand...and letting go...focusing on all the tension fading....and then the last is curling our toes backwards to stretch calf and foot muscles. Three times each, noticing our breath all the while, noticing the anxiety/tension fading. These are some of the best exercises for tension, stress, and anxiety. Go out and enjoy yourself and then make a "restroom break" where you do this....it can take 5-10 minutes...shorten the stretches down to 2 a piece if needed. You may find you're able to bring down the sensitivity to all the stimulation and won't need more than one run of this. Try it...I hate to hear someone missing out on a good time. Best of luck, feel better, and remember to have fun.

[JAYnLA in reply to Hidden]

I'm not in crisis and still enjoyed reading your great coaching. Thank you.

[explorerPHX in reply to Hidden]

I agree with JAYnLA. Very helpful.

[Muddypawz in reply to Hidden]

I love this! I took a screen shot do I can use it to prevent hitting my about to blow limit!

[JAYnLA]

I so relate to what you're saying. Lately I've been rephrasing it. "I can't do everything I want to do" has become "I can't do everything I want to do COMFORTABLY." It's making a difference to see it this way. Sometimes I'm up for the discomfort and sometimes I'm not - but I can do whatever the hell I want to do. So can you.

[explorerPHX]

I definitely know this feeling - wanting to do something and not being able to. You want to be included, to be involved, but something just gets in the way and you end up not.

[quitter333]

how can you accumulate experience to feel better next time, if you dont go and acquire even unfulfilling experience?

It's like same as "meeting girls 101" - you try few times, get rejected, and gain confidence to try new things and don't frear rejection anymore, until you hit the golden spot.

[Icanbeathis2016]

It's very difficult to watch others be themselves and we feel like we cant even do what we want to do or like how we use to. I would constantly feel sad because I didn't think I could engage in what I once could anymore. So I found myself isolating from the world, people, having fun, living. You are not alone.

I wish us the best

[Srivet4]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I know how you feel and I know how much it can hurt. My husband goes out swimming with his friends all the time but it makes me too nervous so I don't go even though I haven't swam In ages and I'd love to. I'm trying to take baby steps to get comfortable in public with people but it's a slow process. I often call and talk to my mom and we talk about going on vacations and that often cheers me up. Do you have someone supportive there to help you?