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Anxiety and Depression Support
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Paranoid feeling and going out tonight

Okay so some of my old friends I’ve known since Kindergarten - grade school some since college now we are in our 40s jand one of them actually has my exact same birth date...anyway I’ve been kinda paroniod lately in general like I constantly feel like someone is spying on me or watching over my shoulder to see how I’m doing things . It’s an unsettled restless feeling and I feel like pacing to go with my racing thoughts. I can’t seem to help the feelings/behaviors. I keep thinking someone will be really mean to me tonight when I go out. They are usually great though. A loooong time ago I would turn down fun nights sometimes because I was so depressed. Now it’s more of the anxiety. I am not even in the mood to go but I will. I HATE this F-ing feeling. 😠

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I'm not telling you what to do - that's up to you. But on the plus side, there's really no better tonic than to get out of the house for a few hours, and spend it with some old friends. Only you can decide whether you're "up for it". But if you are, I am sure you'll be very glad you went.

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True 🤗 you are great jkl!

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Star light, star bright.... 😔💫✨I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. I know what you mean about everything you said. I’ve been feeling that way too. In the wise words of mama anxiety, “be gentle with yourself today.” Normally I would encourage you to go, because it would be good for you, but I know how it feels for people to do that to me & I CANNOT go. Okay, so let’s see what will happen if you stay home: you’ll be missing your friends, maybe? You’ll still be paranoid. If you go: There’s a slight chance of something happening, but odds are in your favor that you’re going to be fine. You will have a fun time with your friends. You might have a laugh. You might feel amazing for a little bit after. It’s all up to you what you do, girlie! You know I’m with you no matter what! I’m here if you need me! Xoxoxo

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I’m going. I guess I just need to say how I feel like part of me is dreading something like you said of maybe something happening...thanks it helps so much that you understand the feelings.

Yeah I will laugh for sure and will feel good about going I bet. I’m just having a weird time over here.

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I know exactly how you feel. You know what? You’ve inspired me to see my friend today. I didn’t go yesterday, because I had a whirlwind of emotions at therapy, but because you’re going, I’m gonna see my friend Brandi for dinner. We can do this!!!! You have me anytime you need me. Xoxoxo

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Oh I just now saw this. Hope you had a great time out.

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hey go out and have a great night with your friends.put anxiety/depression/stress on the back burner for once.sounds like it could be a good night.

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Yeah. Thank you so much. I always have fun going out now but of course the way past pops up and makes me cringe.

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Go for it girl! Have fun. Send those uneasy feelings to the curb😁

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Yeah yeah I’m doing it! On my way out!

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💃

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Totally know what you mean.... I do hope you do try to go out. They sound like oldest & dearest friends... so I'm sure they get you & will have you laughing & smiling in no time. My therapist & group are always telling me to go out even when anxiety is being a monster. Sometimes it goes away... Sometimes not... but it always feels good to see my friends & get hugs. Love &hugs

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Awww 🥰 love and hugs to you my friend!!! Thank you so. True true I will get and give hugs and I’m determined to give good vibes those gorgeous people.

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As it turns out I am going to friend's tonight too... my anxiety is high today, don't know why. These are close friends & I adore their 2 kids. I am trying to focus on their smiles when they see Tickle Monster (their 5 y/o name for me). Let's show anxiety who's boss today.

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I'm going to my daughter's relatives house tonight for dinner. I like them but for some reason I get anxiety. I used to be a social person but have isolated myself since being a full time single father. I feel out of place and uncomfortable in my own skin.

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(((((((((( ❤️ hug ❤️)))))))) I know it can be hard I hope you have a good time!!!

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I hope dinner goes well. I feel the same way. I haven't even told our group of friends about my mental health. This is such a lonely disease. But we have people here who understand & are cheering us on. And bet your daughter will be so happy you went tonight. Hugs.

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How’d it go Marshall?

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It went good. Other people were doing most of the talking so that helped. My daughter got to hang with her cousins and she had a good time.

Thanks for asking.

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I feel you ever since I’m a single mom

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((((((Hug)))))

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It sounds as if you know this is not real. That is a good sign. You will most likely have a blast if you go. Even if there is a bump in the evening, you will still enjoy yourself. I would talk to your doctor about your paranoia. It seems like a medication adjustment may be needed.

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Oh yes my doc said next time we might because of it. But yeah I catch myself, I know reality it’s just like a slice of nonreality shoves it’s way in and I have to kick it out. Thank you so much I think I will be lovin’ the time with friends I’m feeling optimistic now.

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Starr,

Did you know the bible has much to say about negative feelings.

Proverbs 15:15 says "All the days of the afflicted one

are bad but

the one with a cheerful heart has a continual feast"

What does this mean? Seems

it's a matter of choosing to think

positive. Is it easy? Of course not! But when we realize most issues,

illness, things we worry about are simply out of our control, then

we must strive to take control of our thoughts & feelings.

Hope you go and enjoy your sweet self. Agape

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I'm sorry its difficult for you. I can't say I understand the paranoid part but the social anxiety I do understand. Let us know how it goes.

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It was fun!

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Yes, go. Usually our fears don't happen. If you're like me, you'll feel anxious until some point in your excursion, then everything is fine. For me, when I was on my way, the anxiety left. I've known others who don't feel comfortable until they are settled into the venue. But, the anxiety usually proves unfounded. If the anxiety is true, it is much less than feared; completely within our ability to handle. The best thing I've done to get me out the door is ask myself, "What would I feel like or do if I wasn't anxious?" Then I try to do just that. The anxiety doesn't go away, but it does diminish so I can get out the door.

Best wishes for your fun night. Let us know what you did!

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It was great! Thanks for your care and support my friend ❤️

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GREAT. So happy for you!

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Thanks now today is another matter ugh I’m so tired in my life something terrible happened to me in the middle of the night I’m so sickened and even devised a plan just in case I just get so desperate that I have to say to the suicidal ideation ok you win, I feel so angry at a loved one who harmed me and do tired of his bullshit. Sorry 😐 I’m so angry

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Please pm me. I'd like to help.

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I would suggest that you simply try going. It sounds to me like you would be (re-)connecting with people who know you for you...not for what is going on in your life currently.

(When I say simply it's only because I'm trying to remove the word "just" from my vocabulary. We live in a world where words can mean little or not what they're intended.)

I've had similar difficulties in my life for a while. I've found that my anxiety can be (at least) temporarily thwarted...for a few reasons:

- I can extricate myself from the situation...but don't know if I will need to do so. The fear of feeling that I won't be able to do so, or feel (worse!) obligated to remain even though I may not want to stay causes stress. I've often been surprised that the people who I'm inadvertently (/unknowingly) avoiding are some that are not interested in my (progress/) situation, but rather are interested me.

- I do avoid going conversationally deeper than I may want to go...but redirecting a conversation to things that I know to be commonalities.

- I don't have to say anything more about 'how life is going' currently. Keep it simple. Ask questions of others...being mindful of their boundaries. This works for several reasons, including getting to know more about the other(s) which can help to make you feel more comfortable with yourself. I say that knowing others want to put their best foot forward, but will listen to what they're saying. Sometimes listening to others, in what they say and what they don't say, will start to let some of your anxieties fall aside and let you feel that you can open up a little more than you felt you would want.

- The older I get, the more concerned I feel that I'm not where I expected/wanted to be. However, that doesn't mean that I'm disconnected from the world. If said individuals seem to have expectations (potentially) paralleling my own expectations of self...again, keep it simple. You may even find that hinting at working to do something (that is honest, but not overly exposing)...and simply that the 'something' is proving to be challenging, but "I'm working on it." [Think about working on your anxiety, run - past - it in your mind until you get to what you want to or are comfortable to express.]

"80% of Life Is Showing Up..." Woody Allen/Richard Rogers

I've found that notion to be one of the most helpful things to allow myself to think, "F*** it" and just go. Show up and see what happens. Leave if you don't want to stay. At least you got there. In return, you may well find that seeing familiar faces may give you reason to want to stay.

I hope that doesn't sound glib. It comes from personal experience.

Best of wishes to you...

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Thanks for your thoughtful response LetMeBe!! I had a good time.

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That's awesome to hear that you enjoyed it! Being unnerved about it sucks (to put it mildly). I'm glad that you showed up...let the other 20% decide when you feel like heading out. :)

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Any meetings in NJ for this

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What kind of meetings?

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Anxiety or depression

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Oh best to you in finding the meetings you need.

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