Sometimes its just nice to reflect(also 11 months without cutting)

[CJ2016]

To stand in the garden and look up at the sky, and just reflect a little, for those moments everything feels at peace, mind at peace body at peace, soul at peace.

Also it makes me wonder the type of views people had 100s of years ago when they did not have other houses around them no street lights etc.

As much as i would love to see other parts of the world, cant help but still love my little (welsh)valley.

Also its been around 11 months since i last picked up a blade to sh.

And two weeks ago i had a tattoo to start covering up the scars on one arm, hoping to turn it into a half sleeve,just need to think of ideas to keep within the theme.

Cant aay the urges to cut again ever go away because they dont, but it becomes a bit easier to ignore those urges over time.

[Catwoman2018]

Hello and first of all, I'd like to say well done for staying strong all that time and not cutting! Also, getting tattoo to cover scars, will never take away the pain but will help you to move forward and feel more confident. I know what you mean about looking up at the sky, I did that last night, looking up at the stars and feeling very peaceful, imagining all the other places across the world and who else looking up too. So calming.

[CJ2016 in reply to Catwoman2018]

Yeah getting the tats will never stop the urge,the main purpose of going for the tats is not to feel paranoid in the summer when its to hot to wear a hoody.

Somedays the urge to cut is stronger then others, but i try to keep my self occupied long enough for it to pass.

And yeah looking up at the sky is very peaceful, also makes you feel like an ant.

[fauxartist]

congratulations and also a great idea getting a tattoo.... was also wondering what other coping mechanisms your using to help....are you doing art, therapy....writing....

[CJ2016 in reply to fauxartist]

Hey faux thanks, i was doing exercise but im giving my self some freedom from that to indulge is some nice food for christmas, but more often or not i just game a lot(play online games mostly).

Or ill go out and clean the car or clean the house,basically something to keep my hands busy.

Listen to music, will end up spending hours on youtube going through songs.

Anything and everything thats not too much of a damaging distraction.

[AZ1970]

Good for you! You need to be very proud of yourself.

[CJ2016 in reply to AZ1970]

Thanks its crazy to think its almost been a year, its gone quick.