Hi all: I'm really sad today so... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Hi all

I'm really sad today so depressed and down on myself. Went to our church x-mas carols last night and 2 of my kids came with me, 16 and 18. It was so good, I was excited we were going, had a great time, started tearing up when it was time to go as had to take my son home to his dads; he recently moved in with him ; which was what threw me into this depression because his dad( my husband) has been in and out of lives for20 years was abusive and rarely ever there emotionally for me and our children. Anyway when I started to cry a very close friend of mine had a very stern talk to me ; told me to keep it together and remember how lucky I am to have my kids there. I feel so stupid so down on myself, I feel so ungrateful and am wondering if all of this is my fault, like I've got to just pull myself up by the boot straps and get my self together. I feel useless and just want to isolate myself from all my support and tell them I'm doing fine now, maybe they're getting sick of me . It's shaken me up and I just want to hide away I feel so stupid so unworthy. I was starting to want to do things again that make me happy, like organising x-mas, cooking, cleaning ......but now I hate myself and feel that I've done all this to myself. won't be many years til my daughter moves out and I'll be left with no purpose. It feels like my family of 6 has gone to a family of 1 ; just me

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You are special like we all are. Please find a way to give of yourself to something outside your family. You can do so much good.

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Thankyou for replying, I have wrapped my whole life around my family, and it hasn't been easy there's been so many things that were unavoidable, one son has Tourette's and lots of difficulties , loads of judgment with that one ,and the list goes on. Maybe I could try doing something myself that I like . It feels purposeless but I can try it . Thankyou

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I think it is so important to give yourself permission to do things away from your family. You need this !

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They've been my whole life for so long, someone told me to do that when I had my first child and it's always stuck in my head so that's what I've done. Thankyou so much, I will try it ❤️

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The key to being happy is knowing you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.

Don't let the silly little things steal your happiness.

There is no cosmetic for beauty life happiness.

The secret of being happy is accepting where you are in life and making the most out of everyday.

With each rise of the sun, you get to chase the opportunity to fill your days.

With meaning—to live your life the way you choose.

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Thankyou, I think you're right. Still hurting though, my younger daughter just emptied my sons room so she can move into it , against my wishes, as I think he may want to come home soon but she is pretty angry I didn't let her do it straight away , don't want to lose her either though so im just hiding in my room and letting her do it . Devastated, my hope is slipping away

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I wish, I could do more to help u. Can u do deep breathing exercise to relax your body or meditation. Am praying for u and sending u a big hug 🤗 and positive vibes and energy your way

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Thankyou tamka, very much appreciated. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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You’re very welcome. I really want u to feel better. And am here for u you’re not alone we all have a story and a battle we fight everyday. It don’t make u weaker it makes u strong. I believe in you and I know this should pass.❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Thankyou tamka, Thankyou everyone !!!! Your kind words are keeping me going. Much love to all of you , it helps so much to talk to people who really understand ❤️

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U right, and am here for you

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Hi tamka, I just wanted to say to you I'm so grateful for all your encouragement to me and everyone else. How are you ? I really hope you are finding peace in your days. Lots of hugs and love to you , you're not alone in this battle either!!! Congrats on going so many days without alcohol, you're a champion. I use alcohol too to ease the pain and I'm trying not to as well , still have days when I do but mostly I just will myself to not buy any when I'm at the shops, not easy because it makes me feel better but I am getting there . Heaps and heaps of love to you and Thankyou again😘😘😘😘😘

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You’re very welcome, When am feeling bad is best for me to reach out and help other people. Who is hurting to get out of my own head. And right now am very low and am tired but, I must keep fighting and never give up. And I want u to know I appreciate you too. And u deserve to be happy. And am here for u whenever u need me. Am praying for you. You can message me your first name so when praying I can say your name. Keep reaching out and please keep me updated on your progress

Love&Hugs 😘😘😘😘😘😘😘

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I am praying for you too, you have a beautiful and giving heart that's for sure . You give so much love here and I want you to take love back as well !!! I like to say the persons name too when I'm praying, but was worried that was too personal for some. My name is Hayley. Much love to you and im praying for healing and happiness for all of us here 😘😘😘😘😘

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I feel your pain. It’s real. I’m sorry that many people who mean well, forget or do not realize that depression is an illness that is very difficult to live with. Your words/thoughts you sent to me were a comfort. Thank you kindly. I suffer with exascerbated depressive/anxiety disorders with several panic attacks a day (does not take much to trigger them), and then to be told to pull it together, stop whining and many other things and in very condescending tones, makes me want to hide or isolate myself. Instead of loved ones or people who call themselves friends, reaching out in kindness, some so often tend to intentionally or not, put us down for our painful condition. I’m sorry that was your experience. Today I got on my knees begging for God’s help as for the past 4 years i deal with this condition of dread and depression everyday. I hope and pray that you will experience some comforting from a friend or loved one. Sometimes we have to just wrap our arms around ourselves and quiet our minds with thoughts of peace. or thoughts of happier times (past enjoyable events and good things you envision for your future).

Peace

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Thankyou so so much, I'm so sorry for your pain, but it's helps to know there's people out there who truly understand what it's like. If we could just pull ourselves out of it we wouldn't we just do it, no one wants to feel like this, if I could just pull myself up I most certainly would. I was getting so much better but after being told to pull it together it's sent me right back , I feel so embarrassed and ashamed right now , and just want to tell my friends and and family I'm all better so they don't see me like this . I know I will get there so I'm holding onto hope still. I've been on my knees many many times begging god to help me too. I will pray for you , let's keep hope ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Don't allow one person's opinion to be your reality. I wonder if the abuse left you with trauma? He is triggering you and you go to unhealthy thoughts about yourself. I have been divorced for almost 5 years and I still cannot handle much contact with my ex. I do that to protect my sanity. I understand you have kids and contact is necessary. Maybe build yourself up with positive affirmations? You won't believe them at first, but keep at it. It does start to change your brain.

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I was always generally a happy person so I think the years of abuse may have affected me, just started seeing a psychologist. I don't understand what's wrong with me , I still want my husband to come home, he seems to have changed a lot and told me he still loves me. I can't imagine being with anyone else , it would feel so strange after 20 years of marriage. I'm so confused and so lost and just want to do the right thing by everyone, I fear losing people if I don't do whatever they want me to do

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You must do what you want to do. Get quiet with yourself. Journal. Pray or meditate. Don’t make a decision for someone else.

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Hello, Thankyou so much for your reply and encouragement. I spend so much of my time pleasing other people and trying to always do the "right thing" but I get so confused sometimes on what that is , I guess I'm really over thinking everything! I think I really may have to limit my contact with my ex. I always come away feeling worse.

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You are allowed to have a down day, a day of crying. I think it's good for the soul just as long as it doesn't become a way of life. Even Jesus wept when troubled over Jerusalem. Now go ahead and enjoy Christmas giving praise to God for all things in your life. Have a blessed Christmas!

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Hey froggymum, Thankyou do much, very wise words , you're all lifting my spirits and I will try to enjoy Christmas as much as I can . Praying for everyone in our group that you all may have some hope and some happiness over Christmas 😘😘😘😘

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Thankyou!!!!! I will look that up, thanks for taking that risk for me, that's amazing you would do that , but I don't think you'll get blocked , we all pray for each other on here. Thankyou so so much . I will definitely do that ❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Just listened to some of what he has to say, already feeling hope ❤️

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I so hope you're not blocked!!!Cannot thank you enough, this could be the answer I've been waiting for. My sister told me there has been freemasonry too in our family history and has some understanding of the spiritual ramifications. God bless and Thankyou.

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Oh and I thought it was sabio msging me about Derek prince if there's any confusion. I'm not good on the internet and technology, I lll get someone to show me when I can. I'm all over the place ,I see a post and reply 😄

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Thankyou!You too x

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I prayed out loud , full of hope ❤️

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Oh yey!!! So glad.I listened to some of Derek prince; I'm out of internet at the moment but I had an amazing night/morning with son and his rebellion. I feel god is telling me it's not too late to discipline him, it's working, I stood my ground this morning with him, it was really bad, but he's backed down and it's working. Who would've thought I can still do that at his age of 20. I declared in the name of Jesus he is healed. So hopeful for his future, it's caused me tremendous stress , but I have hope now for him and my depression too

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It is never too late to make changes. Trust in God and move forward. Merry Christmas.

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