Does anyone else feel like they have wasted their life by worrying about dying so much that they don't live? I am afraid that I have cancer. Let me rephrase that... I am afraid I have cancer running rampant through my entire body.
Every day it is something different. Throat cancer, brain cancer, breast cancer, colon cancer, ovarian cancer, lymphoma... the list goes on and on. Then it circles back to the beginning...
Help.
Written by
Roulette21
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Yes I feel like too much of my life is wasted on worrying. For me, it seems that the worry is related to not having control. I have bouts of worrying about health to the point I’ve considered buying life insurance. Since I joined this forum, I’ve read suggestions from others about accepting my worries and I find that approach helpful. I’ve also found the content on the website anxietycoach.com helpful.
Thanks for sharing your feelings. I think venting these thoughts to others is healthy.
In many ways I have a very similar issue. Essentially I don’t worry about my personal health enough, and I worry TOO much about others health. This is debilitating for sure! One of my major issues is that I’m letting things just “pass me by” as a result, so I hear exactly what you’re saying.
How are you feeling so far today? If you’re not well is there anything you can do RIGHT NOW to get your mind off of possible sickness?
mild intestinal upset. but of course I think it is something related to cancer. I had a colonoscopy in May and that was fine. I've had MRI's of my head and brain. I thought I had colorectal cancer. I thought I had throat cancer. I thought I had breast cancer. the list goes on and on...
Unfortunately some people do get these terrible illnesses and there's nothing to say that any of us are immune, but to focus in on it so much and to such a great extent i would say that is an anxiety symptom. Does it trace back to the colonoscopy? It can be difficult to rid these thoughts from your head but best thing is to go with the medical testing and if they say you are all clear then just thank goodness that you are as there are those who are not. Me too I now worry about dying differently from how I did before. Before I constantly felt close to death in a depressed sort of way. Now I am feeling better I actually don't want to die anymore and i just hope and pray that i DON'T get a terrible physical disease right now as I really want to carry on and have a few good years ( I have just hit 60 but am very young for my age and in pretty good shape physically though mentally suffered a lifetime of abuse which finally ended 4 years ago)
Roulette21, feeling that you have all kinds of cancers when you have anxiety disorder is perfectly normal. It's a very common reaction to anxiety and you're no different to thousands of other people.
You've had lots of tests and scans to rule out cancer and it gives temporary reassurance - then the old cancer obsession reasserts itself somewhere else. We've all been there.
Everybody is slightly concerned about cancer: everywhere you look on TV, internet news, papers and magazines there are stories about it. But most people don't stress and obsess about it. Those of us with anxiety disorder do for one very good reason.
Our nervous systems have become over sensitised by stress, worry, overwork, trauma, loss or grief. And over-sensitised nerves exaggerate ten times our normal concerns and blow them up into never ending obsession.
For some reason your mind has chosen cancer as the obsession, it could have been all sorts of other things like an exaggerated fear of losing your job or being involved in a major car crash.
Everytime you get an ache it has to be cancer rather than a strained muscle or stomach bug.
Other times your jangled nerves will imitate cancer like feeling you have a lump in your throat: another common anxiety symptom called 'Globus Hystericus', I had it years ago.
The trouble is, every time we imagine we have some fresh cancer symptom we release fear hormones which help to keep our sensitised nerves further sensitised. It's a vicious circle of fear causing symptoms causing more fear causing more symptoms.
If you could stop being fearful of these episodes of 'cancer' you would stop bombarding your nervous system with the hormones that maintain the sensitisation.
Of one thing you can be sure: your chances of dying of cancer are the same as everybody else and when you recover from your anxiety disorder this cancer obsession will disperse like the early morning mist at sunrise.
I hope that you overcome your exaggerated fears and that you recover your quiet mind once more.
Yes I guess I waste my life worrying quite a lot ☹️
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