Depressed

[Shortstuf]

I am not sure what to say I already feel like shit and I am realizing my husband is watching porn again bc he isn't having sex with me , what am I doing why am I wasting my life I am ready to be happy again

[Hidden]

Wow. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. Have you talked to your husband about what he is doing? You have to fight for you..why? Because there is only one you! Put yourself first, know how special you are, please! I'm here for you. Love, peace, light, joy & hugs!!!

[Shortstuf in reply to Hidden]

This has been going on for a long time he says that he isn't watching it and then I found out the truth and it hurts bc it males me ask myself if I am good enough for him 😢

[Hidden in reply to Shortstuf]

Have you asked him why he is lying? XXX

[Shortstuf in reply to Hidden]

Yes and he keeps saying that he isn't doing it , it just hurts to know I have been with someone for 15 years and this is how I am done

[littleorange8 in reply to Shortstuf]

i’m sorry this happened to you. do you have proof (it’s better if you do)?you could show that to him to call him out on watching porn AND lying. i think the most hurtful thing is that he lied to you. i have been in this situation too

[Shmelany]

Wasting your life? I know what ever anyone says you will do what you head tells you! Porn is not always a bad thing, what type is he watching? And if your not having sex together, i believe it is better to masturbate alone than to have sex with someone that isn’t your partner! Porn is no where near as big of a betrayal than cheating! Talk to him, tell him how it makes you feel when he hides it from you, would you feel any different if he was honest about it?

Self care is very important, take a break, do something just for you each day or once a week. but we mustn’t forget those around us, when we suffer anxiety attacks they suffer too! I know i am a mega bitch to anyone close to me when i am having an attack!

Take care x

[littleorange8 in reply to Shmelany]

i think the problem is that he lied to her about not watching porn

[Shortstuf in reply to littleorange8]

Yes but it won't change nothing he will stock to lying

[Shmelany in reply to littleorange8]

Being Lied to sucks but beating yourself up thinking someone is lying to you consistently is mentally worse. Been there done that and ended up a frail emotional wreck. It takes time to heal and trust again but it will happen!

You never know he may have lied thinking it would be better for her mental healtg by not saying anything. My OH used to not tell me things thinking it was making it easier for me,when he now knows it is totally the opposite. Men do weird shit.

[Stilltrying_]

Most men and many women watch porn (in my humble opinion). As another poster said it isn't exactly the same as cheating as most people would be cheating!!! (men in particular) It really depends how bad the habit is. Is he doing it six times a day and obsessed by it or just now and then? And then also your attitude towards this. If this is something you don't want him to do then you do have the right to say that but being honest most people will lie as in my opinion on the whole it's quite a harmless activity and just a physical release whereas a relationship is built on far more than that. Just being honest. G x

[Hidden]

I think your concerns are legitimate and any woman in your situation would feel the same way. Have you tried couples therapy? Maybe your husband has anxiety issues? He might have an impulsive disorder.

[Taylorsunshine]

I wonder if he is hiding it from you because he is ashamed of watching it ? I've been married 20 years & my hubby has been watching it lately as well. I've had a failed back surgery which causes me now to have severe sciatica pain & recently I partially dislocated my knee. Needless to say we can't be together as much as we used to be. I'm ok with him watching it because I would rather have him do that than go outside of our marriage. Now lately he has been turning it on while we are together...I would rather not have to listen to it but I know that I have to pick & choose my battles & I chose to just let this one go. Best of luck to you & I hope you two can work this out 💜💚

[crowningglory19]

I'm so sorry! It sucks! But such things are beyond our control. All we can do is be the best we can and either move on or let go of caring about it or we drive ourselves crazy. Go out and do what you want to do, if he loves you he will follow. Be busy about what you want, a man loves a chase, don't be too available, he might wonder what he's missing. Pray that he will be stopped or learn to hate it.