Need Advice...

[catsandcoffee]

For those of you who struggle with depression and also have a significant other who struggles with depression/anxiety, I need advice. I’ve been going through a dark time lately and so has my husband. We’ve been fighting so much lately cause we’re both sensitive. I don’t know how to support him while also feeling supported...Anything that you do with your SO that has helped connect you or understand each other’s feelings better?

[MariaLove123]

Oh wow when both people in the relationship have mental illness, it can be so hard because you want to be there for each other but yet, you are having trouble even helping yourself! You both need your own therapists. Are you guys on medication? My fiancé and I both have anxiety but I have very bad depression too. I hate when I can’t be strong enough to be there for him. But he started lexapro and klonopin and is a total different person. You guys hold onto that love right now. This is a bump in the road and you’ll figure out how to balance things out better. Sometimes both having the same issue can also be good because you don’t feel alone and you can cry together. But more importantly, come up with ways to talk openly and honestly. I hope things get better 🤗

[catsandcoffee in reply to MariaLove123]

Thank you. We are both on medication and I have a therapist I see regularly. My husband has had bad experiences with therapists so he isn’t seeing one now but it’s something we both know he needs. I’m just glad to know there’s at least one person out there who understands. Thanks for the encouragement💖

[MariaLove123 in reply to catsandcoffee]

You’re so welcome! I’m always here if you want to talk. I’m glad you’re seeing a therapist. It’s probably nice to talk about the situation at home. And he’ll find the right one. For now, hopefully you guys can come to a compromise and understanding that you’re both going through this and fighting is making it worse. You do the best you can with just being there for each other. Maybe when you’re home together, watch tv or a movie so you don’t always have to talk and you can snuggle 🤗

[lovetodance2018]

I have been in a similar situation in the past with my husband. We both have struggled with depression and anxiety and often have difficulty communicating with one another. We first learned we need to respect each other. That means how we talk to each other should be in love. We learned many times we need to take a break before interacting and give time to cool down or just stop and pray. That really helps me collect my thoughts. Otherwise we react and that only leads to things escalating. When things are frustrating and you are feeling depressed it is really hard to think clearly and interact. We watched this great video by Mark Gungor called Laugh Your Way To A Better Marriage. I highly recommend you and your husband watch it together. It teaches about our differences and how to learn to respect each other and interact in love. bit.ly/2pcLRm6 Another option is to consider marriage counseling. Sometimes we need a third party to help see each others perspective and learn strategies on how to do that as a couple. I will be keeping you in my prayers. My husband and I have been married for almost 30 years and we still are learning ways to improve our communication and interaction. Please keep in touch. God Bless.