Thank you to anyone who is kind enough to offer their perspective, advice, well wishes, or just your time to read this.
My ex & I broke up about 3 weeks ago. I’m in my late twenties & have only been in a few committed relationships. I’ve never fell so hard. I was hesitant at first b/c I thought it was too good to be true. He was so patient & told me I was worth the wait & he’d be there whenever I was ready. I finally realized this man makes me so happy & treats me like a Queen.
Six months in, I moved. He found a job in the same city & moved in a couple months later. I was worried b/c we hadn’t been together long, but he was perfect. Made dinner, cleaned, massaged my feet after a long day, & just so attentive & caring (also, the best sex of our lives for the both of us). My job involves traveling so I can be gone for 4-5 days at a time working 60-80 hrs/week. The stress of work consumed me. I could no longer control my anxiety/depression. I blew the tiniest things out of proportion & became so nit picky about everything.
I was a horrible gf. He did everything to try & help me. I finally confessed to him in June about my mental health. My erratic behavior now made sense to him. He insisted I get help. I refused. I assured him I would try to take better control of it. I didn’t. I let work take priority over my relationship & my own well being. Come the end of August, he was emotionally drained. I don’t blame him. I’d get so frustrated with myself b/c I knew I was wrong, but I just couldn’t stop. To make it worse, I’m horrible about apologizing.
I recently purchased a house, moved back to our hometown (unrelated to breakup), tore a ligament in my right foot & went on short term disability. I have a new house & now I can barely pay bills until I heal. I fell apart. This ultimately led him to the decision to break up, understandably.
This was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I was officially at my lowest. I secluded myself crying nonstop, didn’t get out of bed, didn’t eat, ignored all calls/texts. I finally scheduled an appt. I was put on WB. It’s only been 2 weeks, but overall I feel better than I have since I can remember. There’s this newfound clarity. I’m no longer thinking/acting based off emotion.
I’ve talked to him since starting treatment & he’s glad I finally got help. But the damage has been done. He said he was 50/50 on if he wanted to keep trying & that I deserved somebody who’d give 100. I asked him if he thought we would’ve worked out if I got help sooner. He was confident we’d be happy b/c we are 100% compatible in every other aspect, the arguments were just unbearable. I’ve apologized & taken full responsibility for my actions.
Should I give him time to emotionally heal & try again or just move on? I’m not the type of person to have regrets, but I can’t help but feel breaking up was a mistake. When things were good, we were the happiest we’d ever been. He said he could be making the biggest mistake of his life b/c I’m the “whole package”, his “dream girl”, & he still loves & cares about me. He says only time will tell, he just seems so over it.