So I just started receiving treatment for depression about 8 months ago after struggling for many years... I am in therapy and I am on medication that seems to be helping however I am still having panic attacks every now and then.
Just the other day I had one for the first time in a while. I thought I was doing a lot better since I hadn't had one but I broke my streak cause boom out of nowhere I felt like I knew it was coming but I tried to take deep breaths but I was at work very stressed out and the people I was working with weren't making it much easier on me either. Since I'm a waitress, it was hard to stop what I was doing to sit down and try to calm down since we were pretty busy. I walked to the back in tears and told my manager I needed some fresh air and asked him to please watch my table and I would be right back.
I got outside and I was shaking, hyperventilating and I could not hardly catch my breath. I started sobbing which only made it worse and I was trying really hard to pull myself together to go back inside and so I went back inside and people started asking "what's wrong?" and I got choked up again and had to settle myself down again. I was still very shaky and trying my hardest to play it cool at work but as soon as I left for my lunch break all I could do was sit in my car and cry.
I feel awful and I feel stupid that it happened at work ... I was outside sobbing, shaking, trying to catch my breath, feeling like my throat was tight and breathing was difficult and nobody even bothered to come out there to check to see if I was ok ...
I don't really want my coworkers to think I'm being irrational or over dramatic but I tried to explain that it just happens sometimes when I am stressed, feeling under pressure or uncomfortable and when work gets hectic and people are being rude rather than trying to be understanding of me it makes me feel worthless.
I was supposed to go back to work after all of this once I got off break but I called and said I needed to take the night off to try to get it together and relax. I feel like people will probably have something bad to say about me or might even say that I am dramatic, it seems that the people I work with don't care how it makes me feel when they act passive aggressive towards me as if trying to handle depression was hard enough, the last thing I need right now is my work environment to bury me even deeper.
Thanks for listening...
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katiebug12
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26 Replies
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The medication will definitely help with the physical reactions, but the mental stuff is up to you. It all takes time and practice. Has your therapist recommended CBT or anything like that?
It will help you Katie. It's a slow process to rewire your brain, but it will work so stick with it!
Hey Katie, my first panic attack was at work I dropped everything and went to the hospital. Now that I know it is a panic attack I know that i can’t run away, it’s better to stay and let it pass. You did the best thing and went outside for a while, but calling out the rest of the night just sets you up for fear the next time. So, it’s important that when you get your next panic attack at work that you deal with it and stay. Do not leave because this just will reinforce the panic attacks to keep coming. It’s a learning process. I started getting panic attacks at 22 and I’m 39 now. Lots of years of experience with major panic attacks at work. It happens, and it sucks, but you can get through it.
Has any of the meds helped with depression anxiety or panic attacks?? I started lexapro on August 17 first 10 mg and on sept 4 my doc raised to 20 mgs. I feel it’s starting to help I am not completely cure from my anxiety but I hope and pray it helps I also have been avoiding a lot of stuff. I stated this mess because of work but I still go to work and have been trying real hard to stay positive and do as much even though there is days I feel exhausted I only sleep about 5 to 6 hours a day. Hang in there pray and keep a journal that helps
Thank you both for responding and giving me your advice.. I did realize once I had decided to go home after my panic attack at work made me feel a bit more beat up over the fact that once again mental illness makes every day life more difficult than it has to be.
If you are taking lexapro and don't think it's working after a month then i'd consider switching to something else. I took lexapro too, started at 10mg then got my dose upped to 20mg and it wasn't working for me either. I now take effexor and it seems to be working for the most part for me thus far.
Great advice. In very many ways, fear(anxiety) and panic attacks are a form of “ addiction “. The more attention you pay to it, the more they will demand from you—it sets up a downward vicious cycle with no end. Think positive thoughts, hug yourself, and in no uncertain terms tell the anxious thoughts to “ bud off “ , and then don’t pay anymore attention to it. It’s like going “ cold turkey “ with the addiction.
lynnalice, question for you cuz I just started experiencing this at work. Does your boss know you suffer from panic attacks? Do they make accommodations for you? I'm a new manager and I'm about to ask for a demotion. Anything but management!
Yes but I’m at a place where anxiety and panic are common, it’s a rehab center. My boss understands although I really would not want to have a panic attack and need accommodations. She would likely understand though.
I'm sorry this happened to you at work. I had my first severe panic attack at work also. I was scared for several months and I'm not going to lie I still am. But I face it head on. And I meditate and pray. Hope you feeling alot better.
I have such a hard time reading these kinds of stories because they remind me of the time in my own life when I too battled panic disorder. I was an emotional train wreck most of the time, and in my own personal situation, I was driven to uncover the real reason I felt this way, until one day, these fears left my life for good.
I am thinking it may have been better that your coworkers did not approach you during your moment of stress, because it could have compounded the situation, placing another layer of self-consciousness upon your already fragile emotions. It's never comfortable when our shame sneaks out from behind the veneer of "everything-is-ok" we hold up for others to see, so maybe it spared you the awkwardness and they probably would not have known what to do anyway. I understand the importance of having someone show they care, but in this situation, a phone call later on would allow you both time to talk about the incident.
I agree that many times people don't know how to respond to a person with this kind of need in their life. Panic never announces its arrival, and takes a person off guard when they least expect it. And there you are stuck.
I have done much research on this topic and learned just how many factors come into play when trying to discern what is happening and why. God created your mind, body, soul, and spirit to work in unison, and when one compartment is hurting, they all hurt, magnifying the intensity of the problem.
Can I pray for you?
Lord, I pray for my friend now who has stepped out and revealed a struggle that just won't seem to go away, and has interrupted her life in such a way, that it's causing more unwelcome burdens and stress. I pray you will begin to lead her and guide her to the answers she needs to realize why fear grips her life the way it does. You are an all-wise God who knows us all better than we know ourselves, and I ask you now to show my friend what she can do to remove this horrible panic from her mind. With you God, all things are possible, and I ask you to wrap your love around her heart, and let her know you are with her. I pray she will find peace, a peace that only you can give. Amen.
Thank you so much for the encouraging words to me. I appreciate it.
I see that it may have been a good thing I was able to go outside and try to calm myself down without anyone out there to allow me to feel they may be judgmental of me. I still felt very embarrassed that it happened at work and I am hoping that they are understanding but I guess not everyone can always be understanding of mental illness.
I would love to pray for you. It's always an honor to go before the throne of God in our time of need - He is the great provider, and can do for us what we can't do for ourselves.
Lord, thank you that your ears are always attentive to our cries for help. Thank you that you are mindful of all of our ways, and no detail escapes your watchful eye. I pray for my friend who is reaching out for help and guidance. I pray you will begin to make your presence known to them - in the big ways and little ways. I pray you will intervene in their circumstances and allow them to see that with you on their side, there is nothing to fear.
I pray you will orchestrate events in their life that prove just how much you care. I pray you bring the right people into their life that can minister to them, teach them, listen to the, encourage them, and support the. You use other people in our lives to reveal your love for us, so I thank you for all will do in this person's life. I pray their heart will recognize who you are in every situation, and use everything that happens as a means to draw them closer to you. We trust you now, in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
I hope things are better. I'm in a similar situation and im still trying to figure out how to deal with it. I also know what it feels like to have other people viewing you in that way, it really sucks...Are things better?
Thanks for understanding. Sometimes the hardest thing about it is feeling like nobody understands. Its hard to talk about it when these things happen, and its also hard for me to be comfortable talking to people about those situations .... but some days have been better than others and I guess thats all part of this recovery process.
It's ok. Your illness is not going to pick & choose where it f*÷*s with you. Your poor overwhelmed mind decided to turn on you at the worst possible moment.
One thing I learned the very hardest way is that "What other people think of you is none of your business. They are entitled to their own opinion."
The reason your coworkers didn't come out there was probably due to the fact that when they tried to ask what happened, which they're maybe trying to be helpful, you really fell apart! Plus they had to work & they were one person short.
What I did in a similar situation was talk to a couple managers and even a couple of coworkers & told them I had mental issues (in my case it was ADHD, depression & anxiety), which were being monitored & treated by professionals.
I don't know if you are in a position to do this, but in the U.S. mental illness is getting the attention it deserves & I could have gone to the H.R. dept, filed a complaint that even though I told them I was having issues, they continued to be biased & made things super hard for me.
Here's the thing. I was protecting myself. They did try to really challenge me but I knew I was going out for a surgery, so I did nothing. I was so grateful to get out of there. I had been there 20 years, but they treated me like a bad kid!
So, good luck and I'm sure that you'll get through this without losing your dignity. If anyone thinks different then Shame On Them!
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