Struggling mom

[nrubio2016]

Every night I go to bed and I say I’ll be better for them tomorrow and it never happens

I struggle with coping with my divorce and failing to give them a family like the rest of my siblings have

[Marshall64]

Sorry to hear that struggling with your divorce. It is tough especially with kids.

I'm a full time single father and it is hard not to look at other families when your doing things yourself. It is natural to want the best for your kids. As long as you can be there as a supportive caring mom then things will be okay.

[nrubio2016 in reply to Marshall64]

Thank you

[fauxartist]

you don't get much time to grieve and deal with this incredibly difficult issue of divorce when you have to keep the home fires burning and all the kids who are also effected in some way happy as you can. I found my partner when through and is still going through a certain amount of guilt of how the divorce had effected their kids. But I will tell you this, they are surviving better than my partner as they are getting spoiled rotten. So if you can try to remember that you are suffering too and unless you get help, it won't get better very soon....give yourself a break.... your hurting.... and your doing your best. What most people don't understand is that going through your average divorce is like experiencing a death.... it's that serious. So try to work something out where you can have an hour or two to get some help... counselling... group help... any kind of positive support for you. It will help also with dealing with the kids through this if your feeling better.

I do understand this first hand.... and it's not easy... it's hard.... but your not alone here.

[Rowand]

I'm really sorry that you are having to go through the hardships and heartbreaks that divorce causes. I had 3 little ones when I had to get a divorce and I was the first in my family that this happened to. How I remember those times. You will be ok. It will take time but you and your children will survive this. Focus on the important things, such as letting your kids know how much you love them. You don't have to be perfect just be yourself. Having a loving mom during a storm really helps. Please don't try to judge yourself or your family by other families. Every family has its struggles and problems even it if doesn't show to others. There is a really good group of articles about this at bit.ly/2zXOgcF. It might give you some ideas or just some comfort knowing that you are not the only parent dealing with divorce. I certainly made a lot of mistakes and at times I felt like a total failure, but I and my kids have come through this a lot stronger and healthier. I found counseling a real help during my journey through divorce, and it even helped me in helping my kids. Perhaps that is something you could consider. Take care and keep moving forward.

[nrubio2016]

Thank you all for your responses and encouragement. After an enlightening therapy session the grieving process is slowly progressing. I really am only mourning the loss of the illusion of the marriage I wanted not really the one I had. Depression is never easy and when it is combined with these life events it is almost unbearable.