Am I being just wimpy?: I haven't... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Am I being just wimpy?

Maya-
Maya-

I haven't suffered any traumatic event, thanks God I have a wonderfull childhood and there are to many things that I should be thankful. One of them is the opportunity of studying a PhD abroad. It was something that I really wanted and I knew it wasn't going to be easy but, now my dream has become my nightmare, the stress and loneliness are killing me. What is wrong with me?

13 Replies

I don't think there is anything wrong with you. It could be you being overwhelmed or minor depression. I mean I don't know cause I don't know you but I can relate in my own way. I had an ok childhood. I come from a divorced family, me moving around a lot, A step mother who was a bitch to me 75% of the time and a mother was is about the same but they are both changing and my step mother isn't even my step mother anymore. I like to think my childhood has a neglected childhood. I am doing ok in school and am studying to me a children's cancer doctor and going to go into the military which are my dreams but I suffer from major depression and minor anxiety. I'm also slightly paranoid someone is watching me. But I don't think there is anything to wrong with me so I don't think there is anything wrong with you but just how you are feeling. Hope things get better. :)

~Sky

Maya-
Maya- in reply to Midnightwolf1

I know is all in our heads! It just I can control my anxiety and the negative thoughts, those "shoulds", my insecurities, the need to be in control and perfect, the fear to fail.

Midnightwolf1
Midnightwolf1 in reply to Maya-

Maybe it is and maybe it isn't in our heads. I know how you feel about all of that. The need to be perfect and accepted with no fail. I get it, eventually everything will even it self out and it won't be so hard, Just keep going and don't give up. I'm sure you can make it through :)

gogogirl
gogogirl in reply to Maya-

Who told you to be perfect? No one is perfect- most of all some of our politicians!

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Midnightwolf1

Are you under a doctors care?

Maya-
Maya- in reply to Hidden

I can't afford it. That type of treatments are only covered by my insurance if I uses the university well center. The problem is I'm living outside campus, in a research station in the middle of no where. Just to get an idea the nearest convenience store is 1 hora away. So I'm practically isolated.

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Maya-

How much longer till you are done with your research?

Maya-
Maya- in reply to Hidden

One year and a half more, but I have been in this situation for 2 years already. I'm tired, every time is more difficult to find my strength and keep going.

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Maya-

How Important is finishing your PhD to you? You have a masters. It’s not like you couldn’t find work without the PhD. Can you take a sabbatical from your research? Maybe return after you have recouped?

hypercat54
hypercat54 in reply to Maya-

Can you move closer to town? You wouldn't be so isolated then. Another option maybe is to finish your Phd in your own country nearer relatives and friends. x

Billsfriend
Billsfriend in reply to Maya-

I have found really good advice at both Alcoholics Anonymous, and from some Churches. Know that a lot of AA and NA meetings are open to all who want to attend, regardless of whether you have that problem.

Hidden
Hidden

The only thing wrong with you is that you are human. Any human person would be lonely while studying abroad.

Well, if you are in another country, I imagine that can be difficult. Welcome though, and congrats on your phD!

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