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[Kianav]

Does this really last forever? Depression anxiety can I ever he cured. I was so scary to get on meds and now they stopped working I feel like shit and to make it worse my daughter's birthday is today her 7th how can suicide be rules as selfish when this life is completely unberriable

[fauxartist]

it's obvious your feeling like your in a crisis....and that's a horrible feeling...so my question is....are you in contact with your doctor as this is very serious, and also are you in therapy, do you have a therapist to call....

[Kianav in reply to fauxartist]

I need a therapist I had a counselor but for some reason she kept bringing up God and was more concern that i find myself ugly. I'm honestly scared to look for a trusted therapist

[fauxartist in reply to Kianav]

Taking the chance of finding a better therapist is better than the alternative, which is to stay in this funk, even thinking of the ripple effect on your child and all those around you is inconceivable. I knew a gal in college who lost their mother this way, and the damage was never going away.

....we cannot do this alone, and for a therapist to bring up God is unprofessional unless you are talking to a Priest, Rabbi, or other form of cleric to begin with.

[Kianav in reply to fauxartist]

Do you think I should check myself into the hospital

[fauxartist in reply to Kianav]

if you feel you are unable to control the impulse of wanting to take your life and your are in crisis...yes.

[KJBlue]

You definitely need a therapist you can count on. Have you discussed possible changes in your meds?

[Kianav in reply to KJBlue]

My PCP changed my meds to 10 mg of lexapro because I was over analyzing everything I was at a 20mg and a med that will make me sleepy I'm already sleepy and Im scared I won't be able to properly take care of my kids on the med that will make me sleepy

[KJBlue]

I understand you think the only way out is suicide, but that would leave your family and friends devastated. I had a cousin and a cousin's son kill themselves. I also have a nephew that attempted it. I saw the devastation and fear my brother went through and it was awful. Have your meds changed recently or maybe they need to be reevaluated. Who prescribes them...your regular doctor or a psychiatrist. Unless your symptoms are until control it is best to see a psychiatrist.

[Agronseth09]

Live for your family and kid especially. You will learn ways to cope with it over time.

[Agronseth09]

Live for your family and kid especially. You will learn ways to cope with it over time.

[Kianav in reply to Agronseth09]

How do you hope

[fauxartist in reply to Kianav]

hope is finding a solution that works for you....hope is seeing your children grow up and having a parent that has beat the odds of this disease enough to be there the best they can for them. Kids learn by example...and they don't come with manuals...so every parent is on the learning curve when it comes to how to raise happy kids....but for you to beat this, get the help your need to do so, and learn to live with this disease and manage it when your in a dark place....and they see that your trying....that's hope.

[Agronseth09 in reply to Kianav]

And if you meant cope there are, meds, therapy, support groups, workout, meditation, journaling etc

[crowningglory19]

I'm so sorry you are hurting so bad with this depression anxiety! I do hope you are better soon and hope for better times ahead! Enjoy the small things, and build hope upon them. I have found that when I take magnesium and ginseng, they calm my body, mind and soul. They also get rid of those sticky negative thoughts and feelings that get me down. Yes, they really work. There are many things to help us on this earth. Also, I get outside, breathe deep in creation, touch the earth and look at the stars. That helps me remember the bigness of life and the constant faithfulness of it all. Also I meditate on wise words and stretch myself thru learning, art and groups like meetups, studies, and classes. Anxiety is so much more a problem than it used to be, some of spiritual, some of it physical. <3 Hope this helps you too.