Trying to be the bigger person

[LonelyJ0]

I broke up with my ex after 10 years. Now I am a lost soul not knowing how to go on with life. On the outside I try to make it seem as if I am fine but inside I am broken and dying. Initially she damaged the relationship by cheating. I looked past it and tried to continue our relationship. I’m not saying I forgot but i did forgive. It still hurts to think she cheated on me after all this time but I love her, still do even though we’ve been broken up almost a year now. Unfortunately we still live together but I plan on moving the end of this month. In doing so we have to switch over accounts and what not which has been a nightmare. In my head there’s no reason for us to be linked together account/financially but in her eyes she still wants to remain on my accounts and what not. I am trying to go about things peacefully but when trying to discuss anything nothing is accomplished and it ends bad.

[sweetiepye]

I know it's hard, I'm sorry you're going through this. Ten years of your life is a long time ,but maybe you'll find someone for the rest of your life. As long as you remain connected to your ex in any way you won't get over her and she will still be dependent on you. I'm guessing that's what the banking is about. You'll just have to accept that she will be angry for awhile and that may be a good thing. Try talking or writing about your feelings, it really does help. Pam

[LonelyJ0 in reply to sweetiepye]

Yes that’s how I feel it would always be a connection if we did remain connected financially. Honestly I don’t think I’ll ever find anyone. I am extremely shy am afraid to go out alone. Thank you though for your kind words.

[sweetiepye in reply to LonelyJ0]

There are shy women too and when people know you are available they'll want to hook you up. Join a group where you won't feel funny going alone or take a class and find someone with similar interest. You've got this.

[fauxartist]

sorry for the break up...but when I left our meager stocks and checking account in both names after breaking up....guess what....a couple credit cards were opened and stocks sold and debt on cards of 6 grand and then they took the money and ran...so don't put yourself in potential harms way....if she wants a break up....why would you even think of keeping her name on your money...even if she contributes for now....what's the point if your not together...what's her motive, why does she get upset when you want a clean brake....just do it, close the accounts....open your own in your own name....if your being manipulated because your still holding a candle for this gal....and something goes sideways with the accounts...believe me...your gonna hurt worst with your account MT. Of course she may not be that kind of person....but she did cheat on you....that's not very honest....sorry....but that's from my own experience...yours is your own....