Self hatred

[Cat26538]

I really hate myself. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve tried everything to make my family happy with me. Unfortunately I’m a complete failure. Im not worth it anymore

[Byelka]

With help you will be well. Are you seeing a therapist/counselor etc? I'm worried by your phrasing. You are worth it! You might not be able to control what your family does or thinks but you are worth love. I know all this sounds like cliche but I believe it.

[Cat26538 in reply to Byelka]

I just started seeing a therapist.

[Byelka in reply to Cat26538]

I'm glad to hear it. Can you call them, or have someone else you can call? Talking it out always helps me. If not when I get really low and start having dark thoughts I like to write down a list of things that make me happy. I hope that helps!!

[Shannon00444]

Your therapist is going to teach you some new phrases to replace the useless ones you’re using. Take a time out. Stop worrying about who’s happy with you for awhile. I’d be more worried about what I think of myself in your case. Distract yourself with a brisk walk or a funny movie when these thoughts come up to undermine you. Interrupt them, tell those thoughts that they are some straight up BS, don’t let them take hold. They’re wrong and with time you can stop them. And you have to stop them. Make it a goal to work towards.

[sweetiepye]

Hate is a very strong word. There are things I don't care for about myself and sometimes I do hate the things I do. I'm wondering if you can tell me one thing you like about yourself ? It would be a place to start .

[Cat26538 in reply to sweetiepye]

I love the fact I can cook and sing

[sweetiepye in reply to Cat26538]

If I could sing I would think I had the world by the tail. Even my Grandkids will ask me to stop singing. If I could sing while I cook I would fall in love with myself. So of course I want to know what do you like to cook and what do you like to sing. This is my most recent creation it doesn't have a name yet and I am a little of this a handful of that kind of girl.

Cook about a cup of orzo , drain very well. I cook it 13 min. Add a chunk of butter, has to be butter, Juice of 1 lemon with a little lemon zest. Very small pinch of sea salt, has to be sea salt. And the crucial part a generous chunk of Parmesan Reggiano grated. It is expensive but a good 10.00 wedge will last a couple of weeks. Just writing this down I know I'm going to have to make some tonight. It is a sharp and tangy, but also very creamy dish. Also serve in a nice bowl. Bon appetite . Pam

[Cat26538 in reply to sweetiepye]

Thanks

[gogogirl]

Are you kidding? You have to make yourself happy- I know from experience that it;s an ongoing process. You cannot make other people happy- they have to find it within themselves.