I have always had low self esteme but for a few years now I have developed this extremely hatred towards myself. I am not a violet person and don't particularly "hate" anyone but when I look at myself hate, disgust, and anger escalate quickly.
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I've had trouble with self harm but have been trying to avoid it as best as possible. Also my counselor has talked about 100% or 0% thinking where I view situations as best or worst and nothing in between. I am very emotional so my emotions are also at 100% or 0%.
Does anyone else feel like this? I need help.
8 Replies
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Yes, I feel like this. I am very kind to others but I find it difficult to feel kind thoughts towards myself. I relate to you very much. I think it helps to be around people who genuinely care about me although I have found it difficult to allow myself to be. Therapy helped me too to not isolate myself as much as I'm inclined to. I'm still learning though.
I can totally relate. I’ll do anything for anyone as long as it’s not me. I’ve always been that way. Now I’m stuck in this depression and I have to choice but to care for myself. This isn’t the way I wanted to learn to love and care for myself, but I’m going to have to if I’m going to make it through.
I think it may have been our previous lack of love for ourselves that can lead to us being depressed and feeling overloaded. Speaking personally, my harshness on myself has often meant I've pushed and pushed myself to exhaustion and that has ultimately left me more depressed. So, I guess I'm saying that the route cause needs to be addressed if we are to get over depression. We need to learn to feel loveable. Easier said than done. For me personally, believing that we have an everlasting purpose and are created for a reason helps me.
I do feel that way to at times but I'm better than I was in the past. I think learning how thoughts and feelings are different from cognitive behavioral therapy helped me alot.
Thank you for sharing. I used to feel how you described, especially when I was struggling with depression. However, I worked on myself esteem, reminding myself that God makes everyone beautiful and in his image. As well as, everyone is unique and special and no two people are meant to be the same (even twins - there personalities and characters are always different). What has worked for me is to encourage myself, just as I would encourage others by using positive self-talk. I have three techniques that really help with avoiding self-harm and learning to love myself.
1) EFT - Emotional Freedom Tapping - it is a strategy where you tap in specific pressure points in your body as you say positive things to yourself. (bit.ly/3yaiGlY)
2) The 557 breathing technique is take 5 deep breaths in while thinking good thoughts about yourself like I matter, I am special, I am strong and then hold the breaths for the count of 7 focusing on those words about yourself, then let out the breath slowly for 5 seconds letting go of any anxious, self-defeating, unhealthy thoughts. I do this one to three times a sitting.
3) The gratitude journal is writing down something good every morning and night something that went well in the day, or something I appreciate about myself. Taking our focus off of the anxiety and depression and focusing on positive uplifting things really helps. What you think is what you believe. So thinking uplifting things you believe those things but the reverse is true - thinking negative self-defeating things, you will believe those.
I will be praying for you. Remember you are special and not alone. We are here for you. Feel free to pm me if you'd like to chat. Hugs and God Bless
Thank you so much for your response I really needed it. I will have to give those techniques a try. I did try writing a gratitude journal but I struggled to do it daily but I definitely need to start again. Again thank you❤
It is definitely hard to keep up with a gratitude journal but worth it. Remind yourself daily you are worth it. You have value and you are special. Feel free to reach out anytime and pm me if you'd like. Know you are not alone. We are here for each other. I will continue to be praying for you. Hugs
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