This is extremely personal but this community is amazing and completely supportive so here goes it.
I've been doing some thinking and my life did not take a toll for the worst until October through December of 2016. During that span of time I accidentally came out to my parents who are very unsupportive of me being gay. I was left broken hearted after a 4 year semi-abusive relationship and then about a month later I was sexually assaulted. I had the pressures and stress of graduating from college in December 2016 and all of these things happening during that time were too much for me to handle. I drank alcohol excessively and damaged my liver (which is now healed since I haven't drank alcohol in over a year now).
It wasn't until after all of this happened in which I broke down and the constant dizziness/lightheadedness/off balance/tired/spacey feeling appeared. It has certainly gotten better over the past year along with my panic attacks/anxiety, but I still live with it 24/7.
Do you think this constant horrible dizzy sensation is in regards to possible PTSD and unresolved emotional trauma? I never went to therapy in regards to all of these events because I'm stubborn and independent. I tend to think I can manage everything on my own, but maybe my subconscious doesn't seem to agree.
All of the medical tests are negative and I am physically healthy but I feel so unwell.. Maybe my past has a lot to do with these feelings.
Thoughts???
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rachel913
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rachel913, I may not be a psychologist, but I can almost be certain these are the markings of PTSD> When traumatic, unresolved issues happen in our lives, those thoughts have no where to go except to display physical symptoms of the long term stress you've been under.
Getting some therapy in addressing what plays over and over in your mind can help in you going forward and ridding yourself of these symptoms. Only you can make that decision. xx
Rachel it takes time to retrain our brain, to replace negative thinking with acceptance and positive thoughts. Lightheadedness/off balance feeling use to consume my every day, my every step. Therapy didn't really help at the time because I wasn't really listening to what they were saying. Not until all that you hear and put to use will you start feeling better and better. It is a process of relearning. Our subconscious mind is not quite sure if it should trust our judgment. Eventually, our conscious mind will take over and take control once again.
Don't give up, one day at a time, one step at a time. It will happen for you as it did for me. There's another motivational song that Rachel Platton sings "I'm going to Stand by You" and I will. xx
wow there are SO many people who have dealt with the same feelings as me.. this website makes me feel a little less crazy.. i read that it takes roughly 2 months of complete acceptance and no fear to retrain your subconscious and start to become desensitized. i can't not worry about how i feel for a day... like you said it consumes me with every step i take. gahhhh
Aw I'm sorry to hear that.. but do you really think persistent lightheadedness could be a symptom from ptsd? It never started until after a bunch of traumatic events:/
This could be complex PTSD which is a combination of things happening over a period of time.
Refusing to recognise that you needed help was akin to breaking your leg or something and being 'independant' and 'stubborn' enough to deal with it by yourself. I guess you wouldn't do what would you? Seek help now is my advice.
Don't beat yourself up over it though as we all get things wrong sometimes - it is called life!
It is a strength to reconise when you need help and not weakness and you will learn from this for the future. We all do. x
Rachel, Lincoln is credited with the following observation:
"An attorney who represents himself has a fool for a client."
Please seek assistance from a professional to assist you in resolving some of your issues. Don't be tempted to be your own psychiatrist and diagnose yourself.
For various reasons, don't jump too soon on the PTSD wagon. Number one is you don't want that label appearing in any file that may come back to haunt you if you do not have PTSD. There are a number of other reasons that don't need to be explored here. My neuropsychiatrist has gone to some lengths to reference some of the components of PTSD in my file, but not use the diagnosis of PTSD per se.
PTSD may have some familiar components, such as anxiety, depression, ANGER, VIOLENT BEHAVIOR, horrible nightmares where certain experiences are relived as though they are real, insomnia and a few other nasty companions. Because PTSD can manifest with several of the behaviors I capitalized, it can have future negative effects on employment possibilities, legal issues, etc.
AND LASTLY, if you actually had PTSD stone cold, I rather believe you'd know it, not just wondering about it. Some of the components of PTSD are that strong. Be well and seek the help you need to better your life. You've had enough trouble and deserve a happy future.xx
Thank you so much for this detailed response, I appreciate it I guess at this point I'm just trying to put the pieces together as to why I feel the symptoms I do on a daily basis. And given my past with everything that's happened it was just another thought. Although you're right, I shouldn't be playing doctor with myself and actually just get answers from a professional psychologist. It's just hard to make that leap :/
That "leap" may be hard for you, but sincerely believe it's much easier than what you are dealing with by yourself. Much more like a large step, rather than all the "digging" as to where the causes lie....you may actually reach China before you find help that way.
Hi rachel913 sorry for the suffering you've been through. yes i too have constant dizziness, lightheadedness, constant sound in my head, that came on 2 years ago; and after blood, thyroid tests came out normal, i finally believed my psychiatrist that yes it was anxiety. i have some PTSD too- related to my anxiety which i've had from childhood from traumas then. i couldn't understand why i'd suddenly have dizziness in my 40's when i had anxiety all my life- but my psychiatrist said new symptoms can happen, brain chemistry changes thru time, etc. It is awful i know- the way you can be sure it's not something physical, is paying attention to- does the dizziness calm down when you're less anxious? I always believed and still do, that a great friend who listens and understands, is better than any therapist- so , talk to a friend at least about all you've been through. but if you don't have a person like that, who is non-judgmental and LISTENS (most people don't know how to listen) , then i hope you can find a good therapist or support group. Blessings
I love this post. Deep and unfiltered. I don't think it's PTSD. You might have damaged more than your liver. ...says the guy who was misdiagnosed by the entire se CT medical population for gallbladder failure.
PTSD, depression, anxiety, stress - sorry to tell you, but they're all basically the same. Labels sometimes help define what we're talking about - but 'Complex PTSD'? What's that all about?
Your physical symptoms - they're exactly that - symptoms - anziety etc can produce horrific physical symptoms - been there, done it!
What you experience in your fear, and any emotion or thought which you think is 'out of control' is your human centred mind at work (HCM) - some call it the 'ego mind', but that tends to conjure up pictures of Tarzan banging his chest, which is not what is meant.
Your HCM will do ^anything^ to keep you 'safe', in the familiar, in your comfort (hurt) zone. It hates change. It runs (ruins) your life based on what it has learned.
It runs your life based on core beliefs that you have established through life - both negative and positive.
It hates change.
But, who or what controls your HCM? You do, of course. If you didn't there would be two of you!
So, it sounds easy, but is not always so. Take charge of your mind.
We are the creator of our emotions - we are not the victims of them.
We are the creator of our thoughts - we are not the victims of them.
Unless we want them to be be - when we succumb to the HCM.
When you feel abandoned etc, and you beat yourself up, ask yourself 'Would i say/do this to my child?' If the answer is 'no', why on earth do you do it to yourself?
When you learn to love yourself, you'll laugh at all your present shenanigans.
I do to this day
David James Lees of Peakhouse Practice (google it) helped sort me out - he's now a great friend. Have a wander around his web site and watch a few of his videos and blogs. When you feel resistance, remember the HCM is trying to 'protect' you - keep you in the 'hurt zone'. Tell it to bugger off.
This sounds glib, but it's not. Take responsibility for yourself. What other people think of you is none of your business. If they have a problem with you - it's their problem!!!
No affiliation etc. In fact I#ve subsequently become an EFT/Matrix Reimprinting practitioner which can be very effective and fast on any form of emotional/physical condition. Look it up.
Yes it could be PTSD. But please make absolutly sure that it is not something physical. I am reading that you checked it with the doctor. But some diseases is very difficult to diagnoze, like lupus or lime disease for example. You have to exclude all this for sure for your own good. Good luck and hugs to you!
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xx
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