I have had anxiety for as long as I can remember. The odd thing about my anxiety is that it's not necessarily constant. It ebbs and flows throughout the course of my life it seems. Sometimes I can go a year without having a major outbreak, other times it seems that a second cannot pass during the day that I am not weighted down by it. I recently was traveling from overseas back to the united states. The plane ride had several legs but the longest was over the pacific for about 9 hours. About two hours into the flight, seemingly out of nowhere, I went into a full on panic attack. Talk about scary. . . a panic attack at 30,000 feet over the pacific ocean knowing that this plane was not landing any time soon. I jumped up and went to the gally where the flight attendants and explained to them that I was having a panic attack and needed them to talk me out of it. A lot of times I can push through my panic attacks if someone is talking to me and calming down. They did a great job and I made it through the flight. My next flight (which was my final leg) was 4 hours long. Coming off the incident on the pacific flight, I got to scared to get on my last plane and ended up missing my flight. It's a terrible feeling to know that you are too scared to get on a plane and subsequently being stuck unable to get home. I ended up going to the local ER and just explained to a Doctor there that I had severe anxiety and I need SOMETHING to get me through the flight. He gave me two .5mg of Ativan (a very small dose I believe). I am unsure if the pills actually worked. . . I mean I got on the flight and made it home with no panic attack. But I did not feel mentally any different, and I was still a bit anxious getting on the flight. Maybe it was just enough to take the edge off? At any rate I made it home. . but my anxiety would not allow me to rest now, it was in full swing and have a great time with my brain. Did you ever see the old original Star Trek series? There was not really a constant overarching theme to it. Each episode was a “monster of the week” type of story. That's how I feel like my anxiety is. Today I can have a panic attack because I am terrified that I have gotten some rare disease and tomorrow I can be in a full panic attack because Im scared Im going to get depressed. Yes, as odd as this sounds my latest episode is due to me worrying that I am going to become depressed as a result of my anxiety. I was sitting in my room at night, and this wave of dread washed over me, it's hard to explain. My thoughts were that I am alone right now, and as a result of being alone I am going to become depressed, and as a result of becoming depressed I am going to do something stupid. Mind you, I am not depressed right now but worried myself to sickness that I was going to be. . . does anyone else go through this crazy type of catastrophic thought process with their anxiety? I feel like im the only one and its driving me crazy.