For me, as I have been dealing with it for a few months now. Some days it's just silent in the background..but it's there. Then something happens, rattles my cage, another setback, another insult or injury..another insensitive comment..and I'm completely Drowning in it..it's Despair.
What does it feel like to experience this awful INVISIBLE pain?
It's like uncontrollable Bleeding INSIDE of me. In places I cannot Show you. Bleeding emotionally and mentally.
There is a BIG..very BIG ignorance of depression in this world. No wonder many people suffer alone in silence. They're afraid that others Insensitivity will cause More Harm...and we are weary of the weight we carry now...we're afraid of that one last straw
Written by
Sonny216
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All I can say is that it feels horrible for me. No motivation. Nothing seems to matter anymore. Things I used to laugh at irritates me now. I went from being a cheerful outgoing person to feeling like a human hollow shell. I would like to curl up in a ball and be left alone.
I feel apathetic. I dont see color, I feel almost like I want to cry but cant produce tears. I feel heavy in the head. I want to shut my eyes constantly and sleep for hours to make it go away. It makes me feel incompetent. It makes me want to hide. I push everybody away.
For me it’s complete numbness. Not knowing how I’m feeling, how to express myself, being disconnected from others, even when they make the attempt to talk to me or show they care. It is like you say complete and utter despair and it feels like I’m screaming inside, although I look fine on the outside.
Mine has gotten worse. Family around me think I'm being lazy..they don't know I'm crippled inside and crying for help..they want me OUT..they don't care if I'm on the street
Im so sorry that you have people around... Like drowning as a boat full of people stand there and watch but no one reaches out there hand... I too have no one. Often standing in a room full of people lying to them and myself with fake smiles.. Nobody notices when your dying inside and that you could just give up and end it any second.. The empty feeling that washes over us when we can't accept that nobody sees what we feel or even worse they dont care.. But I dont have to know you or live with you and I care. I do not want you on the streets you deserve better than that.. I dont want you feeling lonely or sad because you deserve better than that. I dont ever want you to give up because you are better than that. . hang in there . find your motivation. And if you feel lost and want to let it all go just breath and know it IS worth it to keep trying even if you can't seem to find a reason .. And you can always reach out to me. Because I care. And if a total stranger like me can care so much imagine the possibilities of other relationships and people who love you. Just hang in there. Sadness is not forever
For me everything is scary. The lack of appetite too. Everything seems pointless. I went from working and volunteering all hours to weeks of being unable to function at all.
I am sleeping better thankfully and long for night times now as I finally get respite from the feelings of dread.
I can see from these posts however that everone's feelings and experiences are different. It does so help to realise however isolating the condition is, you are not alone.
The darkest pit that I can't climb out of
Its the absence of feeling. All you can feel is your inner anguish and frustration because your miserable.
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What would you do???
Does this sound like you? 
How do I tell parents about my depression?
It feels so much like the end.
