Feeling sad cos my decisions

[vanessi]

Today is a new year, and i have already blocked my ex from whatsapp, i closed my social media, etc, I don't wanna have any kind of communication witth him, it really breaks my heart but i know i need to think of myself and start healing.

It is a tough day, i am really sad and i have been thinking of my life, i just can't see any futtre to me, everything i see and hear make me feel bad. I'm not strong enough to deal with all this.

There are many dark clouds over me right now and i didn't start the day with happiness nor hopes

[Lexica02]

Keep looking forward. You have many years ahead. Your life is what you make it

[vanessi in reply to Lexica02]

I hate my life, that is the problem

[Lexica02 in reply to vanessi]

You only hate it now because your future vision suddenly changed and you feel lost. You need to look in another direction and find and follow a new path

[Agora1]

But you know vanessi, you did the right thing. You took that first step forward in healing and thinking about yourself. I'm proud of you. I know it's not easy. The sadness will take time but will slowly fade away. You are stronger than you think and each day forward will prove that to you. The dark clouds will soon pass just like they do after a torrential rain storm and then the sun will come out again. One day at a time, don't look too far into the future. Hugs xx

[vanessi in reply to Agora1]

Even if i did it i don't see any future and all this made me feel so bad. I haven't recovered yet so at the moment i am having a really bad time

[Hidden]

I can relate to so much, but just want to say that sounds like you're already taking steps to better yourself. It'll be a process of different emotions and that's okay. You're are strong! I know it. We just have to keep fighting for ourselves.

[vanessi in reply to Hidden]

Thank you but this steps are hurting, i never imagined everything was going to end like this, I feel really bad tonight

[Hidden]

From what I see, you are one strong woman. I stayed for 20 years in an abusive marriage. You are strong because you stopped it. I was weak and very sick and aloud someone to control me. Don't look to far ahead cause you'll miss the daily blessings.

[vanessi in reply to Hidden]

Thank you, the truth is I am not strong enough, I must see I'm very weak and it's been one of the worse moments in my life. I haven't healed and still feel very sad and depressed and I think it is getting worse

[Hidden]

Do not say that! Look at your strength in ending something that was not healthy for you. I was sick and weak for so long. I will admit that I don't let people get close to me but is my barrier. I finally feel ok with my alone life. All I want is my son and his family to move back to the U.S.. I'm here for you. Wish I could wrap my arms around you and let you know all will be ok.

[vanessi in reply to Hidden]

My last relationship was very healthy, no dramas just happiness but then I don't know what happened. I cut the communication with my ex cos was so painful to keep in touch without being together. I still miss him and love him. He is the most amazing man I've ever met

[Hidden in reply to vanessi]

My ex of 14 years came a few months ago to visit me. I really loved him but he cheated and always blamed me for doubting his honesty because of my mental issues. I was right about him the whole time. I feel for you cause for me, I have never had a real true love.

[vanessi in reply to Hidden]

My ex never cheated. We were so in love. I'm sorry for your situation hopefully you will be able to experience that true love one day