I’m at the end.

[mn15]

I’m really struggling, I’m done.

I need to disappear or just want everything to stop, I want to have nothing going on. Nothing to deal with.

Life is hard I know it is. We all have to suck it up and get on but I’ve been battling this for so long and it isn’t getting better or easier.

I went out for my Christmas party last night but it was so hard. I just gave in and got very drunk and had a very frank conversation with my boss (who luckily was also very drunk, so I’m hoping he hasn’t remembered!) about how I was feeling. And in doing so made things so much clearer in my head that I really am done.

I don’t even know how I need to stop I just know I need it too.

[kenster1]

hi sorry to hear of your struggles lets hope it gets better soon.too much drink is certainly played part in how you feel now.if he remembers he might offer you more support in fact he should.dont over worry and be to hard on yourself.

[Rick1on1]

Hi,

Yep - you're right - life is hard. But it can also be so much more.

What brings you joy?

[Windy101]

Drunk conversations are usually not that well remembered. And when they are, people realize stupid things are said on both parts fueled by the alcohol. I think you're in the clear there.

Please give life more time. Are you in counseling or taking medication? Your feelings sound very painful and I can understand that you need relief from them. I urge you to talk to a doctor who specializes in depression. It seems clear from your post that you are having a lot of symptoms.

Today, just stay alive and keep breathing. Call a hotline if you need to. Meanwhile, you've come to the right place. There are such great people here, and we'll all been through it. All of us here have hit a wall at one time or another and understand.

The thing is, there is hope. You can feel better. You can recover and live a better life. I know! I've been right where you are.

Please get some help and meanwhile, just stay alive. If you tell us the general area where you're located, we can help you find resources.

Best wishes to you, friend. You are precious on this earth and belong here.

[TruthSi72]

Hey @mn15

So what’s the plan?

Si.

[mn15 in reply to TruthSi72]

There is no plan. I have to keep going. I have to be a mum. Life is for them and so I keep going.

[TruthSi72 in reply to mn15]

Sounds like you have a plan