Yesterday was one of the worst days for being triggered in to a panic attack.

My confidant and support person I see every 2 weeks to get my social security payment called up to say my medical cert hadn’t been excepted. I was so upset. I just had a new diagnosis, I couldn’t believe it. I have just started seeing a clinical psychiatrist and she had givin me 2mths off. Being in a panic, I called my sister to call up and ask why my medical cert hadn’t been accepted. This woman,who I’ve trusted and confided in completely turned nasty and abused my sister and used personal information about me and told my sister that I was lazy, I don’t like my sister, I go shopping all the time, I constantly talk about the past, she even bought my little 10 year old nephew into it! I am still shell shocked. I have never ever been rude to that lady. All I wanted was to find out why my medical certificate hadn’t been accepted. Turns out she made it up! It is still being proceeded. She got her back up becasue she had been caught out.She wanted me to finish this horrible online course I didn’t agree to.(I can’t concentrate or stand loud music) If I didn’t get my sister to question her, I’d still be going back to her and undergoing (what’s been putting me under immense stress) her short courses and meetings. She completely disregard everything I’ve ever told her. She even said to my sister there’s cancer patients and I’m doing nothing. I’m so upset over it. I’ve learned never to trust anyone again with my private information. I sufferagoraphobia and for her to say that’s been lazy has really shocked me. She new how overwhelming every appointment was for me to leave the house by myself. To also try to pit my sister against me! My sister had the smarts to ask on my behalf to transfer me to someone else. But I’m left with a trigger migraine, I can’t eat and after finally trusting someone again, well I won’t ever trust anyone with my personal information. My sister also wouldn’t tell me what else she said about me not liking my own sister!? So I’m also left so paranoid as to whether my sister believed that nasty woman or not? I’ve never said a bad word about her. I also need to muster the strength to make a formal complaint, but this type of attack brings me back to the work place where I was attacked in a similar way verbally behind my back. I’ve come 2 years of therapy to get away from all that. And this woman has put right back to square one!

Devastated.

[Markyt]

Hi Candice,

From what you've said, your sister knows you well and due the fact she asked for you to be transferred to a different person, I'm guessing that she saw through the vitriol and 'lies' that this person has said on your behalf. therefore try not to let this worry you too much.. I know this is easier said than done but this person really shouldn't be working in that type of role.

If you wish to take it further then perhaps you could ask your sister to help you with a formal complaint, but only go down this route if you feel that you will benefit form it. yes she shouldn't be allowed to treat anyone like this again and a complaint should mean she id disciplined, but

what i'm saying is that you need to weigh up if you are able to deal with this without it impacting on your own sanity further.

perhaps try to copy what you have written here and write it on a complaint form and submit it if your sister can't help (sounds to me like she will but obviously i don't know), i pretty sure that calls to the job-centre are recorded, so unless it was a direct line to someones desk, you should have plenty of evidence.

finally, try to be good to yourself, you have done nothing wrong by submitting a a new med cert, its unfortunate that such people exist, particularly when dealing with people with mental health / anxiety/agoraphobia conditions and its obvious to me that the issue lies with her and not you.

Please take care of yourself and try not to let it affect you, remember the owrk you did with your therapist to get you to the point of not needing to see them anymore.

regards

Mark

[Hidden in reply to Markyt]

Hi Mark,

Thanks so much for your advice and reply.

I am really upset that I’ve trusted this lady for past 2 years I’ve been working with her.

I have decided that I’m going to make a formal complaint. I just don’t feel like I can let this slide.

It is causing me huge panick and anxiety, but I also think it’s time I stood up for myself. I’ve been blamed and attacked by people before and had my past used against me by visciois people. I never give out of my way to be nasty or mean to anyone. I guess that’s why I’ve been an easy target.

So that’s been part of my therapy, not to let other people get to me.

I just can’t belive a government employee who is bound to keep information private would do this!

I always handle everything by myself, I’m the eldest in my family, I take on all the problems. I need time out. The one time I asked for help was to get my sister to call up on my behalf, and this woman just flipped! I’m in a state of shock still.

So now I’m following up with the complaints line and hoping there’s a recorded phone call, but it was to her desk.

I also have emails from her lying to me that my medical certificate was not accepted, which so far seems to be untrue.

Thanks so much for reading, it helps to be able ti get it off my chest when I don’t have anyone else to talk to. And I don’t want to keep bothering my younger sisters.

[Markyt in reply to Hidden]

Hi Candice. No problem.

I used to be a middle manager for a government body so if you need any further assistance or if you wanna sound off then please feel free to private mail me.

I don't check here all the time so don't worry if I don't get back to you straight away. However if you say you will need to talk, I'll try to keep an eye out for you.

I'm also in the process of formalising a complaint against my consultant psychiatrist, but am in a really good place mentally atm, which is why I said for you to weigh up if you thought you could deal with it without it consuming you

Anyway, good luck. I hope this woman gets what she deserves, whether that's disciplined or (and I would never normally wish this on anyone) given the boot.

Ignorance is not an excuse for her behaviour, nor is being plain nasty but it smacks of both through and through.

Kind regards

Mark X