Everything seems hopeless

[williteverstop]

Where to start I dont know, if i did I guess I would be somewhere else. I have suffered with depression my whole life, lack of self esteem, easy to give up. When ever I try to explain my thoughts I just sound crazy. I end up in co dependent relationships that are abusive my current girlfriend abuses me physically and ive given her so much leverage that she is now taking advantage of the relationship. I stopped my meds when I moved in with her and she doesnt like that I took them but I know they helped with my mania and mood swings. havent been able to work because I just dont care and i do everything I can to just stay afloat. Im trying to work through it as my moods can last 6 to 8 months or more I never know when they will stop. I wish she understood that her mental abuse is just traumatizing me more and making me less effective. Im pretty sure i missed a lot of other things here that are on this overflowing plate but I guess ill come back to it later

[Swanred]

Listening

[poodlelover81]

I'm not saying that it's OK for your gf to abuse you but first and formost you need to take care of you. That means taking your medicine as your doctor prescribed. Unfortunately we live in a world where people think you can just "get over it" without taking medicine for mental ilness, but no one would ever think that for say, the flu. You might want to try couples' counseling. If your gf refuses then I'm sorry to say I don't think you're with the right woman.

[erraticthoughts7]

I am in a similar situation, not as far as abuse is concerned but an unhealthy relationship non-the-less. It has been difficult for me to break free because it becomes easy to accept all things negative when you are innodated everyday with negative thoughts. You accept this as part of your reality because in our world being unhappy is better than being alone. I try to find positive reinforcements with things that I like to do and the few people in this world that I know love me unconditionally.