Hopeless

[Tamka39]

They say sober life is a better life, Or Life is better sober, it's time we flip the script and offer some concrete reasons for why this is true. laying down on this couch. I feel so miserable tried and so lonely and bored feeling lazy. Going through the mood swings and motion of life. Wondering what’s my real purpose on this earth 🌍 I feel so guilty and ashamed and am not even drinking.I feel like a bad mother and I don’t know what am going to do when my mother leave she helping me out when I suppose to be helping her and my sick son my life suck right now and I feel so lost because I suppose to be able to be strong for my family and am weak

[Hidden]

Tamka39, let me kno when your ready to go to some AA MEETINGS IM COMING up on 10 yrs sober 10/21/08 is my sobriety birthday so let’s go.

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

That’s my son birthday congrats to u what AA meetings going to do for me

[fauxartist in reply to Tamka39]

give you support and guidlines how to get sober, stay sober, and have a support group of people who like i this place will actually be there for you..some will go so far as to give you their phone numbers and you can call them when most people you know would not know what to say to you....they would. Honestly with yourself first, because if your not honest with yourself...nothing else you do will matter. Do this for you,....

[fauxartist in reply to Hidden]

I will say happy early birthday George...great jot and congrates.

[Hidden]

The fact you are sober I think shows you are being strong for your family. If anything your sobriety is the proof of just how much you are willing to endure for the love of your family. You are being strong.

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you

[Hidden in reply to Tamka39]

You got this 👍🤗

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Awwww I appreciate it

[Tamka39]

Same here

[Hidden]

I’m sorry it sounded like you were sad because you weren’t drinking my bad.

[Tamka39 in reply to Hidden]

Don’t be sorry am struggling with my emotions of not drinking because am use to numbing my feelings and right now am feeling everything

[pink83737]

I know how you feel when you say “what’s my real purpose on this earth” you’ll find it soon, everything happens for a reason and remember this too shall pass. Hang in there it gets better

[Tamka39 in reply to pink83737]

Awwwww thank you

[hypercat54]

Hi maybe the only real purpose of life is life itself and it is a means to an end. You have to find your own meaning in life and you have this already - your kids and family. These are what makes life real and meaningful.

I am sure you are only looking on the negative side of being a mum when you say you aren't strong. What about all the things you do which are good? Write down a list of all the good things you do such as cooking meals, washing their clothes, shopping. Kisses and cuddles and showing them how much they mean to you.....I am sure you can think of lots more.

No one is ever 100% strong but accept your weaknesses and never feel shamed by them as they are part of you and make you human. x

[Tamka39 in reply to hypercat54]

Awwwwww thank you

[fauxartist]

Getting sober is only one part of getting healthier. If we don't address why we self medicated with alcohol we just become 'dry drunks'....and are even more miserable because what we used to obliterate ourselves to forget is all still there when ever we come down from a binge or try to stay sober. If you have depression, drinking alcohol is an oxymoron.... alcohol is a depressant....throwing fuel on the fire so to speak....

no judgement here...I have been in recovery for decades...but I didn't really start getting better till I got help with my demons and ghosts that haunted me when I was sober. Not only my depression but my child abuse issues as well. You can be a good mother by getting your life squared away..and stop feeling guilty about something that is out of your control...it's a disease, both addiction and depression....there are groups many frown on....but they are good starters for support and direction on how to get and stay sober..... and no they are not cults.....just a tool to help you get sober. And it costs you nothing but your effort and willingness to change your life as it is. Therapy is also very important with the depression aspect of someone who may be dual diagnosed.

[Tamka39 in reply to fauxartist]

I been on Prozac for 10 days for my depression and Xanax for my anxiety and have a intake appointment today to start seeing a therapist the reason I drink is because of childhood trauma sexually abuse throughout 5 years old teens years and adult years and my dad going to prison when I was 2 year’s old and died in prison when I was 8 never got to meet him put a hold in my heart

[fauxartist in reply to Tamka39]

that's a lot on your plate honey.....and my heart goes out to you as I understand dealing with loss and abuse. I am glad your starting therapy as it will help you sort out all that stuff...but if you go to therapy while your still affected by alcohol, you won't get the full benefit in the long run, so try to give yourself a few hours sober before your appointment. I say that from my own experience as well. This is a difficult journey, but like with everything, we gotta start somewhere....best wishes to you and glad your sharing about it....

[Tamka39 in reply to fauxartist]

Am 12 days sober😂 and am on Prozac for 11 days am thinking about drinking

[fauxartist]

Do you have any group support to help you with the urges to drink?....again....no judgement .... I'm not that kind of a person that is going to preach to you..... I hated it done to me.... I am just someone who understands those urges when we start sliding down emotionally. It usually takes a couple of weeks for any SSRI to kick in fully and be effective. But with cravings....I would talk to your doctor about something that you could take temporarily to get you through the initial stages of trying to stop drinking, and you need daily support to stay sober.... This is not our fault, we were born with these diseases.....the only thing we have control over is managing them.

[Tamka39 in reply to fauxartist]

No support group just Prozac and Xanax and online group and different apps to reach out too

[Gryphon1 in reply to Tamka39]

I read article that Prozac can make you want to drink, give you cravings. I think that what happened to me as before I went on it didnt drink that much. Prozac made me manic and I drank much more. Now having bad withdrawal symptons and problems since quitting Prozac and my life is a mess. Please check out information on this before taking Prozac or ssris.

[Tamka39 in reply to Gryphon1]

Sorry to hear that happen to u I don't have any craving

[Gryphon1 in reply to Tamka39]

Sorry I thought you said you were thinking about drinking in previous post to fauxsrtist.

[Tamka39 in reply to Gryphon1]

I only said that because am use to self-meditating with alcohol but since I been on my medication I can't drink and that's the first thing I think about when am having problems

[Gryphon1]

Me too, but was just letting you know that Prozac made it worse for me and when I read article it was like a light bulb moment. Everyone is different on meds just wanted to let you know so you could have info if needed, I hope you can get the help you need and I want to send you good wishes. You are doing really well so far keeping strong.

[Tamka39 in reply to Gryphon1]

Thank u I appreciate it