Introduce Yourself

Ok so my email says introduce yourself. Hi, I am a 30 something mother of 2, married, about to graduate from college with 4.0 and high honors, married, with a nice house and just about everything I wanted in life. I was diagnosed with depression in my teens, have many suicide attempts in my history, but I like to think that is my past. When I got married my husband wondered why I needed to take antidepressants anymore, wasn't I happy with my life? Good point, I guess. And when I got pregnant i came off meds and decided that I really had no reason to be depressed anymore. But my kids are growing, I still have no friends, I still can't get myself to leave the house for very long. I have tried to make my life everything I hoped and imagined would make me happy, but I still struggle.

I'm here because the term high functioning depression keeps popping up in my news feeds and I know that's me. I'm here because while I consider reaching out to a doctor or therapist about my struggles, I worry about the stigma behind it and worry about it wrecking my career path. So I do nothing, and I'm pretty good at it. I can go long periods feeling ok, and I can sink pretty low, but I know the lows will pass if I just keep putting one foot in front of the other, one day at a time. But it is lonely trying to remain upbeat and not let anyone know im struggling. So after reading yet another article in high functioning depression I followed the link to this site.

So I may be to afraid to admit that I am struggling, to say it aloud, to take a step toward seeking any professional help because it maybe career suicide, but I think being able to say it I'm writing and read other stories that remind me I'm not alone, and just to somehow be connected yet anonymous could be a half measure to help! So, here I am, thanks for letting me join and feel a little less alone.

1 Reply

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  • Hi and welcome! Seeking professional help has never hurt me at work, however, my side effects from medication have. That is something I cannot change and it doesn't matter where the blame for the problem belongs, I simply don't measure up. Fortunately this didn't happen until many years after I sought professional help.

    I am a very high functioning depressed person also but if I have a difficult period it usually means it's time to change antidepressants or add a mood stabilizer. I have atypical depression, formerly called bipolar II for lack of a better classification. So...you are not alone! But you are not on any drug, either. You probably could go without any depression if you were on an antidepressant at least part of the year. Maybe that's food for thought?

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