I was in hospital for a year after a surgeon made a total mess of a laparotomy and separation of adhesion's (from an older surgery). He left a piece of colon floating loose but with a blood supply causing repeated sepsis. I was always prone to anxiety which if prolonged took me into depression - this was a chronic condition. This horrible surgical experience has thrown me into an acute state of anxiety and depression which has now lasted two years. I feel paralyzed, in pain, without interest and enthusiasm or empathy for myself or others. How I was my old self back but I think he is gone forever and the future is just so hopeless. I have tried a whole range of medication, counselling etc etc and nothing seems to work. I just wish it or I would end.
Anxiety, Depression and/or PTSD - Anxiety and Depre...
Anxiety and Depression Support
Keep trying different options and maybe if there is a way for you to get closure about your surgery that may help. What a horrible thing to happen to you.
You can't find your old self at all? Meaning the depression and anxiety are always present? And no drugs work and no therapy has worked to bring you up out of depression and so the real you hasn't emerged in 2 years. Right?
Whew! I get it and it stinks!! I'd miss the old you, too! 2 years is way too long. Is it safe to say that you've been on tricyclic meds and MAOIs, SSRIs and SSNRIs and Wellbutrin? What about ECT? Is that a possibility?
Is there really no end to this bit of colon causing infection? It would seem to have to respond to antibiotics eventually and the bacteria would finally all be dead and you could resume a more normal life. Can't your emotions return to where you feel empathy for yourself or others? Or get excited about something? I don't understand that part too well.
Stay strong!!!! I have faith something will work for you
Awww thanks Rachel ... that gave me a boost
Your welcome hun.... I thought I was alone in this!!! Being a African American it's really never talked about, so it's refreshing to know that I'm not alone and you're not either😊
Definitely keep trying different options, don't get discouraged. Something will work!