Better day to be positive

[AlexaLee7811]

So, I had a wonderful time with my boyfriend last night! It was like my anxiety disappeared! I was not going to let it ruin such a wonderful evening with him and we had a great time! It was loving and passionate and very like us again! Anytime my anxiety even tried to peak I shut it down by focusing on other things. I focused on the seconds I had in life. I focused on what I was doing how I was breathing how he was breathing and how peaceful and calm it was in the vicinity of each other. I talked to myself in my head basically saying "ok you are breathing, you are watching tv, you are holding his hand, his hand feels warm, you are feeling calm" and just brought myself back into reality. It won't fix itself I know that but it is a daily thing to work on. I think it starts up when I am not around him because it makes me worry about something...I am not sure what so if anyone has any idea that would be great! It feels like when I am not around him my anxiety works itself up and when I am with him it just relaxes....not sure what that is supposed to mean? But it was wonderful I felt all my passion for him and just the urge and desire to kiss him and hold him and love him. It was amazing but I still know it will take time to work on and my biggest thing to work on is when I am not with him. Any ideas or suggestions as to why my mind might be doing that when we are not together?

[Vesa]

Hi AlexaLee,

It is so wonderful to hear you are so happy in your relationship! I'm wondering if it may be that when you are with him, you are very focused on him and less energy is spent on thinking about things that would contribute to anxiety. Maybe a good suggestion would be to try and find something that you can turn to that will keep you focused when you're not around him?

Does anyone else have any suggestions?

[AlexaLee7811 in reply to Vesa]

That's exactly it ! When I am with him I am myself I just am so unfocused on everything else which is so different from my ex. My ex I was so focused on the anxiety also I lost myself too with him I lost who I was I wasn't my sarcastic outgoing self. Things have been tons better worth my boyfriend it's a daily thing but I am feeling myself again. When the anxiety comes up I am so distracted by him and our love feels so strong that it just kind of subsides or I tell it To go away or I focus on the seconds instead of the anxiety. Thank you so much for your response it is much appreciate and so kind of you to take time out of your day to