Having a rough time.

[Kirplinko]

Hello there.

I was diagnosed with depression while I was in college. I strongly believe that I may also have an anxiety disorder though I have not been diagnosed. I am currently not taking medicine for either issue and kind of think that I should.

My mom has always suffered from severe depression and cannot function (her words) without an anti-depressant. I know that she understands what I am going through, but I feel that so many other people around me don't, especially my husband. I almost feel that he is embarrassed by me when I am feeling depressed, like he is going to be judged by others for his wife's illnesses.

Was just wondering if there is anyone else out there who feels this way.

Thank you.

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Hi Kirplinko, sorry to hear that you are getting these feelings from your husband. I can totally relate, as my partner was a bit the same when I was treated for depression and social anxiety early on in our marriage and she initially saw this as a big weakness in me and was scared for the future. I had to reassure her that its not the end of the world and its better than having a lot of other diseases, but its hard to be reassuring when you are depressed! I think a lot of people must experience this and it really increases the stress in your life. Like you, I had some family history and so it was helpful to remind myself that this is just the hand that life dealt to me and I had to make the best of it. I also got better at explaining to my partner and other people what was happening with my emotions when I was feeling bad, and I really believe keeping things secret makes it worse. When her sister got very depressed I was able to give some support and I think she has realized that this is something that can affect anyone, and that there are some positives because people with this experience are able to understand other peoples challenges better. It's good that you got diagnosed and you are getting the treatment you need. I had a very good experience taking an antidepressant and doing some cognitive based therapy (CBT) which helps me think more clearly. Hope it helps to hear this experience and just keep going a day at a time! Best, Jimmy