Please help!!!

This may be long, but I appreciate anyone who reads and helps... So I have been suffering from anxiety and depression for 3 months now. At first anxiety was my biggest issue now I think its depression. I've been on Lexapro for a little over 5 weeks. Helped a lot with the anxiety. Now I think the depression is really kicking in. I have constant thoughts of death (I have reached out to my doctor about this), not like I want to harm myself, but like being so terrified of it. I picture stuff happening to me all the time and its really hard to control the thoughts. My doctor says its part of the cycle, but how long until all these symptoms subside? I am ready to have a normal life again!! 

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  • Hi Kmarc, Please know that what you are going through is NOT unusual... and yes, it could well be a 'phase' that you are going through... but I know what you want is "What do I do right in this NOW?" ... You could ask to speak with a certified counselor or therapist. He/she might come up with some ideas as to what brought this on...and that could be helpful.

    This is just a suggestion... look up (Google) some videos by Anita Moorjani.... this is NOT about anything that tries to 'influence' your beliefs in any way ... But her own incredible story....So many people have found her book/videos really comforting and it helped them overcome their fear of death... Also, you might keep affirming to yourself: I will get past this...All is well...because this, too, shall pass. Good luck to you and take care! :)

  • Hi Kmarc

    I have been taking depression medications for 6 years. I have done CBT, group therapy, one-to-one counselling. I have tried 5 different type of medications. I share what I have been through with you.

    -I see things happen to me such as bad car accidents. I feel the pain for real.

    -I get lost and can not find my direction even my home

    -I stand in front of my class(I am a teacher) and can not remember what i am talking about

    -I feel blank, empty and nothing( hope it makes sense)

    -I cry and cry and cry.....

    -my body shakes and jumps during sleep

    Ok, how do I carry on? I try to make time for myself, going to gym, watching my drama, eat outside, going out with friends, have a date with myself, talk to someone and make one thing easier for myself. I do all of those once a month. I have a check list. 

    How do I get better? I know I am not better. medication keeps me going but if I want to get better I need to be away from any kind of stress and pressure and I can not afford this. 

    my advise to you: It takes time for medication to kick in, around 4 to 6 weeks. Give it more time and then if it is not helping talk to your GP. You want to harm yourself because of internal pain. it does help for a moment but you feel awful after. Try CBT( cognitive behaviour therapy) and be brave. It sounds funny but hug your loved ones. Go for a walk and concentrate on sounds around you, It is very difficult at the start but gets better. You are going through a lot. 

    I hope this helps you my friend. 

  • Ativan might be useful for treating anxiety in combination with your Lexapro for depression.  Check and see if you can safely take them together.  Doctors will throw out 'it's part of the cycle' but they have no idea of how anxiety can take over your life with thoughts of helplessness - I really hope you can get back to your normal good will self again.

  • Hello kmarc, that was n't long at all. I don't know much about anxiety but after nearly 40 years of depression . on and off in spells, I know a bit about it. To keep this short I'll write in note form.

    Not easy but you can beat it. Regular sleep habits and healthy eating more important than you would think. Recreational drugs and excess alcohol big no noes. Read JIm Phelps site "psycheducation" and anything else you can that helps. Educate yourself on problem. Medics can help you and you need them but your knowledge and courage is biggest factor. Fish oil (read phelps) might help and certainly won't harm.Keep people who know to minimum, (attitudes to these problems still bad,but improving) otherwise you'll start leaning on your problems as a crutch.  One trusted confidante who is aware of problem and helps is much better than ten blabbermouths.Good,sympathetic GP essential.

    I do hope this is a one off experience for you but the above should help and if it does recur the above should mean you are well armed. The anxiety I know less about but I think meditation and breathing techniques will calm you during anxious spells. Investigate them.

    best of luck Olderal

  • Hi I have been living with depression most of my life with my current episode triggered nearly four year ago. Note that I live with depression, I don't suffer from or fight my depression. There is no cure but, with the right treatment you can recover. During the past four years I have had suicidal thoughts and have cut and burnt myself but I am recovering.

    Don't get disheartened by what I have said, you need to understand the nature of the illness. Recovery is slow and there are set backs when you hit a trigger but just focus on healing yourself.

    Be kinder to yourself, get the right professionahelp and don't be afraid to ask for a different therapist if you don't connect with the one assigned to you. I know it can be difficult because you feel so vulnerable but believe in yourself and focus on what is good.

    I write a summary of each day, how I feel, what I achieved and where I have struggled. You will be surprised at how often you have good times.

    Stay strong,believe in yourself and ask for help when you need it.

    Take care And best wishes

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