Failing Badly

[Carjul60]

Help! I'm supposed to be losing weight, but since lockdown and the cold weather, I seem to be over indulging again. For some reason my brain decides that cold weather is a good reason for a bit of comfort eating. I am being way too heavy handed with bread, cold weather is a great time for soup, but I can't seem to say no to the accompanying bread. Also, left over Christmas sweets turned up yesterday, and they are just sooo tempting. I think I'll have one or two and end up having 10. Is anyone else as weak and spineless as me.

[bikegrrrl 1lb]

I am definitely like you, but I try not to see it as a moral issue, it is the way I am made. There are lots of different factors and influences on why we eat the way that we do, and they won't be the same for everybody.

Are you new to the site? If so, TeamAdmin will be able to give you some introductory tips for getting the best out of it. (And welcome!)

You seem to have a good idea of why you are eating the way you do ... the next step is to figure out how to handle it. There is bags of inspiration on here, the trick is to work with what makes you tick.

I have gone back to basics and am counting calories again. I am planning what I eat in advance, within a calorie envelope, and recording my plans in the Daily Diary, for a bit of support and accountability. Check out Tuesday's DD: healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

[Carjul60 in reply to bikegrrrl]

Yes, I am new to the site, and still finding my way around. What makes it even more annoying, is that I once lost 7 1/2 stone and got down to my ideal wight and I've now put 4 1/2 of it back on. I am so stupid, and I know it is all down to comfort eating. It's gonna be a real struggle to get all that off again.

[Jessiecake in reply to Carjul60]

You are still three stone down though. Remember that

[moreless Administrator 7 stone in reply to Jessiecake]

Hi and welcome, Jessiecake

All of the information you need about the forum can be found in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and I hope you'll be joining all the Events, Challenges and Clubs that we run, especially a weigh-in and the daily diary.

We've found active participation to be key to successful weight loss and, of course, it's a good way to get to know people, find inspiration and share support and encouragement.

Wishing you all the best

[bikegrrrl 1lb in reply to Carjul60]

Not stupid! Human.

But every day we have choices.

I play a little game with myself. Which do I want more: to guzzle chocolate, or to be a healthy weight? I can't have both. If I choose the chocolate, fine - but it is a choice I will have made with my eyes open.

Good luck Carjul60 !

[Subtle_badger]

I am curious about your passive voice. "Also, left over Christmas sweets turned up yesterday"

What does that mean. Do you have no control over your food supply?

I will stop with the rhetorical questions. How do left over Christmas sweets turn up in your face?

Slightly jealously,

SB.

[Carjul60 in reply to Subtle_badger]

We moved fairly recently and things ended up everywhere. We have been trying to get one room at a time straight. We were sorting out bedroom number two, and came across a tub of Celebrations that we acquired over Christmas. I initially thought it was a tub of odds and ends, but then I noticed the sellotape around the lid. It had been such a naff day that the lid came off and my just have a couple disappeared into the sunset.

[Subtle_badger in reply to Carjul60]

Yeah, part of my success is not having that stuff in my house.

I doubt I could resist once they were open.

[MMP1]

I checked my BMI when I first found this site. I found the calculator on the 12 week plan under 'Getting Started'. The Admin Team will guide you in the right direction to start with and the rest of us on here can support you on your journey. I count calories and plan my meals when I get up, for the day. I use an app called Lose It! which is free. I get weighed weekly and add it to the site. I am struggling to lose weight as I only have to lose about 8lbs more. Exercise is key for me, but I have recently had pneumonia and I have autoimmune illnesses which make me tired. With the lock down as well, it is hard to get out as much. We still have to try though. There are exercise programmes on this site. Some are only 10 minutes long, so good to get you back into the swing of things. I hope this helps and good luck with journey.

[Tiggerr]

Welcome Carjul

Good luck!

[lucigret]

Hello and welcome Carjul,

Nobody here will think you are weak, spineless or stupid. We have all been where you are at some point in our journey to loose weight.

The strange times that we are living in at the moment and the cold is enough to challenge our eating. I too was very cold yesterday and a picture of a lovely hot sponge pudding covered in custard was drifting in and out of my brain - no I didn't succumb!

Firstly get rid of the sweets, temptation just has to be removed. Freeze the bread so that it is not so readily available. You really can eat soup without bread, honest, I never thought it possible, but it really is

I see you lost over 7 stone in the past, well done. I wonder if you looked upon it as a 'diet' rather than a healthy eating plan for ever. The word 'diet' makes us think there is a beginning and an end. I'm afraid there really is no 'end'. Once you go back to eating the way you used to, the weight will return. You need to find a way of eating that is going to be really enjoyable and sustainable for life. If you always do what you have always done, you will always get the same results, so maybe time for a change of tactic

Have a read of this,

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

If you haven't already, please take the time to read the Welcome Newbie post, this will help you to navigate the forum, which is best done using the full website and not the app.

Please also take a look at all of the Challenges, Clubs and Events that we have, to help to keep you motivated and engaged with the forum.

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

The above link will take you to all the information you need. Participation is key to success and I would recommend that you at least join the Daily Diary and a Weigh In day of your choice.

Wishing you the best of luck in your weight loss journey and looking forward to seeing you around the forum

[Lerwick1]

I can certainly relate to the sweets issue. In your place, I would have a few and then throw them away, out of their container and really mixed up with the rubbish so that I couldn’t change my mind.

This is a difficult time. I can only suggest turning the situation on its head. Instead of thinking ‘This is awful. I need to comfort eat.’ Try ‘I am going to have at least one good thing come out of this situation. I am going to come out of it just a bit healthier and fitter.’ Good luck.

[Hidden in reply to Lerwick1]

If only....sounds easy....

[Lerwick1 in reply to Hidden]

I know, I know. Believe me I don’t find it easy. It is usually 1 step forward and 3 back. But I am using tips and inspiration from these posts. My progress is snail like but it is still progress. So good luck and wishes for you too miamiamia.

[Hidden]

Yes I am the same....you feel oddly like you need to treat yourself.

I have discovered bagels....hot cross buns have come back on my life.....I was doing so well....

[GardenMW]

Hi you are def not alone in looking to food to cheer you up but...after you have eaten whatever then how do you feel ? I always say to myself ‘why?’ !!

And yes you can manage without bread , biscuits and sweets. Throw them out then the temptation won’t be there. Try a glass of water and or chewing gum !!

Life at the moment is so unsettling we can only try our best ,but if it’s going to go on for months we will all look like role-poly s if we don’t focus .

All the best we can do it 🤗

[Twenty2go]

I am a bread with soup girl, but if I start, I can’t stop, so I have to make the soup really bad hick , so that I can’t dunk easily.

I too am using the NHS plan with a weekly weigh, so knowing where I am calorie wise in a day.

When you think you are going to comfort eat come onto the site and start reading the posts. Did that a month back and managed to stick to just one leftover chocolates. The rest are still in the jar.

[BerlinBetty Visitor]

Dear Carjul60 . I sympathise, I really do and it's one of very few times we can truthfully say we are all in the same boat. However, please note your vocabulary: 'I seem to be'; 'for some reason my brain decides'... You are not an alien in your own mind and body. I'm afraid the bottom line is that we all have control over what we do over the next few weeks, so yes, we are confronted by our weaknesses and failings, and we can't blame anyone else but ourselves, even though that sounds harsh at this most difficult of times.

Try speaking to yourself as 'You', rather than 'Me'. I've been doing this for years when under pressure. Most times (not all!) it works. We are all turned in on ourselves to some extent at the moment and it's Showtime for our best selves and this is the Big Act: are you going to be a Self-cast Hero or a bit-part that lurks in the background, ashamed of itself?

So start a diary and be honest with Your Self: ' Found some elderly Smarties in the back of the cupboard going back to Boxing Day. They look a bit dry but so tempting. Well? What are you going to do? Eat them no with a cup of tea or chuck them down the loo?'

The important last part of this entry is 'It's YOUR choice.'

Yes, it's not easy. The Easter mini eggs I ordered online for Easter (Portuguese chocky too sweet for me) are sitting in the larder, shouting' Come on, eat a few of me early!'

I'm a chockyholic, so having them in the house for eleven days is a bind and a challenge. But it's MY responsibility, no-one else's, to eat an apple instead, each time I'm tested by the Weak Me.

Good Luck. Be strong. Realise that you are POWERFUL and have INFINITE POTENTIAL. So you can do it.

BB x

[Hidden]

You are being way too hard on yourself and certainly are not "weak and spineless". Don't punish yourself by thinking that way. You will never achieve long-term weight loss if you see foods as 'good' and 'bad'. No-one is perfect and everyone (and I'm absolutely certain it's EVERYONE) who is trying to lose weight has days when they eat more and lose self-control. Try to accept the occasional binge day (or even week) as a 'normal' part of weight loss. Instead of seeing it as failure (in the scheme of things it really isn't) and just try to get back on track again the next day (and if you don't, it still isn't the end of the world!) Also bear in mind that is actually a primal instinct, dating from your slim stone-age ancestor to eat more in cold miserable weather as it's a time when your body would try to gain calories/fat to see you through a period when less food would be available. Be kind to yourself - we've ALL done it. Maybe you are restricting yourself too much and need to accept a slower weight loss and build in treats such as a few sweets/bread into your diet (tell yourself that you are allowed them occasionally and take time to actually enjoy them, rather than stuffing them quickly with feelings of guilt). If you really can't resist eating the sweets in one go, donate them to a needy neighbour

[Carjul60 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. Sometimes it's just hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

[lighterflyer]

I know exactly what you mean. When it comes to food, I think some of us have to change our brain wiring. The more we give up and fail the more we expect to fail and so it goes on and on. I’m hard wired to fail. We need to find a way to change that perception once and for all.

[Angelfun]

Please don't be hard on yourself. I have a lot of weight to lose and lockdown is doing me a favour because of the inability to shop as freely before. It's made me control my food consumption and face up to the extent of my over eating. Try to incorporate some indoor exercise which is a good mood booster There are plenty of videos on YouTube for inspiration. Soup is a good choice. Still have bread but reduce down to a slice and maybe have a side salad to aid the feeling of fullness. You can do this!

[moreless Administrator 7 stone in reply to Angelfun]

Hi and welcome, Angelfun

All of the information you need about the forum can be found in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and I hope you'll be joining all the Events, Challenges and Clubs that we run, especially a weigh-in and the daily diary.

We've found active participation to be key to successful weight loss and, of course, it's a good way to get to know people, find inspiration and share support and encouragement.

Wishing you all the best

[gman1961 Restart April 2024]

I can relate to your post,I'm sure many others will do as well.

Have a better week.

Gary

[Carjul60 in reply to gman1961]

Thank you

[Deardarcy]

Just weighed myself and i weigh 17 st 9 i weighed 12 stone 3 years ago. Thats a lot of weight to put on in such a short amount of time.

I woke up this morning thinking i have to do this because i hate my body so going to do the 12 week plan.

The lockdown seems to have made my brain say yay party time lets eat... But im going too change that thinking.

[moreless Administrator 7 stone in reply to Deardarcy]

Hi and welcome, Deardarcy

You may find these of interest and help healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... which is supported by phcuk.org/wp-content/upload...

All of the information you need about the forum can be found in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and I hope you'll be joining all the Events, Challenges and Clubs that we run, especially a weigh-in and the daily diary.

We've found active participation to be key to successful weight loss and, of course, it's a good way to get to know people, find inspiration and share support and encouragement.

Wishing you all the best

[Carjul60 in reply to Deardarcy]

Hi. Sounds like you could be my twin. I was 11st 3lbs and now I'm 16st. I always vowed that I would never put my weight back on once I'd hid my goal weight. I got down from 18st 9lbs to 11st 3lbs in 16 months, and now stupidly, despite all my promises to myself, I've blown it big time. I am just so mad at myself.

Good luck, I hope this works well for you.