Feeling Sad :(

Hi everybody

Wow I'm feeling sad, and I don't really know why. It's possibly a couple of things which started it, one being not getting a grant we'd applied for and another being a visitor who sat next to me at my desk and I could smell he had been smoking - I just don't know. The whole day was actually a good one, celebrating yet another birthday and we had cake etc - but this feeling stuck with me and as I left the office, into gorgeous sunshine, and walked to my car it was like I could taste the tobacco. The trigger lasted all the way home - I stopped at the co-op, walked into the shop, remembered I hadn't come to buy anything then went out again and straight to the cashpoint to get some cash for tonight. I then got into the car and drove straight home.

I thought I'd be okay if I used my e-cig when I got home but this feeling doesn't seem to be lifting. I'm also feeling tired.

I could understand it if it had been a rubbish day at work, I've had at least 2 great night's sleep and my mouth feels better so I'm not actually suffering at the moment. it could be I'm tired and upset because I had this ginormous trigger to deal with. Or I guess it could have been the big sugar rush I got after eating some cake which has now dipped again. Actually I'm feeling a bit sickly so it is probably that.

I'll be fine, I'm just pouring it out to get rid of it and then I'll be fine again soon - sorry for being a grumpy and I hope that everyone is feeling fantastic xxx

25 Replies

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  • Hi Everybody

    I'm sorry! I think I just had end of the day end of the week tiredness and it was a bit overwhelming! I'm recovering nicely now and about to pop into the shower to get ready to go out!

    Sorry for being grumpy - I'm really getting back normal now - sorry ! :)

    xxx

  • Hi Chrissie, hey I think we all get grumpy some time along our quit trail, sooooo, dont you be sorry gal, cos if you want a moan and groan, or feel down in the dumps, then you come and tell us eh :) :) am not saying we will listen to you, but hey it will do you good eh :)

    I think there's only one Lady on here who hasnt moaned, and thats our Emjay :) although saying that, she did moan when it was very very windy once, cos it nearly blew her car door off :D :D ermmm, then there was the time she got ermmmmm, pooped on her head by a seagull :D :D :D

    Hey Chrissie, dont you go telling her I told you :o ;)

    Enjoy your evening with your lovely Daughters :) :) xx

  • Hi Hun, aah don't be sad - there will be triggers from time to time that we just have to fight against. So stay strong and fight each one. You can do it. You're doing a great job. Enjoy ur night xx

  • Hi Briarwood, thank you so much and I can promise you that all is wonderful again and I feel great! Off out with my daughters now so will catch up tomorrow sweetie xxx :)

  • Hey Chrissie,

    how you are / were feeling is quite normal and is what usually happens during the stopping-smoking-journey.

    Do you really believe that your visitor in work smelt nice? Stale smoke... I don't think so... :-/

    Get your lovely self ready and get out there and have a fabtastic night :-)

    Take a few deep breaths, think about your reasons why your stopping and don't let them become your excuses for wanting to start again.

    This is the part where smoking seems to become all lovely and attractive again... but remember that it isn't and you'll be okay :-)

    You can do this and we all have faith in you xoxox

  • Hi EmJay

    Thank you so much for your message and I promise you I am absolutely fine now!

    I've had my shower, washed and dried my hair, put my face on and I really do feel so much better now - I honestly think I was just tired - it's a long week with early starts and late finishes some nights and a long drive when you feel like that - but I did nothing for an hour and then I started to come round again. Danielle is actually so excited about going out to celebrate her birthday with her sister and her mum, it just so different - I normally get left at home!!! :D :D :D But now I'm all refreshed and ready I'm really looking forward to it and it should be fun!

    No he did not smell nice at all - it wasn't that I wanted one but I think maybe it triggered something because I rarely even think about smoking at work and that was just a reminder that I don't think about smoking at work (not good!) :(

    Ironically I gave up smoking mainly because I could tell it was affecting me like when I had to run for the bus or something, but the one thing that stopped me buying any cigarettes tonight, apart from the fact I've stopped smoking and didn't actually want one - was that I resented the thought of spending the money on cigarettes!!!

    Anyway my beautiful girls have arrived from their dads and are all upbeat and excited about going out to play so I must go now and will catch up again soon!

    Have a wonderful Friday evening

    Love Chrissie xxxxxxxxxxx :)

  • :) :) :) Enjoyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

  • Chrissie......oh no....not nice to hear you feeling sad. Guess we will all have our moments here and there. Hey...day 17 ..or is it 18!? I'm even loosing count now....3 weeks after this weekend thou!! We are doing great ;) Nearly finished my Alan Carr book...which is actually helping to make the fags seem more horrid than ever!! Must say I walked behind someone smoking the other day and breathed it in....and I liked the smell ;(. Bad me!!!! :p

  • Aup Mummy, how you getting on then ?

    Hmmmm, as for you liking the smell still, ermmmm, well so do I :o so that meens there's 2 bad me's about eh :D :D :D

  • Hey Pete I could not help but notice a 4 week winner badge! Is that a mistake :-(

  • Aup Ian, its great to see you pal :) and 7 months quit now then, thats just flippin fantastic pal :) I'm sorry I havnt spoke to you before, but had a really busy week at work :P :(

    4 weeks, thats right, its not a typo error :D I ermmmmm, had a little hiccup just before I made it to 5 months, soooooooo had to start again :o but hey-ho thats flippin life eh :)

    I hope you and your family are keeping well :) Speak soon.

  • Hey pete, yeah all good thanks.

    Shame to hear you had a hiccup, but it's great to see you went straight back to giving up!! My first attempt was over 12 years ago so it's really great to see you hit this again.

    Giving up smoking and remaining off the fags is so extremely difficult.

    But you will do this. :')

    Speak to you soon.

    Ian

  • Oh I have done that too breathed in when walking past someone who is smoking hahahaha

  • Au Kaprin, i hope your having a lovely day :)

    Ahhhhhh, so thats 3 of us naughty ones then :o :D :D :D

  • Hi Mummy - I'm sorry I must have missed this post last night! :(

    I promise you sweetie I'm absolutely fine again now - I really do think I was just mixing up tiredness after a busy week at work, with a trigger, because once I'd been home for an hour I started to feel great again and ended up having a fantastic (completely smoke free) night with my girls.

    The AC book is so good, I love his counter arguments to the excuses that people give for not wanting to stop smoking, they really do turn things around and make it clear that you have absolutely nothing to lose by stopping smoking because those excuses are a myth! Also the people who gave those excuses were exactly the same people who admitted that knowing what they know now, they would have never started smoking in the first place, and they desperately didn't want their children to smoke either. I've used those excuses myself many times, it makes me cringe to think about that now!

    Anyway, we are now on Day 20 Baby!!! Wey Hey and a massive Happy Dance happening tonight I can promise you that. But for now I must get on with my chores, maybe I'll do a bit of a bum wiggle dance whilst I'm pushing the Dyson around!:)

    Catch you later and have a great Saturday xxx :)

  • Make that 4 of us :)

  • Hope u have a fab night

  • Hi Chrissie, sorry to hear you had a bad moment, one of the reasons my last attempt to quit failed was the tiredness which after researching I discovered is one of the very normal side effects when quitting and I would cry at the drop of a hat and felt emotional all the time. Don't underestimate what you are doing it is huge and something to be very very proud of, the side effects suck but are just a passing feeling and you'll get through it :-)

  • Hi Happy-bird, how are you doing???

    Thank you so much for your message, I feel a bit daft now because after a bit of a rest and time to get myself ready I actually felt really really good again.

    The trigger was like a massive wave which lasted so long, but it upset me more because I just wasn't expecting it at that moment in time. It seems liked I'm prepared for triggers at certain times, and they are not actually coming anymore - but the unexpected ones just knock me for six!

    Anyway all is great again and yes, I'm very happy to have reached 20 days of stop smoking - wey hey, that's brilliant.

    And I hope all is going fantastically for you too!

    Love Chrissie xxx

  • Glad you're still happy Chrissie, I'm on day 11 but almost feel like that's a lie, I went back to work after my surgery a bit too soon and was really struggling wuth the pain and a colleague not knowing offered me a cigarette when I was sitting down out back trying to pull myself together and I took it so I guess that puts me on day 3 but I'm so proud of myself for not allowing that one to aet me back to old habits that I'm sticking with day 11, it would have been too easy to start up again and in the industry I'm in there are more smokers than non smokers but I've now told everyone and they're being really supportive :-)

  • Hi Happy

    You have done so well not to succumb to smoking again in that environment and now that you've told the others I'm sure they will support you (and may even join you!) so very well done you! :) :) :)

    I'm sorry but I have to ask you, what industry are you in? Where I work absolutely nobody smokes so my habit was a complete secret and although they probably did suspect I was a smoker, nobody ever asked me. This puts me in the situation where I can't actually talk to them about stopping as I'm too ashamed to admit that I was a 20 a day smoker in the first place!

    I hope you are feeling better after going back to work so soon after your op - I hope you plan to get lots of rest and give your body more time for recovery!

    Take care and have a really lovely relaxing weekend! xx :)

  • I was exactly the same as you Chrissie, a secret smoker with only family and a couple of close friends knowing, god knows how I fitted in 20 ish a day but I did, very committed me lol

  • ha ha ha - I know what you mean. Now I wonder how I found the time to smoke 20 a day when I never smoked during the work day at all so it was all morning and evening smoking - that is so terrible when I think about it! It had got much worse since my youngest also went to uni, I was alone so much that I was just smoking my way through it, not because I wanted to but because I could.

    But that is all behind me now I am very happy to say :) xx

  • I work in hospitality and smoking is used by a lot if staff as a coping mechanism for stressful situations an excuse to take a break and let of steam as the general public can be hard work a lot of the time, we don't have regular breaks so popping out for a cigarette is pretty much the only break you get, I'm still doing that but with my e-cig but it is really hard, fortunately I've now got a week off so that'll help me with my not smoking journey :-)

  • Hi Happy, I wondered if you were in hospitality when I asked, it just kind of fit what you were saying. Yes that is a tough environment to quit smoking in, but your week off will really help you and you've done nearly 2 weeks now so you are doing really well already!! Stay determined and you will get to your happy place! :) xxx

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