Ok some bad jokes, I apologise in ad... - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

9,876 members β€’ 10,027 posts

Ok some bad jokes, I apologise in advance 😁😊

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits
β€’33 Replies

I missed the World hairdressing championships on BBC 1 last night,

does anyone know if they’re showing the highlights

.

I never knew that the Mandarin for microwave is ping wen dun.

.

.100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars.

Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses.

The stables have turned..

.

.I went for a bite to eat at an upmarket burger van last night...

It had 4 Michelin tyres..

.

.

Life's not good for me at the moment. I've been diagnosed with insomnia and dyslexia.

Being a Catholic means I've spent the last few nights lying awake wondering if there's a dog.

.

.

I sat next to an insurance salesman at a Robbie Williams concert.

And through it all, he offered me protection

.

.

β€œI knelt to pick a buttercup. Why people leave buttocks lying around I’ll never know...”

.

.

I had this terrible dream last night where I thought I was a member of Herman's Hermits...

Woke up this morning feeling fine.

.

.

.

β€œI do all the exercises every morning in front of the television - up, down, up, down, up, down. Then the other eyelid.”

.

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I used to live on a houseboat. I went out with the girl next door for a while but we drifted apart.

.

.

.did you know, that Raymond Burr had a brother that was a lumberjack ?

His name was Tim 😊

33 Replies
β€’

🀣🀣🀣Good to have the jokes back darling. Love the buttercup one. Appeals to my sense of humour🀣🀣🀣

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to MadBunny

Knew that one would appeal to you😁😁😘

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply to Bazzak

Really?😘

Hello Bazzak πŸ‘‹ like the jokes 🀣

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to Hb2003

hello Hiba hope you are well 😘😘

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Bazzak

I am doing well ❀️😊

πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

Bazzak Cake roll

my breakfast ❀️
Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to Hb2003

looks lovely xx

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to Bazzak

Thank you

Love the insomnia and dyslexia one, tickled me πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

hmm πŸ€” insomnia is the devil πŸ’”

BTCCET profile image
BTCCET in reply to Hb2003

I know Hiba, I suffer myself, that's why I'm often on here early hours of the morning πŸ€—

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

What have you tried to help ? I have tried lavender tea honey and medicine

BTCCET profile image
BTCCET in reply to Hb2003

Do they help? I've tried all sorts Hiba including at one srage medication, this didn't agree with me and I didn't want to become dependent on it so I gradually stopped it πŸ€—

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

They did help a bit especially the honey and lavender tea β€οΈπŸ˜„πŸ™

BTCCET profile image
BTCCET in reply to Hb2003

OK that's good I'll give this a tryπŸ€—

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

I hope that it works for you 😊❀️

BTCCET profile image
BTCCET in reply to BTCCET

*stage not scrageπŸ™ˆ

Hb2003 profile image
Hb2003 in reply to BTCCET

πŸ˜‡πŸ™

πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

I love the buttercup one like MadBunny! A great selection. 😁🌸

MadBunny profile image
MadBunny in reply to Marnie22

Don't praise him too much Marnie......😁🐰

I’m smiling quite broadly 😊 B! some are good! Thanks for sharing πŸ˜ŠπŸ’•

A wind turbine asked the turbine next to it, "What music do you like?"It replied, "I'm a metal fan."

BTCCET profile image
BTCCET in reply to MadBunny

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

BrentW profile image
BrentWArtist

These raised a smile. Thank you.

Thanks Bazzak. You should only apologise in advance of your name is Claire ... Voyant...

Love the one line jokes.My type of humour, always make me chuckle.

Midori profile image
MidoriVisually impaired

Time has not been good to most of those jokes!

πŸ˜€

And he's off and running again..... πŸ€£πŸ‘

Bazzak profile image
BazzakReading Rabbits in reply to Callendersgal

😁😘

πŸ˜‚ It's the way that you tell em! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜πŸ‘Œ

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