Post op meeting.

[Suzanne333]

Having my staples out today. 👍🏻

I have a post op meeting with my surgeon next week. What will this entail? Will he tell me the grade of my cancer? Will he tell me if it was lurking anywhere else?

I'm a bit scared of what he might say. Xxx

[Katmal-UK]

Hi Suzanne

He will if you want him too. If you decide you don't want to know then tell him. I choose not to know the grade/stage. I did ask to be told where the cancer was. To be honest I could work it out the grade/stage myself as my mother had been through OC many years before and I later had mine confirmed (accidentally) by my works occupational health dr (even though both my gp and I told them not to include it in any letters that I may see). My coping mechanism is not to know too many details just tell me what I need to do, i.e. chemo etc. Some people decide they need every bit of information, others not. Hope your staple removal goes well and so does your meeting with your surgeon. xx Kathy xx

[Suzanne333 in reply to Katmal-UK]

Thank you Kathy.

I'm guessing my stage is 3 being as it spread to the omentum. I just don't want to hear the words 'it was aggressive'. That would worry me. My surgeon did say he got all the cancer out and that it was as good as it gets. I'm just worrying that something will go wrong. I find the nearer the end of my treatments, the more I worry. Silly really.

Anyway I hope you are doing ok. Xxx

[Katmal-UK in reply to Suzanne333]

Hi Suzanne. Im fine thanks. If you don't want him to tell you he shouldn't. Mine don't and I have two Consultants (one at Clatterbridge and one at Christie's). I once had a nurse say to me whilst I was waiting for a scan, 'you do know this will come back and will shorten your life'. Yes I had guessed that but to be told shattered my positivity. People cope in different ways as I said before. I can still recall that conversation like it was yesterday. She was so matter of fact like she hadn't just dropped a bombshell. You're not being silly at all btw, you know what you need to do t cope. Talk to your Consultant before he starts so that he understands you. Do let us know how you get on. Kathy xx

[Suzanne333 in reply to Katmal-UK]

Hi Kathy.

Wow. That was pretty blunt for her to say that. No wonder you still remember those words! I think some consultants need lessons in being human. We may have an illness but our feelings and fear don't disappear. They're more heightened if anything.

This is a chronic disease and as time goes on there will be more treatment to help us. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Take care xxxx

[Choski]

As Kathy has already said if you're ok with what you know already then tell him/her that straight away. My surgeon rang me after surgery with my diagnosis and told me what the type was and where it was found. I'm a 'want to know' person so I immediately went on the Internet , looked it up etc and then rang my clinical nurse to ask the questions I had! That works for me but that's not for everyone. 💐

Try and work out what level of info you want and if you'd be ok with not knowing and talk that through maybe with your surgeon when you see them.

Take care

Clare xx

[Suzanne333 in reply to Choski]

Thank you Clare. I think I will tell him that I don't want to know too much. Im not sure what will b discussed in the meeting. Hopefully just good stuff.

Hope all is good with you Clare. Xxx

[Hidden]

I just want to wish you well with your consult, it is a worrying time but worrying doesnt make it better, it makes us worse. I have been there time and time again and it doesnt get easier but sending you a hug

[Suzanne333 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. Xxx

[Carole666]

Suzanne

Go with what you feel comfortable with.

For me knowledge is power. I stress over the unknown but can deal with things once I know the facts. It is sooo easy to build things up in your mind to be much much worse than they actually are.

I hope it went ok.

Hugs

Carole x

[Suzanne333 in reply to Carole666]

Hi Carole.

Thank you. The meeting is next Tuesday. I think I will just go and let him do the talking. He's a lovely consultant. Very human and caring. I will leave it to him.

I hope you are ok. Xxx

[Carole666 in reply to Suzanne333]

Try and equate it to having those pesky staples out....

I built myself up into such a state and the didn't actually feel a thing

Now I try to worry on when I know the facts

Xx

[Suzanne333 in reply to Carole666]

I wasn't dreading the staple removal too much. When the nurse took them out though it wasn't too pleasant. A lot of sore tugging. Glad that bits done. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻Xxx

[Cropcrop]

Hi Suzanne.

Each to her own I say, if you don't want to know then you don't have to, they usually give you the option to not know if you tell them beforehand. They can put a marker in your notes to state you do not want to know. My consultant asked me if I wanted to know the levels and I felt I needed to know every single little detail, I'm better knowing what I'm dealing with when it has a 'name'. I only very recently found out that mine was clear cell carcinoma and it scared me even though I am currently in remission but it had been given a new name that I hadn't had to deal with before.

I found that all my practitioners asked if I knew my grade of cancer before discussions and treatments were carried out, I always want to know my CA125 levels at every clinic at Christies. If you are happier not knowing then that is good, if at any time you change your mind they will always be more than happy to give you as much or as little information you want to know. Sorry your staple removal was painful, that doesn't mean everything else will be bad. Good luck with your consult, fingers crossed for you ❤️