Beds and mattresses

[Fruitandnutcase]

I’m having a terrible time sleeping. I wake up every couple of hours - sometimes even less and I know I’m tired.

I’ve got the room totally darkened out and quiet. The temperature is fine too yet every night I waken over and over again. Usually I waken up really hot.

I blame my mattress. At the moment I’m using one of those new foam mattresses you see advertised. It’s fairly firm but comfortable to lie on but I get hot. I’ve tried other beds round the house with ‘normal’ mattresses but they don’t seem to be that much better. I used to have a Tempur bed but it lost its special powers - it wouldn’t go up or down and would have cost too much to fix so it went out and I got out my old bed frame and bought a Casper mattress which I suppose is the same sort of foam but because it is on a base there is more air circulating below it so it’s not as hot as the Tempur mattress.

I wake up every morning and my back hurts from my waist to the back of my thighs and my buttocks really hurt. If I go off the vertical I’m in real pain, what feels like ‘nerve pain’ that radiates through that area rather than when you have a sore foot or that sort of thing.

I’m just wondering if anyone else has had a similar problem and what did you do about it. Is there any sort of bed that people have found helps their aching body or that stays cool all night. I’m just back from three weeks camping where I slept on a food out canvas camp bed with a foam mat on top and a duvet and I slept well and didn’t feel like this - at the rate things are going I will have to dig it out and sleep on that.

Being awake several times during the night then being in pain in the morning is SO wearing. I’ve tried everything, warm bath with magnesium flakes, paracetamol / ibuprofen before I go to bed etc, etc, nothing seems to be helping at the moment. I either need a new bed or a new body.

Thanks to anyone who has managed to read through this tale of woe, any helpful suggestions will be welcomed.

[Hidden]

My tale of woe is the same as yours. I don’t have any answers. I have a natural hand made mattress I thought this would be the answer I also have silk pillow case ( get me!!!) I have spent a fortune it hasn’t helped. I sleep with the window open no central heating ( my husband bought a thermometer a couple of winters ago and spend most of the time muttering you do know it only 6 degrees in here)but I’m still hot every night... will be interested in other responses...

[Fruitandnutcase in reply to Hidden]

Gosh, we could be twins. I’ve just read your comment about your husband to mine - he is sniggering, he knows just what your poor husband is going through. My other half hates my cold, pitch black sleeping arrangements and moved into the spare room and joins me for a cuddle in the morning.

I had a natural mattress years ago but I found it too firm and that was when I only had a sore back. It’s so annoying when something feels good in the store and isn’t when you’ve bought it!

I’m same as you - I’ve spent a fortune and still no solution. It seems unbelievable doesn’t it. I’ve yet to try silk pillowcases but I’ve been looking at them recently - I’m going to put one on my Christmas list and cross my fingers, they are supposed to be great for your hair and eliminating wrinkles.

Hopefully someone out there will be able to help us.

[Hidden in reply to Fruitandnutcase]

My hair is great in the morning frizz free as for the face 🙄🙄🥺gave up on that a while ago 😂😂😂. My head and hair do feel less hot but from the neck down you could fry an egg. My husband clutches me at night to get warm as I’m like a radiator and I elbow him off 😂😂😂 ( it’s like laurel and hardy) Would love silk sheets too expensive and I’ve visions of sliding out of bed 😂😂😂😂😂

[KittyJ]

Sorry but I have no answers either. I am the same and have spent a lot of money trying different mattresses, pillows, bedding etc but I still have an awful nights sleep. Only thing I can suggest is to see your GP if it’s your back as it could be something going on with the spine/discs as you also mention nerve pain. Hoping we all get some relief soon x

[Kerensa21]

I bought a chillmax pillow about £10 which you can put in fridge & helps keep you cool while dropping off. Have comfortable ikea mattress & always have window open too like you. Tbh lack of sleep seems to me something to do with disease rather than anything I do, worse when active, it’s so wearing I know. I’ve had periods when on new drugs & it seems controlled I actually sleep well but what do I know 😊x

[PinkLamb in reply to Kerensa21]

Hi Kerensa,

Where did you purchase your chillmax pillow from please??

I don't sleep properly like the rest of you!! And when awake I'm having terrible Sweats all night, I have a fan at the side of my bed, which I am constantly switching on and off all night long!!! It's exhausting, and wears you down doesn't it??

X

[Kerensa21 in reply to PinkLamb]

Ooh Robert Dyas at £10.99 I think also on amazon/eBay. They are supposed to stay cool anyway but I find last longer from fridge, about half an hour ish. It’s a pain isn’t it? I was doing really well on benepali but lately sleeping badly again, getting hot, elbow flare etc. Hey ho, make the most of the good spells I guess 😉

[PinkLamb in reply to Kerensa21]

Aw, thank you for that Kerensa,

I was taken off benepali, it stopped working for me!! I'm back on Enbrel, not sure if it's working!! There doesn't seem to be many good spells anymore!! Ah well I'll try and get the pillows!!

Thank you

X

[Kerensa21 in reply to PinkLamb]

Hope Enbrel does work again; it all gets a bit soul destroying doesn’t it. Benepali was great for first 9 months, feel i’m drifting backwards again 🙄 good luck x

[PinkLamb in reply to Kerensa21]

Aw thank you, it does get soul destroying yes, and I feel soooo so dizzy 😵 with it all.....

I hope you that things work out for you too...

X

[Fruitandnutcase in reply to PinkLamb]

Is that the pillow you fill with cold water - it has a layer of foam in it? I used to have one when I was having hot flushes many years ago and it was very good. It used to get a bit warm if you lay in the one position fir a long time but I could always find a colder patch. Eventually it got old and past it and I threw it out. I’ve seen the ones you are talking about. I think they even do larger mattress sizes so that might be an idea.

[PinkLamb in reply to Fruitandnutcase]

Hi,

No you don't fill it with water...

It's called chillmax, it was Kerensa21 who has kindly informed the group of this, you can read about it up the page,...

X

[Lolabridge]

Not getting a restful night’s sleep is so wearing and I do feel sorry for you.

I have had a bad back for years and now very active RD as well. I have a high quality natural fabric mattress with pocket springing with a cool feel mattress topper on it and it’s brilliant. The mattress is Soft tension, and it’s now more than ten years old but still very good. I don’t have a partner now and so there are no more disputes about room temperature, fighting for the duvet etc. You could consider sleeping alone some nights and see if that helps. If you decide on buying a new mattress don’t be tempted to buy one that’s too firm; get proper advice from a reputable retailer. If your OH prefers or needs a firmer tension mattress than you consider two different tension single mattresses zipped and linked.

I still get night sweats sometimes due to the RD and the steroids I’m having to take. I’m glad I don’t have a foam mattress as my friends tell me they can make you feel very hot.

[oldtimer]

my suggestions are: sleep in different rooms so you can have it cold

silk duvet, really light

I didn't get on with silk sheets, too slippery, but use fine weave cotton with a silky finish.

A mattress topper which can be changed frequently because the sweat doesn't do them much good.

A quiet fan.

[Fruitandnutcase in reply to oldtimer]

We do until about 6.30. I used to feel embarrassed about it but I don’t care now. I also found if I was woken up that my other half breathes at a different speed to what I do and that was really disturbing, as was him snoring - could hardly tell him not the breath.

That also let’s me move around the bed all night like a starfish searching out the coldest parts of the bed. I have total darkness - no lights at all from clocks, radios or those little red or blue lights your u get on the phone or chargers - my other half says he can’t sleep in such darkness so we agreed to differ and have a room each for night time.

I’ve got a silk duvet - on the bed now, got a wool duvet and got a goose down one which is good in the winter, it’s really light and not too hot, besides it’s very light to throw off if I get hot and good fine cotton sheets are lovely too.

[Ali_H]

A pure lambs wool mattered topper may help as wool is good at helping regulate temperature plus wicks away moisture but they are expensive.

Ali

[Hidden in reply to Ali_H]

I’ve got one and a wool duvet . Doesn’t work for me ☹️☹️🥺

[Ali_H]

Poo sticks! 🤕

[Fruitandnutcase]

Thank you everyone for your suggestions, it’s good to know that I’m not alone in my quest for the perfect bed and bedding. Maybe we could invent a bed with some sort of built in air cooling system.

I have wondered about what would happen if I stuck a fan below the bed. Would that keep the mattress cooler?

[Hidden in reply to Fruitandnutcase]

Oh no !!!!!! Not under my bed 😱😱I’ll choke on the dust 😷 haven’t been near it for ages (12 months or more) cleaning has been on the back burner for some time work wipes me out