I was awake at 5am, and managed to take a further 2 hrs to get out of bed.
Spent the time looking back and thinking about the hold the cigarrete has had on me over me and the fun times we have had.
In the car : sparking up trying not to crash, the smell - can everyone who gets in whiff it, buy lots of magic tree air freshner, the schmeggy ash on the side of the car, has the flick out of the window worked or is the back seat smouldering.
At golf - 18 holes, about 80 shots, 1 on way, 2 on 1st tee(nerves), 1 every other hole (im outside), 1 for a bad hole (cheer up), 1 for a good hole (celebrate), 1 on the last (cant smoke in the bar) - not far off a pack in 5 hrs
At work, 1 for stress, 1 for completion of something, 1 before start something, do I look busy when outside when having the fag ringing people on my mobile or reading emails or just a pillock, where to chuck the butt that pile of silk cut on the floor cant all be mine
On Holiday - The worry about not smoking for all that time, Is there anywhere worse (maybe hell) than the airport smoking lounge, how can i sneak off at the other end, collecting bags youd think they would let you have at least one in baggage collection, duty free have they my brand, can I get a couple of boxes and not get clocked by wife (40 euros how much?)
Dentist - despite brushing teeth for 6 hrs before I go still have one on the way and spend the whole time knowing that they know
Etc etc - sorry to ramble - that was probably only 10 mins of my 2 hrs but boring myself now
To conclude - I feel the need the need to QUIT and best wishes to all