2000 fags

Hi All

Not been on forum very much as I am still struggling, dont ask me why, my fellow Octos are all doing so brilliantly, bless them.

But I just read a thread about quitting "because you have to quit " rather than because you want to and it really pulled at my heart strings, I so agree.

I have quit for 80 days and my quit counter has just told me that I woud have smoked 2000 fags by now, and how do I feel !!!! I still want one, how sad is that, fell depressed, sad, tearful and lonely.

I have kept going as I read that after 3 months I would start to feel better, well I know its not 3 months yet, but my goodness surely I should feel better by now.

Sorry to post so neagatively after all this time but need help here.

Dee

21 Replies

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  • Hi Dee

    You really don't need to apologise for negative posting and maybe posting more would help? Even the most seemingly daftest of feelings and posts will get a response that may help in some way.

    You really don't need to feel alone. PM me whenever you want. You know you can anyway, but a reminder never hurts :)

    I still want one now and then.... actually more often than not but in a very low level way.

    I didn't really plan on stopping this long but I have and I now want to continue because it makes sense ..... not because I really want to.... so all those that say you can only stop when you really want to and your heads in the 'right' place? ..... they are right to a degree...... but who knows when the time is right? we will only ever know when the time wasn't right... and then we'll live for seconds only after realising that... if we ever do realise that. Silly tangent, sorry Dee.

    You already know you have a good logical reason to quit .....your health

    We are not stupid people....we've known we've diced with that risk for years.... we didn't go into or carry on smoking all these years with rose tinted glasses.

    You know fully the risks of that gamble now............ and the odds are massively 'in your face' not in your favour.

    Somehow, that is your best chance of a wake up call. Keep getting your head around what you may have narrowly escaped.

    The likes of you and I and others who ARE doing this despite not setting out meaning to are doing great.....

    Keep going Dee........ it has to get better and it will. But there's no harm and damage done by being honest and admitting that your still missing a smoke. You have not caved in from 'wanting' so far :cool:

    Love Pol x

  • Thanks Pol

    Just been really down again, thanks for reply I know you are behind me.

    xxx

  • Hi Dee,

    Sorry that you are having a bad time of things. Sadly that's just the way of for a bit whilst you change the mindset that has been the default setting for too many years.

    I dislike stating on the boards that I had a difficult time of things up to 5 and half months...keep thinking that will put folk off. Nevertheless, I did have a difficult time...and now I'm on 2 years.

    If you haven't been here for awhile then maybe you could visit a bit more and read around. Not only that but post to others who have just started their journey to freedom. You'll find yourself trying to be hopefully, positive and regurgitating the information that you have read and possibly taken on board. That should start to form a bedrock of information which will supersede the long term carp and erroneous information that smoking is good for you.

    Like Pol has mentioned, please feel free to PM or post on my home page. I'll look out for your posts and post back.

    Also, remember that this is January and this month is notoriously responsible for the bluest period for most of us. Christmas and New Year are done, it's still Winter and it's still fekin' cold. Not only that the day's are still short. Put things into context and get back to fighting this issue into submission.

    Best wishes,

    Cav x

  • Hi Dee, you have done so brilliantly, i'm so sorry you feel so low. But you have come such a long way it would be a shame not to push it just a little bit further, hang on for a bit, it's going to get so much easier. Last year I quit for 3/4 months, thought it would be OK to just have one. Of course the one turned into two of three a week, until a couple of months later when I was back to 10 and then 20 a day. Back to day 9 now, how I envy you, how silly I was.

    You have been so strong so far, take it day by day, don't look too far ahead.

    You are doing really fab. :D

    Lorraine

  • Dee :)

    Totally unrelated............. have you ever made Jerusalem Artichoke Soup?

    With your gardening expertise and culinary skills, I was just wondering

    x

  • Hey Dee.....if its any help I went through exactly the same thing........I couldnt even bear to be around myself I was so miserable:eek::D.....but those feelings seemed to disappear overnight almost.....I feel fantastic now......so glad that I have given up!!

    I think the secret is to keep busy .....do lots of exercise and read lots of horror storys about smoking....it worked for me;)

    Good luck Dee and feel free to pm me as well........ooh and go out and spend what you have saved by not smoking that helps as well!!

  • Hi Dee

    I hope its some support to know youre not alone I struggle the same way as you. I do use this forum not always posting but looking for guidance from those ahead, I really felt for you in those early days and now. I m so pleased your still quit, thats briliant WEL DONE. I saw a post earlir about some one who wished their life away for 6 months down the trackn I ve got to say I understand that sometimes I feel Im grinding out time. Stay with me Dee we know its worth it

    Louise xx

  • Hi Dee :)

    You're doing great here tsorry you feel so down right now but it will get better Promise

    I always but always feel down both in November [nasty grey month] and also in Jan the days are short, grey, cold and miserable I hate jan with a Vengeance but come Feb and I start to feel better again

    Chin up Dee keep going

    Love

    Marg xx

  • Ah I was exactly the same and like another poster here it went overnight and I feel great about it all now. STill have pangs but nothing like the desperate longing I had at 11 weeks.

    My mood was low, my weight high all these things made me want a ciggie more. here I am today at nearly 4 whole months of no ciggies and I wonder what the hell that was all about, honestly.

    if I get that desperate longing again, i will do my best to hang on in there cos I knew the last one passed

    Keep posting and reading the forum, I read loads of posts and it really helped me to see that many others had exactly the same issues

    xx

  • Sorry you are struggling a bit Dee but you really are doing well, easy to say I know but do see your good too.

    I agree with Cav, don't stay away, come on here and share as often as you can, in sharing you get good, caring answers and someone else will get help and identification from your post. All this helps you to stay stopped as you continually hear the messages you give to others to help them too, you become part of it.

    Jackie

  • Oh my lovely Dee, giving you a hug here.

    This whole quit thing is just ODD, and I totally agree with Cav here as I do not want to put any newbie’s off. I personally thought month 1 was the easiest month probably because you are on a high about giving up and are proud of yourself. Month two for me was hell on earth because I was deranged!

    However month 3 started good and I honestly feel great in myself but I do want a cigarette. However the cravings now are not like they were on day two when I actually thought I would die if I did not have one.

    Dee an ex smoker said to me, month 3 you feel like you have had a breakthrough but it's month 6 when you have it beat. So honey in all honesty I think we have a couple of months still of these cravings but but but but we will get there, it's just going to take us a little more time sweetheart.

    I'm giving you a hug because I know this is very difficult for you, but remember our penthouse suite in St Barts (the Octo lot happen to be very posh!!) and I do expect you to be there!

    We have had our fun and smoked ourselves stupid but now we have to get into that mindset of enough is enough.

    Post anytime and just share with us how you are doing, that is what this forum is for.

    xx

  • Hi Dee,

    Sorry that you are having a bad time of things. Sadly that's just the way of for a bit whilst you change the mindset that has been the default setting for too many years.

    I dislike stating on the boards that I had a difficult time of things up to 5 and half months...keep thinking that will put folk off. Nevertheless, I did have a difficult time...and now I'm on 2 years.

    If you haven't been here for awhile then maybe you could visit a bit more and read around. Not only that but post to others who have just started their journey to freedom. You'll find yourself trying to be hopefully, positive and regurgitating the information that you have read and possibly taken on board. That should start to form a bedrock of information which will supersede the long term carp and erroneous information that smoking is good for you.

    Like Pol has mentioned, please feel free to PM or post on my home page. I'll look out for your posts and post back.

    Also, remember that this is January and this month is notoriously responsible for the bluest period for most of us. Christmas and New Year are done, it's still Winter and it's still fekin' cold. Not only that the day's are still short. Put things into context and get back to fighting this issue into submission.

    Best wishes,

    Cav x

    I think it does everyone the world of good to hear from someone who admits the quit was not easy but is still an ex smoker 2 years down the line.

    You should be very proud of yourself and you are a fantastic example to us all.:)

    xx

  • I too sometimes wish I could find a pill to 'mainline' a nicotine hit! I've managed to convince myself not to think of the smoking aspect. So when I get a crave I think of a shot of pure nicotine instead!

    The craves get easier. But its not uncommon for them to take a while to calm down. I've made posts before where i've said that for me, I have learnt how to manage the craves, they do come, but they pass over me- in the main! I don't post on the forum that often but if you ever me post a flurry of posts that normally means i'm craving for a 'pill'! This forum is my stop smoking lifeline. Keep on going, it does get easier x

  • This is what 2000 fags would look like

    Still want one?????

  • Thanks

    Thanks everyone for all the replies, you are a lovely lot on this forum.

    I am determined to get there will not give in now, I really couldnt imagine going through the last 80 days again.

    Dee

  • Dee my love

    Sorry if our jovial mood on here makes you think we are having it easy, I promise it is not easy hun. Like Christine month 1 was fine, month 2 was hell month 3 was easier but still craving and lots of reminders of cigs.

    Hope you feel better and lot of love and hugs

    xx

  • Struggled for quite awhile myself Dee but I'm still quit, smoking isn't going to be a cure all. I felt down at times beneath the addiction just didn't dwell on it as much as I had a more pressing and immediate concern every hour of every day which was to get nicotine into my blood stream, 20+ times a day, doesn't leave as much time for sorting out your feelings through a haze of drug dependancy.

    2000 fags is also a great milestone, keep going. It really is worth it.

    M

  • Keep Strong...

    Hi Dee, U are doing brilliant, and like most people say its not easy, but lets face it we didnt expect it to be, otherwise we would all have done it along time ago. I quit in March and to be honest, it wasnt until September I felt almost completely free of nico demons annoying me. But they did get alot easier before that, or did I manage them better? I think the message am trying to send to u Dee is U are defro passed the worst, and I for one didnt think I would get this far, but I have and U will too. ;)

    So many great messages posted for you, that should make u feel good.

    U can do this Dee just ride the storm alittle longer, It will be worth it. Kaz x :)

  • Hi Dee

    How have things been crave wise for you recently? I hope the days are beginning to even out for you and your stronger with it all?

    I'm with on the not wanting to go through all this again and I've a less up and down ride than you so far.

    Let us know how you are, wishing you brighter days ahead

    Pol xx

  • Quittings easy staying quit is hard

    Oh god here I was thinking that the last 2 weeks were the worst it could get and here I find a load of you saying that although I was beggining to feel a bit better it could all go pear shaped and I could begin to feel Shi* again.

    Let me think about that for 2 seconds yes I could feel Shi* again but could I feel as Shi* as some one with COPD or Emphysema or Lung Cancerno dont think so. So bring it on, withdrawal crap etc dont kill you but you start smoking again and theres a 90% chance it will my heart goes out to you and im sure that 12 weeks is the worst it can get because after that the brain is repaired and all receptors are back to normal after that its only in the mind and the spring will be here so you will feel better any way maybe you have SAD and didnt know till you stopped? This whole quit has been a rollercoaster of good and bad days but I refuse to admit that I am weaker than an hour or so,s worth of nicotine a day.

    Keep going and let a few of the ones further along the road give you there hand and a pull along will say a prayer for you xx

    PS Sorry if any one thinks Iv been a bit harsh wasnt meant unkindly.

  • Trust me to be late

    Sorry didnt realise you posted mid Jan and I am late on this one . Hope you are feeling better and at least the sun keeps peeping out now and then.

    xx

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