Day 43 and feel like a fag

Im really feeling low low low its my birthday and had a right shit day almost killed me and my HUB he shouted at me and that was it. I was fuming. Reach for a fag why not i havent but im begining to think what the ****. Its either that or go away on my own to norfolk or just divorce him i cant be nice anymore have felt up and down for a while now and im so bloody well fed up . Argue argue argue.

10 Replies

oldestnewest
  • Hi

    Sounds like you are having a tough time generally at present, never mind the quit. Have you thought of discussing your low mood and troubles with your GP?

  • You may feel like a fag now but, how will you feel if you have one after doing so well with your 43 days, just keep promising yourself one in an hours time, then again and then tomorrow. Though you don't feel like being nice now, when you've had a few fags you'll feel less nice. Who will you pick on to blame too? Keep that quit going you'll be ok. David

  • Jacqui, stick with it. You have done so well up until now. One hour at a time that's all you need to do. Don't do what I did the last time, I argued with my OH and anyone else I could get near to so I could blame them for me smoking, in the end I smoked because those stupid little voices in my head told me it would make me feel better, and to be honest it did......for about 5 minutes then I shouted more because I blamed the whole world for me smoking. You are in control, you do what you have to for you, but don't look for an excuse to smoke, you will hate yourself afterwards, honestly. Sorry if that sounded a wee bit harsh, but I believe in being honest. Good luck Jacqui, I hope you stay on your quit ((((((hugs)))))

  • Jacqui please don't smoke, not after 43 days, just think about what you will be throwing away. You and I have both had to restart quits more than once and you know how going back to Day 1 really, really SUCKS :mad:. If I had stuck with my first quit I would have been celebrating 6 months today and been so proud, and to be honest its been really getting to me all day, ended up in tears in Tescos for goodness sake and again tonight. So don't bloody smoke. Do whatever you have to do, kick OH up the b*m, lock him in the shed, whatever, but DO NOT SMOKE cos you will be so gutted. Sorry you're having a bad day on your birthday, but the night is still young so have some 'me' time ;) You can get pizza, curry, cake, ice-cream whatever you fancy. I recommend mississippi mud pies myself they are so lush :p Taste great and could be useful for lobbing at the OH if necessary heehee!! Have a bath in champagne if you like but don't bloody well smoke ya hear??

    Hugs to you (((()))) :)

    Zoe xxxx

  • Birthday Greetings Fleetwood,

    Jeez it's difficult puting up with peeps when they are being really obnoxious .. that's whether you are a smoker or not but really fleetwood smoking isn't the answer nd won't make it go away. What do other peeps do? Try to find a different outlet for your frustrations.

    As a by and by .. first time i decided to quit, using zyban which was new on the market, after 2 or 3 weeks i decided I'd had enough and called it a day with my hubby of 10 years. In retrospect I was probably acting irrationally but then again ... Stopping smoking turns your life upside down, makes you see things fro a different perspective and you have to learn totally new habits, how to deal with situations in a new way. That's not a bad thing and I amn't saying for a moment that you should leave your OH.

    Try to explain to him what how you feel right now, that you are really tetchy and it you clip him round the ear then he probably deserves it :)

    Otherwise get into a different space until you calm down. Go away for a bit .. you need some peace just now. You have come so far so think about the good days both as a non-smoker and with your hubby. Give it time.

    suze x

  • My last birthday

    I suppose we all fall into the trap of expecting our birthdays to be special.

    I'm old enough to know that it doesn't work that way. My last birthday was spend in hospital because of my COPD. I was especially miserable because by being in there, I couldn't smoke as much as I wanted to. :confused:

    See the bad times through without a fag, Fleetwood, and you will be rewarded with a sense of pride and better health for the long term.

    As for the OH - maybe a trip to marriage guidance?

  • Well thanks everyone you all made me laugh with your gestures. And just to let you know i did not light up and proud that i am still smokefree. My OH did say sorry and me too. Had a lovely cake with a forever friends bear on it . Simply delicious. I think alot of my moods not just smoking but worried about me dad too. It just gets too much for me. Anyway many thanks again. Jacqui

  • Good for you Jacqui. Look at this as another little test passed with flying colours. No doubt you will have many more but just do the same as you've done this time. You mention your worry about Dad, more than likely if people do relapse it's not usually one big thing that causes it, it's a few little things building up. Well done again, and keep it up. David xx

  • Happy birthday Fleets. dont let any human being make you so twisted that u end up smoking. wring his neck murder him chop him up and bury the parts . i'll forgive u but if u smoke no forgiveness in the world will console u.

    Mx

  • Well done Jacqui :D You should feel proud for getting through a stressful time cos it ain't easy. I could have murdered a smoke this afternoon for no reason at all :confused: but I didn't. So I am proud of both of us :D And I'm glad the cake was good :D

    Zoe xx

You may also like...