hello beautiful thought, beautiful thoughts reprogram huh....well started day in an okay sort of feel, went through the hum drum of routine, this afternoon was fab took chrissie & caz advice & we had a pretend birthday party, put nme tv on then myself & the lads danced & danced, we did hunt the go go figures(stupid little tiny toys) & had chocolate, lollies, jelly sweets we even lit a candle & sang happy day day today ha ha it was good i must admit the kids had fun & so did i ....its kind of filled a rainy anoon & took my mind off the whole smoking thing infact i thought all the hours & minutes ive smoked ive missed out on my kids.
anyway boring you all yet again...its not all been a beautiful day.. up & down with my moods from teatime onwards ...
thought of the day is that im not constantly thinking of smoking every minute of every day anymore just kind of a real feeling of missing something at a good few times in a day... the craves also dont seem as bad just again when i do get one i kind of feel sad, the thing is i know 100 percent that i wouldnt enjoy a cigarette & i know fully that i most deffo would feel 100percent depressed if i smoked, at the moment i think im coming to terms with the death of my fags?? does that make sense ?
thanks for listening x