3rd month wobbles

Hi all

Im officially into my third month yesterday - 63 days quit from old smokie( get it right up him :D ) <<as they say in scotland!

I had my xmas night out last Saturday and at one point in the night i was offered a cig , i immediately said no thanks ! As soon as i said no thanks and the bearer of the death sticks had walked away i then started to feel a lil urge to see "old Nic " again . Had the pattering of thoughts going through my head telling me to reunite with my old friend!!

It seemed my head was telling me that i enjoyed cigarettes before-, that when i blew out the smoke from my mouth there was no better feeling in the world...it was relief ....like a massage after a hard day ....like putting your feet up after walking miles...it was your reward for all you had done....i had earned it!

I recognised this for what it was ofcourse - it was a craving .....but this was a different craving than before . It was an almost nostalgic urge to smoke again , and in some ways harder to confront than the initial cravings you get when you first stop . I know i hated smoking when i did..i hated myself when i was smoking ...i always wanted to stop when i was smoking....so how can i for a brief moment remember smoking as being good and something that i missed?

Like i said im now going into my 3rd month quit and ive heard that alot of people fall out on the third month....i have often wondered why this is but after Saturday i think this is the reason why, The Nicotine comes at you from another angle than before ....its like its an intelligent being almost in the way that it recognises its beat and tries a different tactic ! hard to describe but can the others that are 2 months + in to their quit relate to this? Add into the equation that your initial resolve and excitment has dwindled since your quit date then this is a very dangerous time.

Many people on here have said Education is the best way to stay quit...read read read....I cant express enough how true this is, if i hadnt stayed close to forums or read up on what lay ahead in my quit then i think "old Nic " would have won the day with his dirty tactics at my night out.

Just thought i would share this experience for the ones on the same stage of their quit as i am and just to remind them....... Be aware of such things , and be prepared for these thoughts and feeling towards smoking! When they arise .....kick its ass !!

8 Replies

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  • Well done Chilly

    Whatever angle Nic comes at you from keep beating him back.

    Hes still around in my quit but I've got him cowering in the corner now.

    Keep it up:)

  • Well done Chilly - and thats a great post.

    I haven't suffered from the month 3 wobbles, thankfully - but I would never dream of underestimating them... I have seen many people fall or struggle greatly through month 3. There are other "popular" trouble points (month 9 comes up again and again) but as long as we are ready - education is indeed the key to it - to reconfirm our commitment when they come, it will be a relatively simple matter of choosing not to smoke.... again.

    You have a very strong quit going, and I have no doubt that you will win.... Well done once more.

  • Wise words chilly…

    That’s pretty much the way it is. Our resolve weakens with time spent smoke free but don’t fall into the trap of thinking it happens at any particular month. Some people never get complacent, some do it after as little as a month. As most of us on here can genuinely testify to, there’s no such thing as “just one won’t hurt” and the mantra, “never take another puff” is the only sure and guaranteed way.

    The strongest thing I discovered was the fact that we didn’t give anything up, there was no sacrifice involved. Earlier quits for me had failed because I sought out tobacco, although quit, at a time of high emotion falsely thinking that it would help my situation. Once you accept that it can’t help in the slightest then that conduit to failure is immediately closed. The harder one is the drunken smoke and needs to be watched like a hawk.

    Don’t give Nicotine a status it doesn’t deserve though. It’s a nasty little insecticide what we chose to absorb but it’s gone in a week or two. It’s not a conscious being with desires on our will it’s just a poison we tolerated. After those first couple of weeks it’s just us versus our subconscious, nicotine plays no more part than unleaded petrol does in our wish to smoke again.

    :)

  • nicotine plays no more part than unleaded petrol does in our wish to smoke again.

    Made me chuckle:D:D:D

  • Well done Chilly.

    The nostalgic urges continue from time to time, odd but I have had a few recently myself. Never difficult to resist but a useful reminder of the fact I'm an addict.

  • Aye there is a reason.

    Its because when you first give up, the breaking of the habit or "giving up" uses the part of your brain known as your conscious mind (eg the forefront)- ie. Things that are at the front of yoru thoughts, think about how often you thought of smoking when you stopped. You think about it as you go around your normal life. Its where we keep things, so they are hand when we need them, the tips we used to stay off them, the will power etc etc. Its with you. It keeps you alert. Its keeps you focused.

    Then as time, goes by and you get more used to "giving up" your mind no longer needs to keep it in the conscious mind as stopping becomes second nature, and moves it to the sub-conscious mind - ie, the brains little filing cabinet, where we keep all the useful bits and bots that we need to know, but don't need on hand at all times.

    And thats where it gets you. You know that you need to say no, because you have taught yourself that already (when it was in the front of your mind), but you cant quiet put your hand on the file (all those reasons you gave up, all those little tricks you used to give up, all things that kept you going strong), and then your brain tries to start to find the answers somewhere else. and here's the funny thing, by telling yourself you have "given up" tricks your brain into thinking it is something good, something you have deprived yourself of, so its starts to remind you of all the goods bits about it, what you miss, how it felt etc etc

    So when you get like this again, tell your brain you have "stopped" and it should push the thoughts away.

    I hope this made sense.

  • I recognised this for what it was ofcourse - it was a craving .....but this was a different craving than before . It was an almost nostalgic urge to smoke again , and in some ways harder to confront than the initial cravings you get when you first stop . I know i hated smoking when i did..i hated myself when i was smoking ...i always wanted to stop when i was smoking....so how can i for a brief moment remember smoking as being good and something that i missed?

    Excellent post and very helpful to me. This is just how I felt yesterday on and off but rather than letting it go I kept harping on and on!

    We seem to so easily forget how when we did smoke, we hated smoking and we disliked ourselves for smoking......then we feel euphoria when we stop then after a while.......we maybe get a bit blase about it and before we know it we are romanticising about blasted cigarettes again!!! How the mind plays tricks on us.

    Nostalgia is never very accurate anyway and the rose tinted glasses about smoking really is scraping the bottom of the barrel - this is what I am doing now but still, at least I will have survived this latest set of tricks.

    Hard work this quitting isn't it?

    Well done Chilly and thanks for an insightful post.

  • chilly,.what an excellent post,,i had a bad day on sunday,. but bit my lips and it went ,after a time,,i think we all take heart from all the posts we send each other,,like the musatears [ ALL FOR ONE,,.AND ONE FOR ALL]. keep the faith all the best tony

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