OCD, worries about weight gain and eating "perfectly"

[HannahMae]

Hi there, my name is Hannah and I have Just Right OCD. I've been seeing an OCD/anxiety therapist for 2 years and have been working on CBT, but my fears just don't seem to ever go away. It feels like every minute, I am stressing over if I have gained weight and eating is such a struggle. If I don't feel like I've eaten the "perfect" amount, my body is going to be "off", no longer "perfect" like it was. And it could keep spiraling if I'm not careful and I could just get bigger and bigger and it scares me so much, I wish I wasn't alive most of the time. I feel so bad after I eat and I always worry I haven't eaten at the "right" times. I feel like I have to walk enough so that I don't get fat, but I rarely do because I don't have any motivation any more to do anything I used to like to do. I also feel like food is "damaging" my throat if I swallow it wrong or too much goes down at once. Not sure what to do anymore...my family has been a support for me, but they just encourage me to keep fighting and I don't think I can anymore.

[Hidden]

Hi Hannah:

Are you taking any medication for OCD? So many of us have experienced some relief from medication. It is wonderful that you have your family's support. They are right. You need to keep fighting the OCD. You WILL get better. Do you work and/or have a hobby that might help move your thinking in a different direction? I am ignorant of the difference between seeing this as OCD as opposed to maybe an eating disorder because it seems that all your thoughts are focused on food. I said a prayer for you, and wish you the best. There IS hope and help. Don't ever forget that. I wonder if a different doctor/therapist could help you more. I'm just thinking out loud. Am definitely not an expert, but I do care and am concerned about you.

[Wheeloffortune]

Hi Hannah! I’m sorry for the pain and intense anxiety and fear you are experiencing! We all can relate to this😢 have you tried medication? An SSRI? It has been a life changer for me. It helps me to be able to implement the tools the therapist suggests. It sounds like you struggle with food issues. Does your therapist do ERP? If not, I would encourage you to find one that does. It’s the best for OCD!!

You can get help finding a therapist from the international OCD Foundation. Love and hugs💖

[bab5]

Hello there. I also suffer from Just Right OCD. I have been seeing a therapist and working on CBT for half as long as you. I, too, feel as if my fears just never go away. They really don’t.

I am constantly stressing about the fact that i, or anyone, could collapse and die at any moment. It’s possible, and that’s what gets me. OCD is called the Doubting Disease for a reason.

If I stray from the parameters/rules of Just Right OCD, I feel that I am risking death or risking a bad occurrence to take place. I feel that I’m about to jinx the future. I know what Just Right OCD feels like.

I understand the spiraling phenomenon as well. The longer I ignore the Just Right OCD, the louder the thoughts and fears scream at me in my head.

I, too, was at the point where I had ZERO motivation at all.

I had no idea what to do.

Your family is exactly right. I hope that you keep fighting because I promise that I reached the point where I simply didn’t think that I could do it anymore.

It will get better. I promise.